Sex.
And real ale.

I lead an exciting life, me...
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:43, 3 replies, latest was 17 years ago)

This
Works well for me.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:49, Reply)

Actually, the more I think about it
the more it seems like a good idea. Regular sex would keep us all happy and healthy, and, historically, real ale drinkers are friendlier and more easy-going than lager swillers. Perhaps if we sat the Israelis and the Palestinians down over a barrel of mild or bitter they'd all relax a bit and realise it wasn't worth squabbling and perhaps they could share after all. (Don't think the pork scratchings would go down too well though...)
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:53, Reply)

Yeah, the Saudis too!
Wait, what?
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:55, Reply)

Agreed.
Bunch of miserable cunts, the Saudis.

EDIT: Road Map to Peace = Pub Crawl to "You're My Best Mate"
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:21, Reply)

They shot Frank Gardiner.
I LOVE Frank Gardiner.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:23, Reply)

Yep
Despite the attacks of September 11th 2001 the US still sucks the cock of Saudi oil. Instead of bombing the crap out of the wasteland that is Afghanistan, they should've been bombing the crap out of Saudi Arabia
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:27, Reply)

I vote for this
Get both parties along to a real ale festival.

Instead of building walls, they can invest in universal CAMRA memberships for Palestinian and Israeli citizens.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:56, Reply)

The Gaza Strip Beer Festival
Sod the "road map to peace," this is a far better idea. Yes, I know Muslims don't drink, but perhaps it would help them relax a bit in that heat. All this business of foregoing sex and alcohol is just going to lead to pent-up aggression - it's no wonder they're all so angry. _{Nothing to do with having your homeland invaded, of course...}
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:10, Reply)

I like this.
Depending on the ale.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:50, Reply)

Hopback Summer Lightning or Woodford's Wherry?

(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:51, Reply)

Need samples.

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:56, Reply)

Moorhouse Black Cat or Freeminer Deep Shaft?

(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:54, Reply)

Dunno.
My favourite is Bath Ales' Wild Hare. And I've been buying lots of the Badger ones recently - they're fantastic. I realise they may not be remotely hardcore enough for Real Ale enthusiasts but I like 'em. Also, I am a girl - can't manage whole pints of ale.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:57, Reply)

Not hardcore enough?
I disagree. My favourite beers are not necessarily the really rare ones* (a lot of the rarer ones are actually a bit disappointing), and I've long been a fan of the Bath brewery. As for Badger, there are times I've come off a walk round some remote godforsaken part of Kent and thought I'd like nothing better than a good pint of Badger Best**.

*_{Though admittedly the Deep Shaft is one of the best stouts I've ever tasted and I've only been able to find it in beer shops in Gloucester
**Or First Gold, or whatever it's called these days...}
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:07, Reply)

Sex.
And real ale rosé wine.

/runs
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:08, Reply)

Wel, we've got to be inclusive, I suppose.
"Hail to the ale, and a-welcome the wine (for the ladies)"
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:11, Reply)

Doesn't everyone hate rosé though?
Blossom Hill, how I love thee.

Not had a drink in aaaaages. :(
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:14, Reply)

Admittedly, I'm more into red
But I realise there's a place for rosé - particularly in the summer. And when you're staggering into the cornershop in the middle of the night for an urgent re-stock, a cheap rosé is usually a safer bet than a cheap white.
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:16, Reply)

What about those of us that dislike Ale AND wine
Where is my grown up apple juice?!
( Captain V, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:21, Reply)

There's room for cider and perry in my UN beer fest

(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:22, Reply)

Good stuff
Time for a pint of Old Rosie :)

If only.
( Captain V, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:26, Reply)

Faucett Inn Cider?

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:22, Reply)

Cider drinker?
Sorry, I've got into the CAMRA habit of just referring to "real ale" but actually meaning "real ale and cider." Your fermented apples are more than welcome.

As is anybody who wants to bring a mead stand to our global Beer Festival.
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:23, Reply)

What's the difference between ale and real ale?
Not just a facetious question. I genuinely don't know.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:24, Reply)

Without splitting too many hairs
It refers to the way it's served.

"Real ale," or "cask ale" is served from a cask. After it did its initial fermentation, it was put into the cask to mature, and it is not filtered, pasteurised or subject to any chemical alteration. The brewers usually drop in some sort of isinglass or Irish moss to drag down some of the sediment, and after that it is shipped to the pub in the same state. It's basically still "alive" when it's poured and drunk - which is why you have to be careful if you get the cloudy pint near the bottom of the cask as it's full of dead yeast.

There are several beers which call themselves ales - e.g., John Smith's, Tetley's Smoothflow, modern-day Boddington's - which are treated and stuffed into a pressurised lager-style keg. They're boiled, filtered and gassed with Nitrogen and some extra CO₂, often with some additives to make them creamier. Whilst this means your keg of bitter doesn't go off or go silty near the bottom, anybody with any taste can tell you that the treatment process completely ruins the character of the beer.

Sorry, went off on one slightly there...
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:31, Reply)

I'm learning new things every day
Unfortunately, I'm NOT learning how to decline verbs.

Ah well.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:34, Reply)

Just keep thinking of that cold bottle of rose
That will be waiting for you after the last exam.

(If there isn't one waiting for you, I suggest buying one and sticking it in the fridge.)
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:36, Reply)

I'm heading straight for Font.
On my own.
I don't care.

For those not in the know/not from around here, Font is an amazing bar where they serve £2 cocktails all day. Which contain a double measure. And they're really tasty.

Think I'll go for the chilled rosé too.
And some gin?
And 20 Richmonds :D
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:39, Reply)

Just say no

( Captain V, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:39, Reply)

Well, I never decline sex ;)

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:40, Reply)

I meant to the verbs
And outside of geeky circles sex isn't a verb!
( Captain V, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:43, Reply)

*Ahem*
Ikea beg to differ...
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:46, Reply)

In my defense
The box can't ask her...I think.
( Captain V, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:56, Reply)

Does that mean
she can sex the box safely with assumed consent?
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:58, Reply)

I'm going to go with yes
Because if she can get away with it I wont have to worry about my past quite so much.
( Captain V, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 12:02, Reply)

What about vodka and something fizzy that is pretending to be made of fruit?
No, not V, I mean something like Rubicon?
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:59, Reply)

Leave.
Leave now.
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 12:00, Reply)

I like drinks that so don't give a fuck, that they don't even bother pretending.
like Red Bull.

And that Pear Magners stuff is rather good too.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 12:04, Reply)