I once had to go and see the doctor because I lost a bit of dolly mixture up my fanny.
The dirty bastard put his fingers up there. I was all like "why are you doing that you pervert?" and he was all "I am examining you for the lost dolly mixture". In my mind, this is no way for a medical professional to behave, especially as he wasn't my regular doctor. My other doctor only examines me once.

So I guess what I'm asking is, what things have you lost inside your bodily orifices?
(MoistTickle we are legion, Fri 3 Jul 2009, 15:04, 9 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I've lost sweetcorn in my mouth
luckily I found it again the next day.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Fri 3 Jul 2009, 15:05, Reply)

Did you look for it three times?

(Bazongaloid, Fri 3 Jul 2009, 15:08, Reply)

I lost a crayon up my nose
D'Oh
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 3 Jul 2009, 15:12, Reply)

A peanut up my nose!
I was only little
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Fri 3 Jul 2009, 15:13, Reply)

A mate of my ex wife
lost a tampon up her once after a bout of "I'm bleeding, but I'm pissed and therefore couldn't give a monkeys" sexehtiem.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 3 Jul 2009, 15:25, Reply)

While working in the packing factory
I lost the end of my finger in a packet of dolly mixture
(Is this a good idea? ... Yes this is definitely a good idea, Fri 3 Jul 2009, 15:38, Reply)

Hahahaaa nice one

(smathels left-wing not feckin' chicken wing, Fri 3 Jul 2009, 15:43, Reply)

A lump of croissant
I was masticating quite happily when I felt the urge to sneeze. I thought it better to try and swallow, then sneeze, rather than sneezing a bolus of chewed croissant everywhere. I obviously didn't get there fast enough, as I sneezed immediately after I swallowed it and then felt very odd. As if something was putting an unexpected amount of pressure on my right sinus.

So I blew my nose quite hard to clear said sinus, and after a few minutes' effort, a mucus-coated lump of chewed croissant shot out. I was a little disturbed, to say the least.
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 3 Jul 2009, 15:59, Reply)

when I was 4
I was watching my Mum prepare dinner, she was chopping carrots. So I did the most logical thing a 4 year old would do, I took a piece of carrot and stuck it as far up my nose as it would go. I was quite proud of this, unfortunately, the doctor who spent 2 hours retreiving it wasn't so amazed.
Two weeks later I got my revenge on him, when he had to pump a bottle of cough syrup out of my stomach. That showed him!
(knackerz is skinning up, Sat 4 Jul 2009, 4:30, Reply)