is it mainly for me because i can't comment on mothers day? :(
of course i've been on hundreds of them. i fucking love a bit of spa-day action. nicest two are the scarlet in cornwall (outdoor hot tub on a cliff top and even a lovely 5 star is not v expensive) and the five bubble spa moddershall oaks in stone.

worst anecdote: booked the sanctuary in london for part of my friend's hen do. as it's £100 per person before you even get into treatments, the girls had to book their own. which they did. when i rang up to book for me (bridesmaid) and the bride.... they were fully fucking booked..... i had to get one of the other girls to give up her place to the bride and take her out for afternoon tea instead.

best anecdote: the sanctuary has a sleep retreat. on a different weekend, my friend booked us in for 11am. ridiculous, i said. who the fuck can sleep at 11am? 2 seconds later... zzzzzzzzzzz.......
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 21 Feb 2013, 11:25, 1 reply, 12 years ago)

pls miss whats a sleep retreat is it just a bed

( Theoban What of it, Thu 21 Feb 2013, 11:28, Reply)

+ a handful of barbituates

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 21 Feb 2013, 11:31, Reply)

poor rachelswipe
has to go off to cornwall just to get a bit of shuteye
didn't realise lawyers were so hard up these days
broken britain :(
( Theoban What of it, Thu 21 Feb 2013, 11:37, Reply)

It's the children I feel sorry for.


No, sorry, The other one. Get turned on by.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 21 Feb 2013, 11:38, Reply)

no
it's a dark room with candles and beds with velvet soft covers. the beds emit some sort of waves that make you sleepy (you can't go on if you're pregnant). then they play you some kind of relaxtion tape.

it sounded like a load of shitbollocks. i struggle to sleep, only sleep about 4 hours a night normally, but this worked like a fucking treat.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 21 Feb 2013, 11:53, Reply)

they probably rifle through your purse when you're snoozing
I would
( Theoban What of it, Thu 21 Feb 2013, 11:54, Reply)

+ spam

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 21 Feb 2013, 11:56, Reply)

That's horrid
I would never ram my grubby fat fingers up her foetid mimsy
( Theoban What of it, Thu 21 Feb 2013, 12:08, Reply)

it'd be like a piglet diving into peaches and cream

( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 21 Feb 2013, 12:09, Reply)

Be like Pooh getting stuck grabbing some honey
Except the honey is now rotting ham
( Theoban What of it, Thu 21 Feb 2013, 12:10, Reply)

poor piglet

( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 21 Feb 2013, 12:12, Reply)

eeyore never fed him :(

( Theoban What of it, Thu 21 Feb 2013, 12:13, Reply)

you'd find
a debit card, about 50p in cash, and a metric fucktonne of old receipts.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 21 Feb 2013, 12:00, Reply)

I could with 50p, need to get the bus home

( Theoban What of it, Thu 21 Feb 2013, 12:05, Reply)

I lie, like I would ever get on a bus

( Theoban What of it, Thu 21 Feb 2013, 12:05, Reply)

i quite like london buses
on the strict conditions that: (i) there are no other passengers; (ii) they do not smell; and (iii) there is no traffic.

these pre-conditions are rarely met.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 21 Feb 2013, 12:09, Reply)

+ two ginsters pies and a bottle of hair die.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 21 Feb 2013, 12:11, Reply)