Fuck me, but old people, eh ?
I'm currently looking after my grandmother - poor old dear is 95 and unsurprisingly going downhill fast.

Old age isn't a battle, it's a war, with more and more bits of one's dignity / sanity getting eroded each time, with no prospect of it getting anything but worse.

On that basis, how old would you like to be when you die ?

I think another 20 years on this planet would be enough for me, which would mean me carking it at 61. And that's not young - it's just early enough to miss the worst bits of getting old.

So when do you want to check out, and if it's "when I'm really old" how do you think you'll dodge the bullets of infirmity and decrepitude (apols for length)
( I_Was_Mordred, Mon 20 Apr 2009, 20:27, 37 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I don't care when I die as long as it's a complete surprise when it happens.
Since hitting 40 I have however been trying to live a healthy lifestyle but that is more about quality of life rather than longevity.
( girlinthehole, Mon 20 Apr 2009, 20:36, Reply)

I'll just add this to make more sense of the original post
My grandmother used to be a very capable and (in her own way) quite powerful woman. Think Mrs Thatcher and you're not far wrong...

...now she has become Mrs Brady, Old Lady (the Viz character, a stereotype of old people who fuss too much and talk bollocks).

Really, there's no need for her to be around any more. She's got nothing to look forward to except death, she knows this and is understandably depressed.

Me seeing her like this is making me smoke, drink and eat for England just to ensure I never get to her age !

Just wondering what other B3tan's views are on this subject, if of course it's ever entered your heads...
( I_Was_Mordred, Mon 20 Apr 2009, 20:40, Reply)

I reckon
It is much more to do with how self dependent you are and the preservation of your mental health than anything, presuming you stay nice and healthy.

You see people at 75 or so plus, who are almost totally independent, fit as a fiddle and a good laugh too with their crazy old stories.

So I'd love to make it that far but if I start shitting myself at 61 and failing to recognise those closest to me then just euthanise me then please :)
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Mon 20 Apr 2009, 20:41, Reply)

well
My mortgage will be paid off by the time i'm 60, so as long as I have a nice young woman to look after me I can limp along for a few more years to enjoy the fruits of retirement.

However if the screws fall out please recycle me before im a drain on nationel resources
(Halfy By light alone, Mon 20 Apr 2009, 21:05, Reply)

Mmmm, I don't know about this one
A large part of me wants to say life can still be good up to 75 or so and you can't complain about dying then if you are lucky to make it that far.

However, if I make it to 74 I'm pretty damn sure I won't be as flippant about dying at 75.
( GarbageFan didn't know what to have as a board sig on, Mon 20 Apr 2009, 21:24, Reply)

i can't actually answer this at the moment, but...
after having my suspisions for about 9 months or so...
6 weeks ago i found out that my mother (72) has been diagnosed with parkinson's disease.
FUCK.
that is all :-(
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Mon 20 Apr 2009, 21:24, Reply)

@blaireau
A diagnosis of Parkinson's isn't necessarily that terrible- my dad has it, and he manages it pretty well. It depends on how young she is and how severe a case she has.

As for how I'll go... most likely I'll live to an evil old age and slowly go out like my grandmother did. I seem to have a remarkably tough body with high metabolism and very good health that's resisting age pretty nicely so far. Barring any accidents or unexpected disease, I'll probably be around to bury the lot of you.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Mon 20 Apr 2009, 21:28, Reply)

I suspect
Whether we want to be buried or not. Hopefully I'll be dead when you get round to it.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Tue 21 Apr 2009, 8:39, Reply)

@ ancrenne: thanks x but you still owe me a pint of gin...
@trl: my ma is 72 and the last year has seen a very noticable decline.

i visit most days, this afternoon i sat in my van and cried 1/2 a mile down the road. bollocks.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Mon 20 Apr 2009, 21:41, Reply)

Well I don't know about you lot, but I plan to be immortal.
I have the liquid lunch and two rubber bands. All I need is an irrational particle accelerator and a smaaaaaaaaaaaaaaall aubergine!
( jim_bob can herd cats., Mon 20 Apr 2009, 21:42, Reply)

just thought of this...
any of you buggers know the poem "let me die a young man's death" by roger mcgough?
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Mon 20 Apr 2009, 21:43, Reply)

In itself it isn't fatal
but is degenerative, with it taking up to 20 years to lead to fatal complications.

If she's just been diagnosed at 72, she's likely got a lot of years left. Dad was diagnosed a couple of years ago, and can still walk three miles a day easily- and he's 80 now!

Oh and as for the original question: I'll probably not dodge the slings and arrows of old age. It's more a question of how badly they'll bother me when they hit. I'll probably deal with them with the same humor I've dealt with my other physical limitations.

EDIT: I've changed my mind. I came into this world naked and screaming and covered in someone else's blood, and I intend to go out the same way.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Mon 20 Apr 2009, 21:50, Reply)

I'll be happy to die
when important bits of me stop working.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 20 Apr 2009, 21:53, Reply)

i want to die in my late 70's after seeing my children grow up happy
and getting to know my grandchildren as people rather than little kids

if i go in my sleep all to the good. If i live to see my 80th birthday i'm going to be very pissed off
( mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 20 Apr 2009, 22:28, Reply)

Depends
My great Aunt and Uncle came up for our wedding party last week. They're both in the 90s and about to celebrate their 60th wedding anniversary; still travel and apart from a bit of arthritis and slightly dodgy hearing are in good health.

I wouldn't want to go too young; at the same time I don't want to end up a dribbling burden.

