IN honour of the passing of Boycie, I challenge you all to rap/poem/haiku about yourself or another b3tan

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:09, 94 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

Pakistani Cow
His real name is Mohammed
Now my favourite
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:13, Reply)

\o/

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:23, Reply)

wikipedia maven
With eyes like rape raisins
He found life frustrating, so he commenced on hating
The fat girl that gave him her hole.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:14, Reply)

rapesins?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:26, Reply)

I got beatz an I got riddims
I rock a mic tight like an Indian chillum
I wrote a rap once but it turned out shit
It's just making stuff rhyme and it's not that hard, really now, is it?
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:17, Reply)

Hamster up his bum
Each foot inside a clown shoe
A turquiose Scotchcunt
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:21, Reply)

hahaha!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:23, Reply)

one-trick pony, asks
daft questions, never responds
subtracts from the board
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:22, Reply)

In northern Sunderland born and raised
Down the Dene was where I spent most of my days
Building camps, hiding, tree swings all cool
And all shootin some football outside of school
When a couple of guys who were up to no good
Started making fires in my neighbourhood
We had one little blaze and my brows got charred
She said "WTF you done there, you bovine retard?"
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:23, Reply)

That's a bit rubbish.
Discuss.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:42, Reply)

pah

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:46, Reply)

Poetry is shit.
Here's Boyce's finest hour.

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post907591
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:26, Reply)

I do think some people need sudden death.
I'm going to compile a list.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:38, Reply)

\o

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 14:23, Reply)

*fade to spotlight*
Trembling fingers pound sweaty keys
Frustrated retorts cloud the forums
Empty bottle hits the floor
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:26, Reply)

Narrow it down please!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:28, Reply)

Eagerly he runs in her steps
Her attention is short and fleeting
Ad infinitum.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:28, Reply)

poor chocho

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:28, Reply)

'runs'?

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:28, Reply)

"oozes"

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:32, Reply)

One of two

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:41, Reply)

sweats

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:33, Reply)

he gets hard over Fungus
He is Doctor Frogular.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:31, Reply)

ent very gud izzit?

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:36, Reply)

He is just a cunt
Oh yeah, I really mean it
I hope that he dies
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:37, Reply)

Ribbit
Moo Moo Moo
*Jazz hands*
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:39, Reply)

The last thread interested me more than this one
Alexander Salmond is a fuck-witted ignorant spastic. Give Scotland their independance, let him run it for a bit and they'll be bankrupt and willing to give up their sovereignty all over again in no time.

The Scottish are like children. Soemtimes you've just got to let them be idiotic, get a boo boo and come running back to mother.
( Kroney, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:44, Reply)

Except they are not the only ones who will be affected by this nonsense

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:46, Reply)

I know right, how long ago was Braveheart ffs, 1995?
Get. Over. It.
They will go bankrupt using OUR money.

Throw your hands up at me.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:47, Reply)

Hollaaaaa

( Kroney, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:55, Reply)

ndaise

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 14:10, Reply)

I assume if they get it they'll have their own currency.
I suggest 12 groats to the Jimmie. 20 Jimmies to the Connelly.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:50, Reply)

You don't need to make stupid assumptions, they have published a manifesto.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:52, Reply)

Yeah. They're keeping the pound and the bank of england.
Whilst joining the EU.

They're also going to remain a member of NATO without having any nukes in their country or waters.

Ignorant. Fuck-witted. Spastic.
( Kroney, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:54, Reply)

Hello?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:57, Reply)

I like how they had to accommodate voters whose main concerns were whether they'd still be able to get Eastenders on the telly
Tackling the big issues of independence there.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:59, Reply)

They're going to ditch BBC Scotland for
"A Scottish broadcasting agency which will maintain close ties with the rest of the BBC".

Emphasis mine. I really don't think Salmond knows how independance works.
( Kroney, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 14:04, Reply)

How did Rushdie get into Scottish Politics anyway?

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 14:06, Reply)

McSatanic Verses innit

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 14:09, Reply)

I can't see that being as popular as the Quarter Pounder tbh

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 14:25, Reply)

how about an epitaph for monty
here lies monty boyce (off the internet)

...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 13:50, Reply)

I am genuinely sad that Boyce doesn't post any more
His constant bile kept the post count up
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 14:05, Reply)

^^^

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 14:05, Reply)

There'll be others. We just have to reel them in.
Spread the word everyone!

Shall we make flyers?
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 14:07, Reply)

I'm sure there will be, yes
He just managed a lolsome quote very often
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 14:08, Reply)

Haiku for Monty
Irritable man
Swearing on the internet
This is fucking shit
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 14:13, Reply)

likin' dis

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 14:15, Reply)

Is everyone in mourning?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 14:34, Reply)

No, just having a shit

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 14:34, Reply)

I know what you mean
last night's curry was not my friend this morning
(Xav loves PhillieJoe, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 14:38, Reply)

Someone do a new thread please

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 14:34, Reply)

I haven't even met that Stark woman
There once was a user called Xav
And a really sore throat he did have
He asked b3ta for help
(Such a trusting young whelp)
And promptly deleted his account and killed himself

*counts syllables*

Yeah, that'll do.
(Xav loves PhillieJoe, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 14:34, Reply)

attention to detail
I like that
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 14:45, Reply)

Stop sucking dirty dick.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 14:51, Reply)

*works hard for the money*

(Xav loves PhillieJoe, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 14:55, Reply)

Can someone start a thread about schooling and education for their fucking cunt kids please?

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 14:52, Reply)

Can someone start a thread about lolarious sockpuppets please?

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 14:54, Reply)

OT is dead

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 14:55, Reply)

Can someone start a thread about OT being dead please?

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 14:56, Reply)

Can someone start a new thread about starting a new thread please?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 26 Nov 2013, 14:56, Reply)