Home sweet home
It's Back to Work Monday for me and countless other drones. The next couple of days promise to be some of the quietest of the year. Which is nice.

Drop in and say allo.


( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 7:42, 56 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Hello!
I'm Happy I'm not the only person back to work today.

It was a bit of a shock getting out of bed this morning. Oh well, at least I have Uncle B3ta's knee to sit on and stay comfortable.

How rude of me. How was your christmas?
( wanderlust, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 7:49, Reply)

My christmas
was wonderful, apart from proper flu :(

And I've just spent three days hanging out with my daughter, which was totally fantastic :)

How was yours?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 8:12, Reply)

Mr Nong
I worked 4 days last week, and I'll be working another 4 this week :(

Christmas was lully though, against expectations, and I managed to pack as much in as it's physically possible to do. I spent it in three different houses then I woke up in Huddersfield on saturday, and had a race against the clock to get to work for 9am!
( warmfuzzies Isn't here, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 8:12, Reply)

@fuzzy.
It sounds like you've been a busy lady then.

@No3L My christmas was better than expected. I slept a lot, got drunk, smoked a lot and played singstar at my friend Holly's flat. Honestly, it was like standing at the gates of heaven listening to the angels sing!
( wanderlust, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 8:18, Reply)

Fuzzy!
:)

I was lucky enough to meet a bloody brilliant piano player a few days ago, and I grabbed my guitar and we jammed it out, me singing and playing my little heart out.

I reckon I could really dig Singstar :)
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 8:23, Reply)

Hi there!
I'm NOT at work until the 5th (Yay me!). Our customers are all shut (except the hospitals) so there's no point me being available to answer technical queries, is there?
However, this long respite does not mean I'll be able to waste my 2 weeks off in a drunken drug-fuelled debauch, oh no! I have:-
3 doors to hang (bifolds).
2 chests of drawers to build.
1 washing machine to plumb in.
1 shower curtain to put in.
1 shower to replace.
1 bath to seal.
1 bathroom to recarpet.

All in between converting another guitar to 7-string and drinking with Pooflake.

I'll be glad to get to work for a rest!
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 8:38, Reply)

Sounds like a day's work to me CP :)
I am the door-swinging KING! I must've swung a few hundred sets of single and double doors in my time *dons flat cap* *lights pipe* *smugs*
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 8:44, Reply)

Morning all
Was wondering if I was the only person in the country silly enough to come in to work today.

This coffee needs to be stronger and more alcoholic.

I forgot to bring my Christmas toys in to play with. I got a monkey with elastic arms and a cape to fire at my boss.

Who brought their toys in?
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 8:50, Reply)

I am lying in bed
contemplating getting up as I have to take Basil the Smug Cat to the vet for a check up.

No work for me until the 15th!
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 8:57, Reply)

I brought my favourite xmas book into work
Reader's Digest 'The most amazing places on Britain's coast'

That makes me sound like a twat, which is partly true :)

Edit: the 15th!? *faints*
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 8:58, Reply)

Morning!
And what a morning... still, I'm trying to sort out a quote for a guy who wants a website doing. A basic image and info upload thing for a house-selling site, which would then be searchable, with some basic kind of captcha technology to prevent spambots. Any ideas as to how much I should charge him?

/genuine question and could do with the advice
( jim_bob can herd cats., Mon 29 Dec 2008, 9:06, Reply)

Ten quid an hour
And aim to be done in twenty hours.

Best way is to do it dirt cheap, then arrange hosting etc yourself, get him set up on a monthly fee to pay for the hosting, a small profit and "support" :)

Regular income FTW!
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 9:11, Reply)

Just break it down and break it down again
Work out all the pieces...forms, db backend, interface to go through the form data, emails, capture...how they fit together and how they fit in to whatever your framework is, then you can start working out how many hours it will take.

Then add on, say, 10-20% more time to be pessimistic on bug fixing and account for time dealing with the client and other general project management, then decide how much you want to be paid per hour. Don't add tooooo much extra time on, but do work out what your minimum hourly rate is, so you can see how far you can afford to go over time.

Hope that helps :-)

(Wish I could live up to that myself or convince others to, would make for much less bitching around here)
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 9:18, Reply)

Am now up and showered
Off to the vet shortly.

