Another Monday morning, yeah
How do you treat Mondays, are you a miserable scrote or are you happy and at one with a full working week ahead?

Alt: So another NASCAR crash
www.independent.co.uk/sport/motor-racing/at-least-30-nascar-fans-hurt-in-horror-crash-at-daytona-8508394.html
Have you ever been involved in a crash?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:00, 102 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Miserable scrote
Alt: don't give a toss, soz
Yes I was in a horrendous crash when I was about 18. Scared the shit out of me and is a major contributor in my dislike of cars and why I never learnt to drive. I would subconsciously brace my feet when I sat in the front of a car for about ten years afterwards.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:05, Reply)

Morning Boyce
I kinda thought most of you Brizzle bashers would be off today
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:07, Reply)

I was in bed by about 11 Saturday night.
Mind you I was thrown out of a pub by half six and had drunk four beers by noon so early start, early finish.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:11, Reply)

well at least there was Koal to look after you

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:15, Reply)

No, he went to Newcastle.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:16, Reply)

OH COME ON, NOTHING???

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:33, Reply)

Nothing.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:34, Reply)

Why were you thrown out?

(PsychoChomp, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:59, Reply)

Guess.

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:33, Reply)

Massive drugs?

(PsychoChomp, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:34, Reply)

100% miserable scrote.
I've got to go to Knightsbridge this morning for a meeting with some fucking stupid clients who can't decide what they want.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:08, Reply)

Punch em in the tit's

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:09, Reply)

Thanks,

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:10, Reply)

You mean thank's

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:11, Reply)

Thanks'

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:15, Reply)

N'o prob:z

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:16, Reply)

I had a fucking weird weekend
A good friend of mine died on Saturday morning.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:13, Reply)

Sorry to hear that

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:15, Reply)

are you fuck.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:16, Reply)

Please PD
Don’t doubt my sincerity in this matter
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:23, Reply)

Under what circumstances?
I'm not accusing you of anything btw. Not yet.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:15, Reply)

he was the front seat passenger in a Land Rover
A lorry drove into it head on. He has a 4 year old son
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:18, Reply)

That's awful.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:28, Reply)

I know.
I hope the picture on the news story is a stock photo, because if it's the actual wreck then where he was sitting is just a crumpled mess.

Thankfully his wife didn't go to identify him, he would have been in a right mess.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:32, Reply)

I'm not sure the Gareth Cheeseman of financial services is capable of murder.
Surprisingly.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:18, Reply)

I know an accountant called Gareth Cheesman
He works in insurance.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:22, Reply)

shit man.
That's a bit heavy.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:52, Reply)

Worst crash I have been in
I was driving one of these:

www.google.co.uk/search?q=z4m&hl=en&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=cR0rUZrrLqH80QX5toGYCg&ved=0CD8QsAQ&biw=1680&bih=965

Not exactly the largest & most protective of vehicles.

Another car lost control on the M40 and went in to me at about 80mph, the force of which smashed me in to a third car & all three cars ended up on the motorway embankment.

Luckily I was unscathed.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:17, Reply)

Yeah, that was a lucky escape.
Still At least there was one less BMW on the road.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:19, Reply)

fewer

(King Zog of Albania lives in Kensington, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:57, Reply)

Serves you right for driving a ridiculous penis extension

( Peej, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:29, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1873993
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:30, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1874003
( Peej, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:31, Reply)

I did do the occasional track day in that car.
But the Z4M is also a good day to day road car.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:32, Reply)

did you have the last laugh?

(King Zog of Albania lives in Kensington, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:52, Reply)

No, just a bill for the insurance excess.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:53, Reply)

Some girl shunted me up the arse in her Fiesta at 20mph once.
I've never tried pegging since.

BOOM
( Kroney, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:22, Reply)

I thought you would be able to outrun any danger?
No sign of the ticket yet?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:24, Reply)

The girl at the ticket office said it could take up to 11 days
for the coppers to even issue it. So I was told to call back this week and they should be able to tell me.
( Kroney, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:26, Reply)

I wrote off a Mini when I was 19
Rolled it, luckily they're surprisingly strong. Just as well there was no-one in the passenger seat though, they'd have been squashed flat I think.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:28, Reply)

You had sex with Battered when you was 19?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:29, Reply)

hahaha!

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:35, Reply)

Mondays are just as bad as any other working day really
I've been in a few minor crashes but I do have a funny sorry about my dead dad. He had a two toned Austin Allegro and decided to put speakers in the back. he cut holes and attached them. When driving back home from Leeds he had a car pull out in front of him. He managed to avoid hitting them by performing a superb emergency stop. Unfortunately he had neglected to screw down the new speakers which flew out. Due to the lack of head rests one hit him on the back of the head, knocking him out cold and caused him to drive full pelt in to a house. Fun times were had by all!
( Peej, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:35, Reply)

LOL!!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:36, Reply)

did you check out those Puma Clydes I linked you to?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:38, Reply)

I just checked the link but got the same page in full
There are some bent looking pastel ones on there, hope you weren't suggesting I look at those. White on either mint green or red are best.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:49, Reply)

Chimp sell some cool stuff.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:01, Reply)

At school we (cruelly) nicknamed a kid 'Chockyviva'.
As his father was killed in a car accident driving a Vauxhall Viva. Apparently the accident was caused by him choking on a chocolate bar.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:37, Reply)

Hahaha kids are such pricks.

