Predictive Text
I have managed to never buy a mobile phone in my life. Admittedly I'm only 23, and avoided getting one until I was 17, but they've always been hand-me-downs. (The first being forced upon me when my sister decided hers wasn't sufficiently fashionably, and my mother insisted that I'd find it useful, despite not having anybody to call.)

Now, with my current phone, its settings meant that it was easier to work out how to use predictive text than to switch it off. And in the end, I have found that it speeds things up quite a lot.

However, given this phone had originally been owned by my friend's sister, then passed on to him, and then finally on to me, I was most surprised that I had to teach it the word "Fucking."

Since then, I've had to teach it various other, shall we say, more creative expletives, including
Dickwobbler
Arsebiscuits
Cockdonkey
Badgerflaps
Cuntybollocks
Arsetrumpetry

What interesting or unusual words have you had to teach your phone? And will you also teach them to your children?
(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:55, 26 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Can't be dealing with predictive text
so short answer, None.
(b3tamax Mate, you're fat and I'll throw you in the river, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:05, Reply)

Well, you're no fun, are you?

(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:06, Reply)

.
:/

Especially for you I have just turned on predictive text and taught the phone "boringcunt"
(b3tamax Mate, you're fat and I'll throw you in the river, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:11, Reply)

I use predictive text
but I don't like teaching it new words, there's something oddly satifying about having to type out the word cunt.

On a related note, I forgot to top up last month, so my unlimited text thingy hasn't kicked in. I've only got 90 texts left this month, it's gay.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:14, Reply)

I don't use predictive text
Because I am a 38 year old techno luddite who just finds it confusing.

Plus, like Bert, I find there is something oddly satisfying about spelling out rude words yourself whilst grinning like a mong.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:21, Reply)

Don't compare yourself to me, granddad
I can programme a VCR, use double-sided sellotape and predictive text, because I'm down with the kids.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:22, Reply)

Be Careful!
Make sure you don't use predictive text for dirty messaging, no girl likes to hear how you'll "Kick her wet puppy/aunt"
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:24, Reply)

funny you should say that
I was sending a threatening message to someone, detailing what I was planning to do to their relatives, and bloody predictive text made it come out as "I'm going to lick your cunt"
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:29, Reply)

Well, I'd feel threatened by that
I hear you have a tongue like coarse sandpaper...
(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:36, Reply)

it has been known to start fires with friction

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:38, Reply)

I already have enough of a fire down there
What with the thrush and all...
(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:38, Reply)

I had to teach mine
Fucksocks
Mimpy
Fucking
Fucker
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:38, Reply)

Wossa mimpy?

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:39, Reply)

Since I surf b3ta on my phone
My predictive text now knows a lot of usernames, and also "spacktards".
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:40, Reply)

Can anyone tell me
why my iPhone always wants to correct Fucking to Fuching?

WTF is Fuching? and do I want to know?
(bill, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:56, Reply)

iPhones are shit at learning words apparently
They seem to censor all the swearwords!

Apparently the hack is to save a contact in your address book with the words it refuses to learn, cos all the contact names get added to the predictive text.
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:58, Reply)

when I lived in Cardiff my phone offer Barehee as the only word
now, correct me if I am wrong, but that is not a word or even part of a word, and should therefore not be in a fucking dictionary.

edit: Sam, that is fucking gay. It should be up to the user what they have in their dictionary. Fucking Apple, bunch of wankers.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:59, Reply)

Not interesting...
...or particularly unusual, but my old T610 could display a list of added words, something lacking in my subsequent handsets. I had to teach:
prawn
rambunctious (which Firefox doesn't seem to know either, having that in common with its own name)
snorkel
...and a number of others I don't recall. I feel that these words, being in the dictionary and all, should perhaps come with the phone. Come installed on the phone, that is; not be provided as a freebie.
(ThomsonsPier consumes, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:00, Reply)

Yep
If you don't want to do things in The One True Way that Apple dictates, you're out of luck!

I wrote a text on an iPhone a week or two ago, it took me about half an hour and I very nearly stamped it into tiny pieces.

I got Barehed for Cardiff I think not barehee - it will try and guess I think, you can often get combinations that aren't words where it's obviously trying to make its best guess.

@ ThomsonsPier - I have the full OED at home. It takes up about 5' of shelving. Expecting a phone to know every word, ever is a bit optimistic even in these days of large amounts of storage. Remember it will also have T9 dictionaries for several other languages! Having to add them the first time you use them isn't exactly much hassle really...
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:04, Reply)

SoSIA
So I'll have to teach my phone "Mangeur de merde" as well?
(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:08, Reply)

@Son of Sam-i-am
They're not exactly unusual words, though. Well, maybe the middle one.
(ThomsonsPier consumes, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:44, Reply)

I give you
predictive sex text for seductive sexeh talk such as:

suck my coal
shove it up my apse
caress my bombs
and (my personal favourite): Dual my aunt, then stop my chocolate pubs dish.
( warmfuzzies Isn't here, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:46, Reply)

I use my phone to browse b3ta
therefore my added dictionary is colourful to say the least.

Cack, bastard, Cheeky, bitch, chuff, blag, bollocks, bong, crap, crappy, cunt, cuppa, damn, farting, feck, dick, doodle, dossing, fuck, fucked, fuckers, fucking, fucks, gaggle, gazzes, HREF, kitten, Loon, miffed, noob, penis, shit, shitty, pimp, piss, pissed, pissing, pissy, pussy, sodding, snot, spunk, spunky, tits, tossmonger, wank, wanked, wanker, wanky, whore, wtf, TGB

Best not to read that as a sentence - it doesn't end well for our badger.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:53, Reply)

If you try to type 'smirnoff' in, it'll come up 'poisoned'.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 13:16, Reply)

Thanks Fuzzy
That site is utterly awesome and I'm now getting some odd looks at work.
(b3tamax Mate, you're fat and I'll throw you in the river, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 13:23, Reply)

I'm just perpetuating the b3ta goodness
Listopia was linked in a newsletter aaaages and ages ago and has been in my favourites ever since :)
( warmfuzzies Isn't here, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 14:50, Reply)