lower thread count than primark sheets on here today
i've had a shit morning. due to my own ineptitude i had to schlep to the dvla in wimbledon to renew my car tax. they don't have a car park. how can a building that deals with cars not have a car park?? anyway, it was a shit long trek and it cost me £270 for the privilege. cunts.

what's pissed on your chips today?

or what's added cheese and onions to them?

or, speaking of chips... LUNCH?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:25, 50 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

SEMEN PATEL

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:27, Reply)

no thanks, i'm on a diet

( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:30, Reply)

Do it online you feckless retard.

( Kroney, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:28, Reply)

Utterly devoid of anything remotely resembling feck, this one.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:29, Reply)

How long have I known her for, now?
Five years? My mind has never stopped boggling.
( Kroney, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:32, Reply)

this was the problem
the v11 never turned up, and i cannot find my v5 anywhere. the dvla flatly refused to post me a new v11, so i had to schlep out there. even worse, the cunts are closing it down and centralising it in swansea in 2013. fucking useless.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:30, Reply)

How have you managed to lose your V5?
Oh my God. You constantly surprise me.
( Kroney, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:31, Reply)

i thought it was in my file at my dad's
but i suspect the useless cleaner may have filed it in the bin. anyway, the cunt cost me £25 to replace it.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:37, Reply)

I hope the cleaner got a gud whippin from massa

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:52, Reply)

i don't even own an whip

( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:54, Reply)

Car tax? Car tax? Has it really got as dull as that? Fucking hell.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:34, Reply)

sorry
what phone have you got then? or what flavour cake do you like best? or what colour kitten would you get?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:36, Reply)

spunk
to all three.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:38, Reply)

a spunk coloured cat?
niche
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:45, Reply)

He coloured it himself.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:48, Reply)

Don't mention cats please. Already had one put down this week and I am rehoming another on Sunday.
I don't like cake. I have an iPhone.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:38, Reply)

and you call her dull

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:47, Reply)

first world problems be totes harsh yo.

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:39, Reply)

there is nothing first world about the DVLA
the cunt in front of me who kept the whole line waiting for hours with some query over his dodgy imported car was kicking off. he swore blind he was going to sue the DVLA. all because he was too retarded to fill in a form properly and before he got in the queue. how the fuck do they do their jobs without murdering everyone?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:44, Reply)

they had their brains removed.

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:45, Reply)

£270 for your car tax??
What does it run on? Burning rainforests?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:40, Reply)

i don't know
but apparently the VAT when i bought it and the amount of tax i pay when it costs me over £100 to fill the tank wasn't enough.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:42, Reply)

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:43, Reply)

yes
do they not know how many manicures i could get for £270?

100.

that is how many.

and we all know which is more important to society.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:44, Reply)

You pay £2.70 for a manicure? Or your maths is wrong and you pay £27. and could get 10 for £270.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:45, Reply)

oh fuck
fucking maths fail
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:46, Reply)

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:47, Reply)

gash

( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:48, Reply)

Where IS Lab?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 14:04, Reply)

flying home from america right about now I'd reckon.

(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 13 Sep 2012, 14:07, Reply)

Also, he thinks you're all a bunch of syphilus ridden window lickers.
But not me. I'm awesome.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 13 Sep 2012, 14:08, Reply)

          S E M E N       P A T E L
( broadsword now that's fresh, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:45, Reply)

HEY

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:48, Reply)

♥ ^{♥ KRISTINE! ♥} ♥
( broadsword now that's fresh, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:55, Reply)

♥ ^♥ BROADSWORD ♥ _♥
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 14:00, Reply)

Nothing has annoyed me yet today
and I had an all you can eat lunch, so anything that involves moving is out for the rest of the afternoon.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:48, Reply)

I succunbed to the illness of vegetarianism,
and had a spinach and chickpea curry, brown rice and a green salad. Fruit for breakfast too. I must be sickening for something bad.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:49, Reply)

nah man, that's just being healthy.
do that allll the time here.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:52, Reply)

Yeah, I know, I've actually cut right down on meat.
In was vegi for 15 odd years, and vegan for a few of them, but bacon tempted me one day, and I've never looked back. Although I could never be cross with bacon.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Thu 13 Sep 2012, 14:00, Reply)

See bacon was the first thing I went off.
I was 10 and I was eating it and all of a sudden it just tasted horrible. Stopped eating it and haven't looked back. Don't even like the smell.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 13 Sep 2012, 14:02, Reply)

^ woolly woofter

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 14:03, Reply)

Dad
Always dad

Been limping around for a week, my mom dug a half inch splinter out of my foot
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 13:52, Reply)

I've been feeling great at the gym.
This evening I ran a km in 7 minutes. I was pretty damn chuffed considering I haven't been able to run in about 18 months.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 13 Sep 2012, 14:01, Reply)

I like to run 25 min 5kms...have you got one leg or something?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 14:10, Reply)

No, I had a car accident last year and tore all the small muscles that sort of hold the hip together.
had to have 3 months of physiotherapy because I thought it would stop hurting on its own and it didn't, and by the time I got help I'd fucked up my spinal alignment by compensating all my bodyweight. I still limp when it's particularly cold.

So yeah, running a km in 7 minutes, that's a great achievement.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 13 Sep 2012, 14:13, Reply)

tl;dr

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 14:15, Reply)

lazy fuckwit.
right. good night losers. I'm off to sleep.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 13 Sep 2012, 14:15, Reply)

Seems woman around the world can't drive

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 14:16, Reply)

Pissed on my chips you say?
I really fancied going to the seaside this weekend. A quick look at train prices has sorted that idea right out. Cunts.
(berk, Thu 13 Sep 2012, 14:26, Reply)

£270 for road tax?
FFS.

My chips are being augmented by my long weekend which consists of taking my GF away to the sunny west coast paradise that is Rothesay on the isle of Bute.

I expect it to piss down all weekend.

Lunch - I grabbed a roll on the way back from 5 a sides.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Thu 13 Sep 2012, 14:46, Reply)