The world spent £914bn on defence in 2008
news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/business/8086117.stm

What would you spend £914bn on for the benefit of the human race?
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:28, 89 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Nuclear fusion research
Some documentary told me that the UK spent more on ringtones last year than we did on research into nuclear fusion and I like nuclear fusion.

Certainly more than I like annoying ringtones.
( Captain V, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:30, Reply)

Yes. This
On one hand we have shit R&B music played through tinny mobile phone speakers. On the other we have the solution to the looming energy crisis for the next thousand years.

*trivia* the biggest issue with nuclear fusion isn't the physics, it's the materials technology required to contain the temperatues and pressures in the reactor itself.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:36, Reply)

Well, yes
but the confinement of the plasma (at least in a tokamak) is done magnetically, so it doesn't 'touch the sides' as it were. The biggest problem is getting the plasma to sustain without having to put in more power than can be extracted.

As you say though, it's not the physics. We understand the theory pretty well. It's more of an engineering problem now.

Fission is OK, but we could run out of uranium relatively soon. Whereas we've got oceans full of water, and there's enough deuterium in it to keep us going for a long time yet. And electric cars are useless if you can't generate the electricity. Fusion is the only long term solution. IMHO.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:50, Reply)

Agreed
There is only a finite amount of useful Uranium in the ground, certainly not enough to compete with fossil fuels.

The point everyone seems to miss is that an electric car is using electricity generated mostly from non-sustainable means. We need to find a way of replacing an oil and gas based energy infrastructure within the next thirty years.

I'd happily stomach the 300% tax markup on the cost of a litre of petrol if the tax raised was spent on alternative energy research...
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:04, Reply)

A bit of education for the masses
On Green/Sustainable living wouldn't go amiss. In fact perhaps introduce it into school as compulsory.

I mean I'd say almost everyone I've lived with at University has had a fundamental issue with electricity saving. For example, leaving all the lights on before leaving the flat for the day. Or leaving every device on standby rather than turning off.

Not that I'm perfect, but if this is the state of supposedly affluent and educated people, it makes you wonder.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:29, Reply)

Can we have more nuclear power stations too?
I like them.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:36, Reply)

Yes we can!
Fission is great, and we need more of it, but I prefer the idea of having a miniature star in a box. I can't think of anything cooler and whenever I talk about fusion I want to be a nuclear physicist.
( Captain V, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:39, Reply)

Is it cold fission or cold fusion
that's meant to be the holy grail of nuclear physics?

And fission's splitting and fusion's...fusing, isn't it?
/A* at GCSE Physics! Activate!
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:59, Reply)

Sort of
Cold fusion is the holy grail in the sense that nobody has ever been able to reproduce it after it was first claimed to have been observed. Cold fusion is all a bunch of balls though.

If we can properly utilise fusion we're sorted for energy for yonks so in some ways that's the holy grail of a lot of things.

You're right with fission splitting and fusion fusing.
( Captain V, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:02, Reply)

My knowledge of that comes from Jasper Fforde
where they manage to get a cold fusion machine out of a radioactive cucumber.
That's where i learnt about entropy too.
It's all bullshit, but it's brilliantly written bullshit.

I know very little about science. But fusion is what goes on in the sun, so having fusion on a small scale is having a mini-sun? Won't that be horrifically dangerous?

I'm so getting kicked out of Utopia. I'd jsut be bitching about how it doesn't make etymological sense.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:05, Reply)

It's being done quite frequently already
It's just that, as K2 said, we need more energy to maintain it than we get from the reaction.

:edit: Horrifically dangerous would be three drunk manic depressives and an axe in the same building...
( Captain V, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:09, Reply)

Yes,
There should be checks in place to stop that happening.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:45, Reply)

Fusion
The resulting radiation is a fraction of what you get from existing nuclear plants, all you need is the technology to contain the reaction and a supply of deuterium. As it happens, there is a lot of it on the moon, which is why Russia, India, the US, Japan and the EU are working towards a permanent manned presence there within the next thirty years or so.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:13, Reply)

Dangerous?
Nope - fusion (in a tokamak) is totally self-regulating and the reaction will stop naturally if there's a leak.
(Shippy likes linebreaks and doesn't care what you think, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:24, Reply)

Oh, that's good.
So fission is more dangerous, because any leak basically pwns the world?

I'm aware of how stupid I'm sounding. Sorry.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:26, Reply)

not sounding stupid at all
it's more than acceptable to not know about something, and at least you are asking sensible questions
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:30, Reply)

Ha, it's more like all I'm doing in this thread is asking things.
It's like, GTFO and come back when you can actually contribute something!

Ah well. There do seem to be a lot of sciencey bods here. I feel so intimidated!
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:34, Reply)

Pie.
Free pie for all!
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:32, Reply)

A program of mass genocide
that left only the people I like.
That, and really good salad sandwiches.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:33, Reply)

I don't like this plan
It's choice death or living in a world with shit sandwiches.
( Captain V, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:34, Reply)

I won't put mayo on yours.