Still not returning to work until the 15th
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 9:19, Reply)

I prefer to work for a flat fee
Trouble is, I know bugger all about php/asp... help! He did mention he is willing to pay up to a grand for this.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Mon 29 Dec 2008, 9:19, Reply)

In that case
Subcontract the project and take a percentage :)

Oli's advice is good too. If you don't know the tech, from my experience, don't use a live project as an opportunity to learn - I always hated HAVING to learn something to complete a project. Which is why I dislike ASP :)
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 9:27, Reply)

Hmm, that's a bit tough then
If you're uploading info, chopping it up into a relational DB and writing a search frontend for it on the site, you kinda need some kind of server side scripting.

What do you usually use for your sites?

PHP is easy enough if you know any other languages already. You'll have fewer hosting problems than with ASP (/flame invite ;-) )

There's a few frameworks out there which can help you. I roll my own, so I can't really suggest anything there (and mine isn't mature enough for release yet)
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 9:29, Reply)

Right... who can give me a quote then?
Minus say... 10% finder's fee? Remember I know bugger all about databases and so forth. I really need to learn.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Mon 29 Dec 2008, 9:31, Reply)

Not I
I got out of the game years ago. That said, I'm slinging together a couple of Web sites atm, but nothing fancy.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 9:33, Reply)

wooooork
im at work, hungover, tired and bored!

Still, in 6½ hours and I can go back to bed

Happy 29th everybody
(Halfy By light alone, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 9:38, Reply)

Can you give us more to go on?
You say it's a whole site...nothing there atm. Is there a design?

Who can upload? - Is it members only? Is the property categorised + searchable by area etc? What does the rest of the site look like? What happens when someone sees a house they like?

You might be talking about something quite big here, I'm not sure. A grand is pretty cheep for something this, and would only get a couple of days of my company's time... Might be able to do something myself, just need to find some spare time from somewhere :-)

No3l's right...maintenance contracts are good (and necessary), and this would definitely need one.
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 9:45, Reply)

Back at work
But after such a shitty Christmas it actually feels like a good place to be.

Bah Humbug.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 9:53, Reply)

Well
It would be a members only gig to upload and search, to keep information nice and confidential. The guy in question didn't give me much but I am having to flesh this out as I go. I'd say the upload form would have a browse box for the image, content boxes for the information (with validation checkers), and the layout itself would have a banner across the top with links down the side, easy enough to code in css I would imagine. I think the man in question is looking for a quote... so would £2k be more appropriate? And yes, it would be categorised by area. In fact, yes to all the questions. I am having to work this out as I go, rather a lot of hard work. Thanks for the help with this, much appreciated. And if any of you want the work, I can put you in touch with the man in question.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Mon 29 Dec 2008, 10:03, Reply)

woooooo
Back at work but just for today, I start back proper next Monday. It's like a ghost office though which is kinda cool.

wanderlust - I've just this second ordered a bluetooth usb dongle thingy. The photos will be coming off my phone soonish.
( djtrialprice, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 10:13, Reply)

@djtrialprice
Would those be the lovely photos of me grooming you?
( wanderlust, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 10:41, Reply)

Is djtrialprice
secretly a horse?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 10:46, Reply)

That would be the one
Me looking all cute with my plaited pigtails being groomed by your dominating peedo self.
( djtrialprice, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 10:48, Reply)

Is djtrialprice secretly a horse?
Naaaaay. *ba doom tish*

Thanks folks I'll be here all week (except I won't - I'm going back home to Scotland yay!)

Try the lobster.
( djtrialprice, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 10:50, Reply)

*laughs*
*grooms*

*rubs thighs*

*dominates*
( wanderlust, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 10:52, Reply)

*acquiesces*
( djtrialprice, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 11:02, Reply)

I think I should be quiet now
I'm worried people may think I'm so kind of deviant.

Which of course I'm not. ahem
( wanderlust, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 11:18, Reply)

I'd love to stop being quiet myself
*muffle* if you could just give me a hand taking the gag from my mouth...
( djtrialprice, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 11:28, Reply)

I've told you before.
I'll remove the gag when you learn to behave.

