NSFW The long-awaited (by some) sequel to Hitlercock NSFW
By request from CHCB, I give you, Bert Reynolds:

NSFW Stiffy and the Bandit (minus the Bandit) NSFW

Also by request from an anonymous B3tan (not sure whether they wanted their identity to be known), I am proud to present, Logan:

NSFW Wolverine NSFW

...and yes, I do find it as disturbing as you do.

EDIT and if you're looking at Stiffy, wondering why he seems to be red on top, but covered in blue splotches on the bottom, it could be down to my compulsive masturbation combined with hepatitis B, or it could be because I tried, and failed, to draw jeans and a red shirt on my cock.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 15:43, 46 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Is there nobody here?
Nobody brave enough to click? Do you have any idea how difficult it was to make a stetson for my cock? -not to mention explaining to my girlfriend that I was too busy doing cock-millinery to call her, and then having to explain why I was doing that.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 15:57, Reply)

I'm at work, I'll probably click when I'm home if I'm bored and/or drunk enough

( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:04, Reply)

I hope that you'll be suitably impressed
an awful lot of effort went into that Bert Reynolds
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:05, Reply)

Burt Reynolds, surely?

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 17:33, Reply)

My name is Bert, it's my cock, hence Bert Reynolds

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 21:08, Reply)

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:05, Reply)

( girlinthehole, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:06, Reply)

I hope you two are communicating via sign language?

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:06, Reply)

Speechless?
I will never, ever understand why male B3tans choose to click the cock links.

What's wrong with you?
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:06, Reply)

I like a bit of cock.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:07, Reply)

I haven't clicked it
but I would quite like to see the hat

can you take a photo of the props sans cock so I can look at work?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:08, Reply)

I'll have to take pictures of the hat tonight and post them tomorrow

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:09, Reply)

it's ok
I'll probably just look at the pic of your cock tonight ;-)
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:16, Reply)

Gaz me if you want to dress you cock up too
we'll do Starsky and Hutch
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:17, Reply)

hahahahahahahahahaha

( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:21, Reply)

I read the subject of that and thought "naa, fat chance"
but did a mental double take on reading the Starsky and Hutch bit...

Think I'll pass though. My mrs already thinks I'm weird enough.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:21, Reply)

Enough is never enough
She'll only be truly happy when we've got together and photographed our genitals interrogating Huggy Bearcock.

Now we need to find a black cock too...
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:23, Reply)

damnit
my boss' boss' boss just walked past as I read that and I almost ruptured myself trying to hold the laughter in!
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:27, Reply)

You've made me so proud

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:28, Reply)

nice hat

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 17:48, Reply)

That's so wrong it's fucking hilarious
Congratulations on owning the Mr Benn of the penile world
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:08, Reply)

Cheers
*tips hat*
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:09, Reply)

Credit where credit's due
I'm gonna disturb the missus ....She wondered what the wheezing laughter was about
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:11, Reply)

I'm sure she'll love it
The ladies love Burt Reynolds, and who couldn't fall in love with Stiffy?
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:12, Reply)

She gave me that look she gives me
when I show her random filth from t'internet .... But I could see the glimmer of lust.
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:24, Reply)

Hahahaha
she must be really dirty
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:24, Reply)

More patient at the perpetual torrent of smut I subject her to .... But yeah, a little bit
I say Dirty Harry would be a good one for the next bout of cock dressing up
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:36, Reply)

Wolverine is pretty ace
I wouldn't say is was NSFW though - its only a cartoon willy, although Stiffy & the Bandit is a bit dodgy!
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:08, Reply)

Wolverine was a pain in the arse
first, his costume kept rubbing off, then in the picture I took his face didn't come out clearly, so I had to do him all over again in MS Paint, and he looks a bit shit.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:10, Reply)

I clicked at work
you have a fine cock sir.
( Peej, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:24, Reply)

Ta very much
When I posted the original Hitlercock, somebody tried to belittle him. It made me sad :C
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:25, Reply)

(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:25, Reply)

I wish people would stop with the blank posts
is that awe you're dumbfounded with?
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:26, Reply)

I'll wager it's lust

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:36, Reply)

Yeah', that's quite creepy.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:37, Reply)

You only think everything i do is creepy
because you weren't around a long time ago, when we all joked happily about this stuff until it eventually evolved into this.... which admittedly, is really creepy.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 17:11, Reply)

So, basicly, I think the creepy things you do are creepy because they're creepy.
Yup.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 17:26, Reply)

Quite spectacular, Sir

( Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 16:52, Reply)

Definitely Mr Benn
ace

*clicks* not that it makes any difference but it made me laugh.

I think you're still lovely, albeit in a rather twisted way.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 17:46, Reply)

DO MORE!

( @RBFesquire Good luck b3ta, was nice knowing you. So long., Wed 23 Sep 2009, 21:04, Reply)

CLIFF COCK!
Or is that a step too far?
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 21:08, Reply)

Mmmm,
maybe dressed as an angel?

I wonder if he would be up for it?

edit: I said this else where to, but I thought I would you my lovely.

When we click 'I Like This' on off topic, where can I see all the popular clicked posts?

Cheers.

double edit: found it cheers...
( @RBFesquire Good luck b3ta, was nice knowing you. So long., Wed 23 Sep 2009, 21:10, Reply)

Did you?
Christ, can you tell us where?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 22:39, Reply)

This is about all I could find :-(
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/all/
( @RBFesquire Good luck b3ta, was nice knowing you. So long., Thu 24 Sep 2009, 0:39, Reply)

It's like a road traffic accident.
You know you shouldn't look but you just can't help yourself.
( girlinthehole, Wed 23 Sep 2009, 21:56, Reply)

Oh god.
That's just ...
hilarious. haha.

ta bert - I visit here on a five minute break from spring cleaning, and promptly lose my tea all over myself and laptop screen.

Fucking hell that is going to have me in stitches for the rest of the day now.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 24 Sep 2009, 4:56, Reply)