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:35, Reply)

But I bet there's going to be butter
And salad fucking sandwiches?! WILL NOBODY THINK OF THE MEAT?!
( Captain V, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:37, Reply)

It was the only food my mother couldn't fuck up when I was a kid.
Her salad sandwiches are awesome.

If you prefer something meatier we can arrange that.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:41, Reply)

Hmmm
Liver sausage, ham and chicken between sheets of bacon (instead of bread).
( Captain V, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:43, Reply)

You've just reminded me I have more chorizo sausages to cook today.

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:44, Reply)

!

( Captain V, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:46, Reply)

*raises eyebrow*

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:50, Reply)

HIV Research
Thus enabling a vaccine to be produced to be given to all patients.

For those people who have HIV already free antiretrovirals for life.
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:35, Reply)

I'd build a castle of cake
Then give it to the people. Repeat every year until it runs out.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:37, Reply)

Billions of clones of Daniel Craig.
Each and every women in the world to have one.
( girlinthehole, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:40, Reply)

Yes.
This gets my vote.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 13:07, Reply)

Sex.
And real ale.

I lead an exciting life, me...
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:43, Reply)

This
Works well for me.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:49, Reply)

Actually, the more I think about it
the more it seems like a good idea. Regular sex would keep us all happy and healthy, and, historically, real ale drinkers are friendlier and more easy-going than lager swillers. Perhaps if we sat the Israelis and the Palestinians down over a barrel of mild or bitter they'd all relax a bit and realise it wasn't worth squabbling and perhaps they could share after all. (Don't think the pork scratchings would go down too well though...)
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:53, Reply)

Yeah, the Saudis too!
Wait, what?
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:55, Reply)

Agreed.
Bunch of miserable cunts, the Saudis.

EDIT: Road Map to Peace = Pub Crawl to "You're My Best Mate"
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:21, Reply)

They shot Frank Gardiner.
I LOVE Frank Gardiner.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:23, Reply)

Yep
Despite the attacks of September 11th 2001 the US still sucks the cock of Saudi oil. Instead of bombing the crap out of the wasteland that is Afghanistan, they should've been bombing the crap out of Saudi Arabia
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:27, Reply)

I vote for this
Get both parties along to a real ale festival.

Instead of building walls, they can invest in universal CAMRA memberships for Palestinian and Israeli citizens.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:56, Reply)

The Gaza Strip Beer Festival
Sod the "road map to peace," this is a far better idea. Yes, I know Muslims don't drink, but perhaps it would help them relax a bit in that heat. All this business of foregoing sex and alcohol is just going to lead to pent-up aggression - it's no wonder they're all so angry. _{Nothing to do with having your homeland invaded, of course...}
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:10, Reply)

I like this.
Depending on the ale.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:50, Reply)

Hopback Summer Lightning or Woodford's Wherry?

(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:51, Reply)

Need samples.

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:56, Reply)

Moorhouse Black Cat or Freeminer Deep Shaft?

(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:54, Reply)

Dunno.
My favourite is Bath Ales' Wild Hare. And I've been buying lots of the Badger ones recently - they're fantastic. I realise they may not be remotely hardcore enough for Real Ale enthusiasts but I like 'em. Also, I am a girl - can't manage whole pints of ale.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:57, Reply)

Not hardcore enough?
I disagree. My favourite beers are not necessarily the really rare ones* (a lot of the rarer ones are actually a bit disappointing), and I've long been a fan of the Bath brewery. As for Badger, there are times I've come off a walk round some remote godforsaken part of Kent and thought I'd like nothing better than a good pint of Badger Best**.

*_{Though admittedly the Deep Shaft is one of the best stouts I've ever tasted and I've only been able to find it in beer shops in Gloucester
**Or First Gold, or whatever it's called these days...}
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:07, Reply)

Sex.
And real ale rosé wine.

/runs
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:08, Reply)

Wel, we've got to be inclusive, I suppose.
"Hail to the ale, and a-welcome the wine (for the ladies)"
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:11, Reply)

Doesn't everyone hate rosé though?
Blossom Hill, how I love thee.

Not had a drink in aaaaages. :(
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:14, Reply)

Admittedly, I'm more into red
But I realise there's a place for rosé - particularly in the summer. And when you're staggering into the cornershop in the middle of the night for an urgent re-stock, a cheap rosé is usually a safer bet than a cheap white.
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:16, Reply)

What about those of us that dislike Ale AND wine
Where is my grown up apple juice?!
( Captain V, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:21, Reply)

There's room for cider and perry in my UN beer fest

(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:22, Reply)

Good stuff
Time for a pint of Old Rosie :)

If only.
( Captain V, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:26, Reply)

Faucett Inn Cider?

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:22, Reply)

Cider drinker?
Sorry, I've got into the CAMRA habit of just referring to "real ale" but actually meaning "real ale and cider." Your fermented apples are more than welcome.

As is anybody who wants to bring a mead stand to our global Beer Festival.
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:23, Reply)

What's the difference between ale and real ale?
Not just a facetious question. I genuinely don't know.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:24, Reply)

Without splitting too many hairs
It refers to the way it's served.