*spanks*
( wanderlust, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 11:37, Reply)

ancrenne!
*glees*

*cuddles*

*kisses*

*ladyloves*

Give DG and the sweary one a huge cuddle from me.
( wanderlust, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 11:41, Reply)

MOOOOOORRRRRNNNNNIINNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGG!













Alright then?
( thealternativefact, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 11:43, Reply)

CLLLLEEENNNDRIIIXX!!!
*jumps on*

*cuddles*

*motorboats*
( wanderlust, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 11:47, Reply)

Morning chaps.
Fancy seeing you here.

I am at work.

*glums*
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 11:48, Reply)

hi ancrenne, clendrix, wookiee
I'm learning to behave ¬_¬
( djtrialprice, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 11:49, Reply)

Morning!
just...

popping in quickly to say hello to you fine people, but we shall be off soon to show ancrenne the delights of Northern life.

Like whippets, neglected industry, poverty and stottie cake. It's grim oop north, ye knaaa.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 29 Dec 2008, 11:50, Reply)

*enjoys motorboating so much, engine blows*
Lusters! Ancrenne! Other gorgeous people of the board!

I'm not at work but I thought I'd pop in to say hi :)
( thealternativefact, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 11:50, Reply)

ello DG and wookie.
I'm bored of work today. So nothing new there really.

I feel like running away somewhere hot and drinking cocktails.
( wanderlust, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 11:54, Reply)

Somewhere hot.
My bed was the nicest it's ever been this morning. I was honestly considering seriously injuring myself so that I could stay at home until I realised I'd have to get out of it to ring in anyway.

On the bright side, I'm off to Subway.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 11:57, Reply)

Just nipping in to say I'm fucking ill again.
Grrrrrrr!

Now it's the shits and dizzy spells.


Luckily I'm not back at work till the 5th.
( girlinthehole, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 12:17, Reply)

Hey bgb
Hope you feel better matey :)
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 12:32, Reply)

Thanks No3L
Hopefully it's just a 24 hour thing but this is the 2nd time in 2 weeks I've had this.

I've got stuff to do for God's sake. I don't want to sit in the house all day being delicate.

Bugger!
( girlinthehole, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 12:56, Reply)

Ah, norovirus
A very good way of getting a 5 day weekend if you time it right. I've had it a few times, and it isn't pleasant. Especially when the thunderbox earns its' name all too literally when you're liberally and noisily redecorating it from both ends.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Mon 29 Dec 2008, 13:25, Reply)

Hello All
I hope you all had a lovely Christmas.

My hot water tank sprung a leak, which was not my idea of a good time!
( Mrs Entity is in hiding., Mon 29 Dec 2008, 13:26, Reply)

*yawns*
*stretches*

Morning guys. No work for me until the 5th so I've only just got out of bed. I really should be getting up earlier and doing things but, quite frankly, I'm enjoying being a lazy git.

Going to see the panto that my sister is in tonight. Pantos
( Captain V, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 13:32, Reply)

@PB
I don't think it's the norovirus. It's only coming out one end.

I'm now helping my nephew build a balsa wood pirate ship. Woo!
( girlinthehole, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 14:46, Reply)

That's for the best then
But can anyone answer me this- why do I find the idea of someone suffering from a bad case of the shits incredibly funny?

Incidentally I do feel sympathetic at the same time...
( jim_bob can herd cats., Mon 29 Dec 2008, 14:55, Reply)

'fternoon
@PB: Maybe it's because you've never had a bad case of the shits before. I once had a 7 week case of the shits. Fortunately, me and my friend coped by learning to see the funny side.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 15:34, Reply)

7 weeks?
Bloody hell, that's just epic! I think it's the noise that gets me- like some fart-sounding shit cannon. Prrrrrrrrrrrapp-apapap-thrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrp-prap-prip-squeak!

I worry myself sometimes. Typing the noises of someone in acute intestinal discomfort on the internet must be a new low.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Mon 29 Dec 2008, 15:52, Reply)

@PB
Well we get to meet at the end of January in York. You can imagine me making those noises much better when seen in the flesh.

*shames*
( girlinthehole, Mon 29 Dec 2008, 15:56, Reply)

It seems Mme BGB
You've found my magical giggle button. That, and fart jokes, of course. And any jokes about gonad glue.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Mon 29 Dec 2008, 15:57, Reply)