what does today have in store for you?
It's my last day in my current job. Going for a pint at lunch.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:11, 61 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

will any of your colleagues turn up?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:13, Reply)

yer
It's pie and pint at the Hop.

As of Monday I will be Senior Admin Assistant at ppiclaimz4u
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:15, Reply)

your little troll bumchum ain't here yet to be impressed by your slagging off other posters, dozerino-doodle-doo
why not try being nice about people for a whole day?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:19, Reply)

i ent slaggin no one off

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:20, Reply)

go on
say something nice about someone. you know you can do it, if you try.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:21, Reply)

Battered has a lovely arse.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:22, Reply)

given what he posts on here about what comes out of it
I highly doubt that
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:23, Reply)

Rory has a really cool fringe.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:25, Reply)

bit cruel about your fellow slapheed

( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:26, Reply)

Naked ape is a handsome and stand up guy

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:27, Reply)

he's got the haircut of Hugh Grant and the charisma of Piers Morgan.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:28, Reply)

I wish!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:31, Reply)

I've not checked my diary so I dunno, soz
I am tired and hungover.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:20, Reply)

why has my tiny tesco express on high st ken, what i use in late night emergencies and all that
booted out its nice aisle of veggie stuff and replaced it with really random ethnic/exotic foodstuffs? I don't want 15 different flavours of coconut rind, I just want some vegetarian sushi. god.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:23, Reply)

^ first world problem ^

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:23, Reply)

it's important
THEY NO LONGER HAVE ROOM TO STOCK THE RIGHT BRAND OF MAKE-UP WIPES, FFS.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:24, Reply)

bit racist

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:24, Reply)

they should have consulted me
I love those aisles in the big Tesco, you can get really interesting flavours. but not in a tiny one. my stuff is moar important.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:25, Reply)

you should speak to nakers, he's a big deal in FMCG retail
His Tesco have an aisle just for him.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:27, Reply)

Tggi^

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:28, Reply)

i knew i should have stuck with waitrose
but they aren't open until midnight :(
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:29, Reply)

that's an odd time for a shop to open.

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 9:45, Reply)

They are slowly revamping all of their stores
I guess you have lots of immigants in west ken that want coconut rind
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:26, Reply)

i was happy when they brought in the american aisle
lots of exciting ways to put on weight, like peanut butter m&m's. but why did the vegetarian stuff have to be sacrificed? WHY?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:26, Reply)

Because it's against nature, like homosexuality and frog

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:27, Reply)

he is a bit of an unnatural beast

( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:28, Reply)

I heard he has two spines

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:33, Reply)

actually I am spineless

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 9:00, Reply)

How often did you actually buy any of the vegetarian stuff they used to stock?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:30, Reply)

regularly!
at least once a year.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 9:45, Reply)

The usual combination of work and occasionally being a prick on the internet.
When do you start your new job?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:29, Reply)

Monday.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:30, Reply)

Does this mean we only have one more day of you posting after today?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:32, Reply)

Will you stop posting then?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:33, Reply)

I fucking hope so.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:35, Reply)

I think we all do batts I think we all do
Will you stop posting when you got to Dubai?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:37, Reply)

Dunno. I know you'd all like it if I did stop, so I probably won't.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:46, Reply)

With all the gayness in here the Dubai authorities would have you locked up In a Week

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:51, Reply)

That's a good point.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:53, Reply)

I'm aiming for psychochomp levels of procrastination and slacking.
Spending ten hours a day on b3ta and Wikipedia will really impress my new boss at ppiclaimz4u!
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:42, Reply)

Deal with client after client, followed by the most boring fucker coming in to award us more ISO certificates (I think)
Then, I'm going to go home, and drink myself to death.

You know, the usual.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:51, Reply)

Things looking up then?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:52, Reply)

how's the debt mountain?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:56, Reply)

What he wants to do is find £50

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:57, Reply)

what he wants to do is stop reading Kerrang!
And cut his bloody hair.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:58, Reply)

Says the 32 year old facially pierced sk8tr

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 9:00, Reply)

34

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 9:01, Reply)

I just found £50 :)

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:51, Reply)

NO WAY!!!
I just saw a fit ginger!
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:54, Reply)

was is the one of off games or our thrones?

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:59, Reply)

he was dreamy
He looked like that Josh Homme but younger xx
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 9:05, Reply)

Have you got another exciting spreadsheet-based opportunity to go to, or will you be "freelance"?

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 8:59, Reply)

new job
Senior Admin Assistant at ppiclaimz4u
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 9:02, Reply)

Have you turned your back on the leisure centre business forever, then?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 9:04, Reply)

yer
I've pretty much done all that I set out to do, time to move on to PPI claims!
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 9:06, Reply)

Awesome - King Of Paperclips.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 9:07, Reply)

I'm in charge of printer paper!

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 9:09, Reply)

Will you be taking minutes in meetings?
The excitement is palpable!
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 9:13, Reply)

nah, just printing stuff out for people and filling in an Excel spreadsheet.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 9:16, Reply)

I keep thinking this is Friday

( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 9:15, Reply)