I threw up whilst brushing my teeth this morning.
What unpleasantness has befallen you lately?

Alt: Rolf Harris. Not looking too good, is it? What's your verdict?
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:21, 74 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

I saw that picture of Dozer
urgggggggg
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:21, Reply)

Why do you think I threw up whilst brushing my teeth?

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:22, Reply)

Gum cancer?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:23, Reply)

Nah, I decided to brush my tongue a little too vigorously.
Gag reflex kicked in and I promptly lost the two cups of coffee I'd already drank that morning. I gave it an hour to be sure it wasn't a bug, then went to work.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:26, Reply)

alright AA give DG his account back

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:27, Reply)

I don't get this, sorry.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:28, Reply)

because you had a flashback
to the previous night when you found one of his pubes in your teeth?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:24, Reply)

Worst way of flossing EVAH

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:25, Reply)

My last hangover. I reckon I'm just about recovered.
Alt: guilty. Definitely.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:23, Reply)

All of the complainants have similar stories. Odds look a bit stacked.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:24, Reply)

The funny thing is,at our ages one of us must have been nonced up by one them

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:24, Reply)

That's not a funny thing.
Sooty.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:25, Reply)

Where is the clown
when we need a call on funny?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:26, Reply)

Darth's dad was Savile's warm up man on Jim'll Fix It.
I reckon it's Darth.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:27, Reply)

I think It was Darth's dad, anyway.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:27, Reply)

It's definitely someone on here / not on here anymore.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:28, Reply)

Hey it was consensual

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:37, Reply)

But I loved it

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:38, Reply)

One day the stars, next day a full compliment of russain sailors
I'd say his standards are slipping
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:28, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post2294628
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:52, Reply)

lolsa

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:58, Reply)

I do the ol tooth brush vom at least twice a week
I think it means I am a gayer
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:38, Reply)

First time it's happened to me.
I've had more pleasant experiences. Such as YM.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:39, Reply)

She is a minx
Well as much as a corpse can be
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:40, Reply)

^Does Oral B(onzodog29) with GeordieJay.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:40, Reply)

Phwoooaar

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:41, Reply)

alt: he touched me on my glans with his mouth and man cunt :(

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:39, Reply)

Alt. honestly I don't think I can deal with another loved childhood hero being a nonce
I hope it isn't true
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:42, Reply)

two words
Jonny


Ball
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:43, Reply)

and industry please
Rim


job
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:46, Reply)

where did "industry please" come from?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:49, Reply)

I met johnny ball in the early nighties
I was very very pissed and apparently told him i wanted to fuck his daughter
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:46, Reply)

i was at prep school, old man

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:50, Reply)

I remember nothing of this encounter
It was relayed to me. Apparently he was a guest speaker at uni. Just a shame it wasn't Sara cox's dad he would have probably hooked me up
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:52, Reply)

To which he replied 'I can recommend that, she's a top shag'.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:50, Reply)

Hahaha

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:51, Reply)

alright Midge?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:52, Reply)

Pffft.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:57, Reply)

i don't think i get this...

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 20:58, Reply)

This is because you are a "bent spastic".

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 3 Jun 2014, 21:00, Reply)

as we all know from newspaper headlines inverted commas mean something isn't true!
yessssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 21:02, Reply)

It's the noise his arse made as jonny withdrew

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 21:01, Reply)

"Think of a Number"
That'd be 2, then...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 3 Jun 2014, 21:02, Reply)

I met David Bellamy in the 1980's.
Fortunately, at no point did he try to "wummage awound in my undergwowth".
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 3 Jun 2014, 21:03, Reply)

a snail pooed on me earlier

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 21:32, Reply)

+after it chased after me

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 3 Jun 2014, 21:35, Reply)

I was sick on Sunday morning,
It was because of too much booze. I thought I was ready for a pint of orange juice. I was not.

Alt: not guilty.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 4 Jun 2014, 7:54, Reply)