( Kroney, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:40, Reply)

What happened to NO CAR CHAT!
Look whats happening! No-one agrees with me! Al is a cunt!
( Peej, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:44, Reply)

Frank must have posted

(King Zog of Albania lives in Kensington, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:51, Reply)

Monday is often my day off, so I quite like them.
I've had 3 serious crashes in my life, one was my fault and nearly killed me when I slammed my motorbike in to a tree at about 50, the second was a bit lol, as we drove a land rover through a river ford, thinking it would be cool, but the current was a bit strong and rolled the truck, floating us down river a fair old way. The third was not my fault and almost lost me my leg, and the boring hospital stay for that one is the reason I started posting here. That was a scary crash.

I watched that nascar race, was a brutal crash.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:51, Reply)

alright WeePee
10 months to christmas!
(King Zog of Albania lives in Kensington, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 8:53, Reply)

let the good times roll Frank.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:12, Reply)

I've got broadband at home now guys!1!
It's only 10mb up 10mb down though, so I think sometihng has gone wrong.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:03, Reply)

Who installed it Nakers?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:05, Reply)

No Mr BT man, he had to charge his phone at mine.
What a cheek!
(PsychoChomp, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:06, Reply)

Ask the ISP what the contention ratio is.
Essentially how many homes are accessing the last few yards from the road terminal at the same time. That way you can tell if there's anything you can do; if the ratio is ok you may need a different router.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:06, Reply)

It's Infinity, so it should be relativley low because it only became available in the area in December.
According to the website I shouldn't ring up to moan for 3 days, because the connection will be unstable. I'll moan at them tomorrow evening if I'm not getting anything better.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:08, Reply)

can I be in this boring subthread too?

(King Zog of Albania lives in Kensington, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:09, Reply)

Sure, link up a picture of your speedtest!

(PsychoChomp, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:10, Reply)

dunno what you're talking about, soz
I can post a Momo video if that helps?
(King Zog of Albania lives in Kensington, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:12, Reply)

The green bird of happiness

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:13, Reply)

here's a recent photo of me and Momo enjoying the beautiful architecture in our home city
kineticnorth.com/userfiles/Gilgamesh/FrankAndMomoManchester.jpg
(King Zog of Albania lives in Kensington, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:16, Reply)

Shopped, there's no green in manchester.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:17, Reply)

it was sunday morning, they hadn't hosed the vomit away

(King Zog of Albania lives in Kensington, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:18, Reply)

Buy one get one free on Apple Sourz the night before obviously.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:22, Reply)

No HIGH END PHOTO CHAT

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:18, Reply)

BT are shitweasels for this
I know cock all about IT, but when I had BT broadband they would only unthrottle the connection to the maximum speed it stayed stable at for 3 days. In the 3 years I was in the house, 2 days 4 hours was the maximum length of time my connection stayed up for. I think they did it deliberately.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:49, Reply)

I used to go to a pub quiz on Monday nights, it was a way of keeping the weekend going, per se
Haven't done that in months though, might have to restart it soon.

Alt: A few, none serious though. I was once on a coach that took out a Micra, that wasn't the best.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:26, Reply)

I also avoided being rammed from behind by inches once
on the dual carriageway not far from work. I was speeding, so the guy behind me was also. Lights ahead go green, car in outside lane stays stationary. Oops. I brake pretty hard (Escorts didn't have ABS) but stop short, without skidding, swearing like mad at the idiot who hadn't set off. ...when I become aware of a large cloud of blue smoke floating past. Funny, thinks I, I'm sure I didn't lock any wheels? Check all 3 mirrors, nothing behind at all. Look right to see a Fiesta sat on the (fortunately wide, flat and barrierless) central reservation, chap behind the wheel white as a sheet.
Still have no idea how he missed me, but very glad he did , would have gone right through me I think.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:39, Reply)

The last brown trouser moment I had behind the wheel
I had just over taken an HGV when one of its tyres blew out the noise is what I imagine a bomb would sound like. Scared the living crap out of me
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:45, Reply)

I was in a car crash once
at the age of 2 or 3. My dad was bombing it up a steep and narrow country/mountain road, oblivious to the postal van doing similar speeds coming down in the opposite direction. The vehicles met at some speed, my mother's NHS specs went through the windscreen and were found, undamaged, on the grass verge and my dad's elderly mini was written off. no further damage was suffered.

After the crash, my concerned parent questioned me carefully to ensure I hadn't been traumatised by this horrific event. Apparently my answer was "BANG!" with a big smile. I think I was probably damaged irreparably that day.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:42, Reply)

This incident explains so much.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:43, Reply)

Batts start a new thread
This ones dead
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:47, Reply)

I've done a new one!

(PsychoChomp, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:52, Reply)

Thanks Chompy
we can always count on you
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:54, Reply)

still haven't picked up daytona for my sega saturn yet
i'll get on ebay right now
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:43, Reply)

NO HIGH END GAMING CHAT

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:46, Reply)

i'll talk about my end as and when i wish

( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:54, Reply)

Morning!
Mondays aren't too bad, usually I spend Sunday recovering from Saturday night and end up in bed at a reasonable hour.

Alt: I was waiting at a junction when a woman drove into the back of me at 30mph. "I just didn't see you". Stove in the back and wrote my car off. Ambulance turned up pretty quick once I mentioned she was bleeding from the mouth (turned out she'd just bitten her tongue but was on blood thinners).
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:51, Reply)

I trust she bit her tongue as a result of you punching her for crashing in to you.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 9:53, Reply)

I was more concerned with the fact that I was horribly hungover
and not 100% certain I'd pass a breathalyser (I did of course, before people start).
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 25 Feb 2013, 10:07, Reply)