typos
have just found a 1983 statutory instrument (like a baby act of parliament) that refers to companies being stripped of their "asses" instead of "assets".

also i am going to the cinema tonight. managed to type "coo, i am excited!" instead of "cool". so now i sound like one of the famous five.

and a colleague when i was an estate agent managed to type "classic propertities" instead of "properties".

what amusing typos have you come across in your line of work? and if none, who would you rather shag, al or bert?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 4 Mar 2009, 17:23, 14 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I despair
I've just read and filled in a schools application for Emily (my G/F's daughter) which read "Please indicate your prefered school".
This form was issued by......wait for it........the local education authority!

I crossed out "prefered", corrected it to "preferred" and put the comment "2/10 see me" at the bottom in red ink.
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Wed 4 Mar 2009, 17:36, Reply)

An extensive valuation report of a pub.

It had a Saloon Bar and Pubic Bar.
(lordofallhesurveys How appropriate you fight like a cow, Wed 4 Mar 2009, 17:49, Reply)

al
No, Bert.

No, hang on, al.

Fuck it I'd do 'em both
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 4 Mar 2009, 17:58, Reply)

Not so much a typo...
But everyone, including the police dept, attorneys and the judges abbreviates "Assault" as "Ass"...

"Possession of a Dangerous Drug" becomes "Dang Drug".
"Deadly Conduct" becomes "Dead Con"
"Sexual Assault" becomes "Sex Ass"
"Assaulting a Public Servant" becomes "Ass Cop"
"Murder / Manslaughter" becomes "Murder Man"
"Public Lewdness" becomes "Pub Lewd"

...and one of the computer programs we use is named "PIS" (prounounced 'piss')


Does that count?
( flirting with badgers What? It sounded good at the time., Wed 4 Mar 2009, 18:01, Reply)

My favourite
was when I was at school, during the teachers' strike of the 1980s. As we got on the buses to go home, the more militant teachers were giving us leaflets to take home to our parents, explaining their cause and pointing out that it would not do us any good to lose out on our education if the teachers were on strike because of the government's attitude, or whatever.

The leaflet contained the line:

"What will be the affect on your child's education?"

Edit - Al. Not Bert. Too hirsute.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 4 Mar 2009, 18:45, Reply)

Got to be Al.
I think Bert is short isn't he?
( girlinthehole, Wed 4 Mar 2009, 19:03, Reply)

I'm such a nerd...
... A couple of months ago I found a typo in the Shorter Oxford English Dictionary.

Can't remember what it was, but - yay me.
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Wed 4 Mar 2009, 19:11, Reply)

oh, enzyme.

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 4 Mar 2009, 19:20, Reply)

In my mind...
... you're saying that in such a seductive tone...

;)
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Wed 4 Mar 2009, 19:23, Reply)

seductive pitying...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 4 Mar 2009, 19:48, Reply)

just got an email
from a comedy site - contained the following line:
'It will be a mostly new show and the first time that Simon has formerly performed outdoors. '

And microsoft word always changes mr vitamin's name to 'arousal' (his name ends in 'slav', and in no way looks like the word arousal). It made my thesis acknowledgements look, um, interesting.

(oh, and definitely Al)
( ascorbate, Wed 4 Mar 2009, 19:55, Reply)

Back in the 80s
I saw this advert advertising a teaching position. They tried to say "Excellent career prospects" but misspelled 'career' as 'cancer'.

Re Al vs Bert:
Hmmmm... Tricky that one. I think I'll sew the two of them together but leave a gap somewhere and just shag the gap.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Wed 4 Mar 2009, 20:22, Reply)

From the IT helpdesk monkeys a while back

customer has a failed hard dick


That was printed out and framed
(Stringy, Wed 4 Mar 2009, 20:40, Reply)

Short?!
Fucking short?! I'll have you know that I'm 5'10", 5'11" of you believe my doctor, and 6'2" in heels.

Bunch of cunts, the lot of yer. Correct about the hairyness though, and I'm skinny as a rake too.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 5 Mar 2009, 9:40, Reply)