where oh where
has Bert gone??

I need his bitching to keep me from going on a rampage.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 24 May 2009, 4:32, 27 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Do your worst...
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Sun 24 May 2009, 5:45, Reply)

good afternoon VC
I'm afraid I won't be rude to you; how are you?
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Sun 24 May 2009, 6:23, Reply)

tired
and in need of bert's cuntish behaviour so I can pretend to be mad at him so I can get a laugh.

But other then that - yeah good. Just finished roasting some garlic and rosemary spiced red onions to go with tea tonight. nom nom nom.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 24 May 2009, 6:36, Reply)

I think he got banned again
Then just gave up posting after that.

I shall try though, you twunting twatbadger. Why are you so nice to everyone? It's not needed!

Not very good at this cuntary malarky. Those onions sound great.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Sun 24 May 2009, 6:49, Reply)

banned again?
banned again implies there was a first time?
you can get banned from here?

I need more info
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Sun 24 May 2009, 7:04, Reply)

I've only been an occasional observer
I think he's been banned twice before? Not sure. One of the more regular people will know more than I will.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Sun 24 May 2009, 7:09, Reply)

yes he's been naughty stepped once before I think
but ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. need his cuntyness.

you folks are fucking useless at being cunts - you're too nice to pull it off - no offence.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 24 May 2009, 7:12, Reply)

Sadly true
/hangs head in shame

We just cannot come to the level of Bert. Give me half an hour and I might be able to think up long and insulting. But my heart won't be in it to throw insults to someone as lovely as you.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Sun 24 May 2009, 7:16, Reply)

you coat hanger sucking nonce.
I'm as lovely as the wicked witch of the west on her rags.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 24 May 2009, 7:18, Reply)

Ahh, piss off you cheese cloth wearing oaf
You as nice as mother fucking Teresa when she's got her extra nice had on and has been given a jolly good rodgering the nice before - you're as bad as fooling any of us as we are.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Sun 24 May 2009, 7:22, Reply)

I need a good rodgering actually.
/counts down days..
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 24 May 2009, 7:35, Reply)

Yes, well
The less said about that, the better, hmm?
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Sun 24 May 2009, 7:37, Reply)

like fuck.
is there any possible way? is there like fuck.

hows things with the missus?
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 24 May 2009, 7:38, Reply)

Been better
Had a bit of an arguement last night because I didn't call her straight after the meeting yesterday. And then refused to tell her in minute detail about it last night. We'll sort ourselves out though.

I only said don't talk about it so we don't have to think about your huge flaps slapping around like an 80 year old's mouth with a Werthers Original.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Sun 24 May 2009, 7:41, Reply)

and there's my mental image quota for today filled in one.
/bokes.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 24 May 2009, 7:49, Reply)

Why, thankyew
I aim to please. I take it all is going well between you and yours?

Also: eyeballs.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Sun 24 May 2009, 7:53, Reply)

yaaaaaaaaaarghhhh you sick sick fucker.
And yes it's all swimmingly except for the one, teensy, tiny little obvious flaw.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 24 May 2009, 8:10, Reply)

There is that.
Start swimming.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Sun 24 May 2009, 8:11, Reply)

I don't fancy being chomped through my midsection
by a Jaws-esque monster.
I'll wait and fly in a metal tube thanks.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 24 May 2009, 8:13, Reply)

Don't worry about jaws
The blubber surrounding your mid section will just amke it bounces off.

Ok, no more insults now. I'm not Bert and trying to be so will just make me look more like a tit
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Sun 24 May 2009, 8:14, Reply)

Yeah cos I have *so much blubber* I'm in danger of making the planet swing out of orbit!

(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 24 May 2009, 8:16, Reply)

I did wonder what that wobble was
Never seen you though, so I can't really comment.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Sun 24 May 2009, 8:25, Reply)

profile mate.
:)
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 24 May 2009, 8:34, Reply)

My Screen!
It cannot cope with the siiiiiize!
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Sun 24 May 2009, 8:36, Reply)

Be careful
or Al will turn up and make snide remarks about foreign dole-scroungers.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Sun 24 May 2009, 9:00, Reply)

I don't really care much about Al when he's in that mood
I just put him on ignore until he's finished.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 24 May 2009, 9:13, Reply)

I miss him too
He was a right twat, but he made me laugh sometimes!

I wonder what you have to do around here to get banned? There's some real arseholes who never seem to disappear and then others who do. Perhaps they email them in charge calling them gaysers or something.
(The Apeface Cherub is not a cunty-uber-cunt, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:58, Reply)