"Real ale," or "cask ale" is served from a cask. After it did its initial fermentation, it was put into the cask to mature, and it is not filtered, pasteurised or subject to any chemical alteration. The brewers usually drop in some sort of isinglass or Irish moss to drag down some of the sediment, and after that it is shipped to the pub in the same state. It's basically still "alive" when it's poured and drunk - which is why you have to be careful if you get the cloudy pint near the bottom of the cask as it's full of dead yeast.

There are several beers which call themselves ales - e.g., John Smith's, Tetley's Smoothflow, modern-day Boddington's - which are treated and stuffed into a pressurised lager-style keg. They're boiled, filtered and gassed with Nitrogen and some extra CO₂, often with some additives to make them creamier. Whilst this means your keg of bitter doesn't go off or go silty near the bottom, anybody with any taste can tell you that the treatment process completely ruins the character of the beer.

Sorry, went off on one slightly there...
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:31, Reply)

I'm learning new things every day
Unfortunately, I'm NOT learning how to decline verbs.

Ah well.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:34, Reply)

Just keep thinking of that cold bottle of rose
That will be waiting for you after the last exam.

(If there isn't one waiting for you, I suggest buying one and sticking it in the fridge.)
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:36, Reply)

I'm heading straight for Font.
On my own.
I don't care.

For those not in the know/not from around here, Font is an amazing bar where they serve £2 cocktails all day. Which contain a double measure. And they're really tasty.

Think I'll go for the chilled rosé too.
And some gin?
And 20 Richmonds :D
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:39, Reply)

Just say no

( Captain V, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:39, Reply)

Well, I never decline sex ;)

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:40, Reply)

I meant to the verbs
And outside of geeky circles sex isn't a verb!
( Captain V, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:43, Reply)

*Ahem*
Ikea beg to differ...
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:46, Reply)

In my defense
The box can't ask her...I think.
( Captain V, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:56, Reply)

Does that mean
she can sex the box safely with assumed consent?
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:58, Reply)

I'm going to go with yes
Because if she can get away with it I wont have to worry about my past quite so much.
( Captain V, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 12:02, Reply)

What about vodka and something fizzy that is pretending to be made of fruit?
No, not V, I mean something like Rubicon?
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:59, Reply)

Leave.
Leave now.
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 12:00, Reply)

I like drinks that so don't give a fuck, that they don't even bother pretending.
like Red Bull.

And that Pear Magners stuff is rather good too.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 12:04, Reply)

Worlds biggest ommlette, I could probably cover the entire surface area of London.
With condamonts for all concerned.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:53, Reply)

The lagistics are mind boggling, but I'll probaly spend the rest of the day thinking bout it, at least till I see two dogs

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:55, Reply)

I've got a puppy in the back of my van
You can come stroke him if you like.
( Captain V, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:56, Reply)

Ohhh, a symbian, my gran has one of them, they are great for deseeding cucumbers.
What's your one for mister?
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 10:59, Reply)

*blank stare*

( Captain V, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:03, Reply)

... the lesser known Carbear super power.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:43, Reply)

Gonz!
Stop making me office lol.

If you're not dressed as a carebear next time I see you I shall be mightily dissappointed!
( Captain V, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:45, Reply)

Haha, ok, but only if you dress as a Warebear.
Wait, I want to be the warebear, can we take it in turns?
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:57, Reply)

Establish a world Dictatorship
With me as the head Dic. And everyone doing what I say.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:32, Reply)

Enlightened Despotism!
Democracy is for people who think Mankind is born equal.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:35, Reply)

"We're here to preserve democracy, not practice it"
Or, to quote W.S.Churchill "Democracy is the worst possible form of government"
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:39, Reply)

Stem cell research
Renewable energy improvements
Improved recycling schemes
Food, education and peace for third-world countries
Basic free healthcare for everyone on the planet.
Monkey butlers.
( gareth_alien will be human again at, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:33, Reply)

Nice things for everyone

( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:41, Reply)

I'ld give everyone in africa a million dollars each and send them off to the western world.
It would really fuck with the economy.

I'ld pocket the rest.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:45, Reply)

I would goto the Casino
and stick it all on red.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:46, Reply)

Every girl in the world, minus family, at the same time.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 11:46, Reply)

I'd make myself a clone army.
And spend the rest of the money on finding a way of making myself invincible and immortal.
( Cawl, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 12:01, Reply)

Thats a fair bit of cash.
Well I guess renationalising and reconstruction of the public transport system, so that public transport is an actual option for people to use as opposed to what we have now, which appears to mostly function as a last ditch means of transport for the poor and desprate. Funding for alternative sources of energy, got to say I don't know a whole lot about fusion power and such, but what i've read above sounds interesting. Better funding for the NHS and try and undo some of the damage that including private enterprise in the state school system has done. Also, look into encouraging more light industry, and hopefuly producing some jobs that aren't just in the service industry and call centres and such. Failing that I'd build a fucking massive house out of solid gold, buy a jet powered hellicopter submarine and claim it all back on expenses.
(Fredz A graveyard of hopes, a dump of ambition, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 12:31, Reply)

Hookers and Cocaine
For everyone!
(Is this a good idea? ... Yes this is definitely a good idea, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 13:26, Reply)