I'm reminded of Sylvester McCoy, whose Gran reached 100 only to find that she had outlived all of her friends and most of her family. Had never drank or smoked in her life and took both up with gusto. Lasted another 3 months...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 20 Apr 2009, 22:46, Reply)

there's another poem in my mind...
probably mcgough or one of his cronies...

"when people ask me how i am
i say "bits of me are fine"
and they are...**wavey lines**
...bits of me i'd be proud to take out and show off in public"
etc.

check out both of those poems please, they have helped me in times of need.

i read "let me die a young man's death" to a small (but perfectly formed) crowd after the funeral of my dear friend mike. they cried, they laughed, they cried and laughed again.

i know that the parkinson's most likely won't be the actual cause of my mother's death. today she asked me what PD actually is and i spent a while explaining what i know. it hurt. to tell ones own mother how things will break down like that? no wonder i needed a pint when i got home.

cheers ancrenne, good to know i have a pal! get saving cos my gin of choice is Hendrick's...
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Mon 20 Apr 2009, 22:58, Reply)

nah dude, i is all of teh classy!
btw saw the pics of your leg-bruise incident...
cracking pins, lovely shorts but blimey, that bruise was a corker!!
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Mon 20 Apr 2009, 23:13, Reply)

just shows i didn't spend ages perving over the pics...
quality injury!

it was nice to have a person to picture for future ref etc.

mistaspakkaman came to visit last week, now i know what 5 b3tans look like (not including myself).

anyway, i'm off upstairs to wake up my better half...

feel better for getting some parent-related stuff off my chest, hugs and kisses goodnight XXX
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Mon 20 Apr 2009, 23:19, Reply)

X
and indeed XXX
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Mon 20 Apr 2009, 23:22, Reply)

I'm in my early 30s
and I'll be surprised if I hit 40, I'm pretty fucking decrepit already. Live fast, die young eh?

Plus, being old looks shit. I've never wanted to be old.
(username1, Tue 21 Apr 2009, 8:56, Reply)

one of the old chaps in my parents old village had parkinson's
they* implanted a chip in his back with a remote control that almost completely controlled his shakes and stuff.

how cool is that?



*not my parents, some doctors
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 21 Apr 2009, 8:58, Reply)

Still looking forward to dying in a way.
As I've said before, knowing that all this will end is a comforting thought. One day it is certain that you will be just tired of being alive, every day will be a chore and your decrepitude will only increase. It is then that the comforting bit comes in. I have no desire to last for ages. As soon as my quality of life is impaired to a major extent I'll want to be gone.

Then again shot in bed at age 95 by a jealous lover would be good.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Tue 21 Apr 2009, 9:09, Reply)

hmmm
I would like to be around for at least another 40 years thanks...and even then I'd like to keep on going for a while after that. I don't want to die from loneliness (like my beloved nanna did, a few short months after her husband, my pop died during his sleep), but preferably quick. A car accident or a shot to the head would be best.
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 21 Apr 2009, 9:25, Reply)

What a lovely bright and cheery
thing to read to start my Tuesday morning!


Oh well whilst I'm here....
I would like to live for as long as possible, but without being a burden on those around me.
Its the curiousity of what comes next that intrigues me....
(TheColonel, Tue 21 Apr 2009, 9:44, Reply)

"Its the curiousity of what comes next that intrigues me...."
You decompose and rot into the soil.

It's a fairly well understood process by now.
(username1, Tue 21 Apr 2009, 9:56, Reply)

Sez you.
That is your article of faith. No-one knows what comes next. Only the dead can know. Anything else is just supposition or self-delusion.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Tue 21 Apr 2009, 10:14, Reply)

You'd have to be a bit gullible
to believe there's an afterlife based on what some twats wrote in an old book though, wouldn't you?

I mean, whatever next!
( chart cat has an itch, Tue 21 Apr 2009, 10:36, Reply)

Not the point.
My point is that you can no more say there is nothing after death then you can say there is something after death. Both are articles of faith as neither have empirical proof. Yet.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Tue 21 Apr 2009, 10:51, Reply)

without wanting to be too pedantic
"You decompose and rot into the soil." this is exactly what happens (unless you are cremated)

something else may happen to your (for want of a better word) soul, but that wasn't strictly what username1 said ;-)
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 21 Apr 2009, 10:52, Reply)

Exactly Vipros
The fact that you decompose and rot into the soil is, well, a fact. Don't believe me? Go and kill someone (or an animal if you don't fancy life in prison, or can't think of anyone you dislike enough), bury them in your garden, and dig them up at regular intervals. You will observe this for yourself. This can certainly be proved empirically in this fashion; it's far from 'an article of faith'.

The debate about whether anything additional happens to your 'soul' (as V said, for want of a better word), is additional to this. Personally I believe the laws of thermodynamics seem to preclude anything further happening, but I won't bore you with my typical rant on said subject.
(username1, Tue 21 Apr 2009, 11:01, Reply)

Hope you're right
Cos I've been a right cunt in my time.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Tue 21 Apr 2009, 11:28, Reply)

I've not been a right cunt
but not because I feared going to hell or anything like that, but because I like the thought that I've made life at least a little more bearable for people around me. When the time comes I won't have many regrets, hopefully.

I agree with porkylips- either view is a leap of faith, but we don't have any empirical proof in either direction. Enzyme and I have had this argument in regards to the existence of God and he's gotten quite irritated with me. *laugh* (And no, Enzyme, I'm not looking to re-open that debate.)
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Tue 21 Apr 2009, 13:17, Reply)