I would like to know
why Poppet wont be friends with Al. I'm procrastinating for a little while and have just read through the more interesting posts on here and it really seems to me that they could be good friends. I mean think about it, they both love to debate subjects, they share an interest in the cricket, science and are certainly animal lovers. He's extended several olive branches and thrown some doves of peace into the mix which I think is a mighty fine thing to do. So why the reluctance on her part I wonder? Is it really so hard to make friends on here? This IS Offtopic where everything sparkly and fluffy is attainable afterall.

What would you, the internet like to know and why?
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 20:01, 59 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

What I'd like to know is
why I've suddenly become an internet, and should I see a doctor about it?
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 20:16, Reply)

I can hardly refer to all of the users on here by name now can I?
There's far too many lurkers and stalky types to do that. Very well...Mistaspakkaman, what would you like to know other than my form of address?
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 20:24, Reply)

Given a nomadic caterpillar with a constant velocity, a funky bailiff with a variable acceleration and an industrial keyboard in agony, what are the chances they'll all vote Tory in the next election?
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 21:30, Reply)

Honestly? Genuine answer here:
tinyurl.com/ydxl3o2
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 21:33, Reply)

I'd like to know what happened to the other orange toed sock I used to have
I've only got one hanging around my drawer now.
(Bazongaloid, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 20:22, Reply)

I ate it
It tasted of bacon
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 20:24, Reply)

I'd like to know what makes you think you're so special
You're such a pissy little whinging bitch, every time anyone has the audacity to question your childishly offensive behaviour you keep banging on and on about it. If you dish it out, you have to learn to take it, frankly it's embarrassing that you can't hold an argument on your own without having to get your little posse of backup singers to weigh in.

Gettting a group of people to have a go at someone doesn't make your views and more valid, it just makes you look more of a spineless tosser. Christ knows, you used to be quite funny a while ago when you actually put some effort into your posts, your gutless whinging that everything here has got boring should really be directed at yourself. There's no-one else to blame here.
(cheeses swept kissed a dog and he liked it., Sun 27 Sep 2009, 20:28, Reply)

O HAPPY DAY CHEESES IS HERE
*Bows down to the great fromage*

*Laughs like a mong on ketamine*
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 20:33, Reply)

Errrrrm, well, thanks for the roundabout compliment
However, I don't recall ever rounding up a mob to support anything I've written on this site. Also, being criticised by someone's second account, that kind of undermines your point doesn't it?
(Bazongaloid, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 20:36, Reply)

It's a wonderful coincidence
that when you start laying into someone, all your little friends suddenly appear to back you up. Now, you can deny this all you like, but I think you know in all honesty that as soon as you think you might be on a losing streak you're straight onto the gaz, in fact, I suspect you're the kind of person who probably starts sending text messages.
(cheeses swept kissed a dog and he liked it., Sun 27 Sep 2009, 20:41, Reply)

gets popcorn

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 20:43, Reply)

I'm not sure being called a pissy whinging bitch and a spineless tosser
is that much of a compliment, no matter how backhanded Al.

I wonder how many people have second account still.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 20:42, Reply)

I was choosing to ignore that bit
and focus on the last lines where cheeses said I used to be funny.
(Bazongaloid, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 20:44, Reply)

Well then MAKE WITH THE FUNNY, ALTHEGEORDIE
And make it good or someone's meat puppet will crawl up the stairs and eat your toes as you sleep.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 20:48, Reply)

Well, as long as they leave my fucking socks alone

(Bazongaloid, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 20:52, Reply)

Fucking socks?
Do you mean the ones you wank into?
( thealternativefact, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 20:56, Reply)

No, those are quite obviously called my wanking socks

(Bazongaloid, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 20:58, Reply)

So fucking socks really are for fucking?
Thank god your dick doesn't work properly then - we don't want any out-of-wedlock disasters.
( thealternativefact, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 20:59, Reply)

Where do you think your wotsit stained sock went to?

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 21:02, Reply)

I reckon you nicked it
last time you were round mind. Now it spends most of it's time being frotted madly over the front of your pants.
(Bazongaloid, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 21:03, Reply)

That was my cover story
I gave it to cheeses. Fuck knows what's happened to it now. Poor sock, it lived a short but smelly life :(
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 21:04, Reply)

Blousie to the rescue.
Cue Wagner.

Da da da da da, da da da da da, da da da da da, da da da da

No one calls my pal Al a pissy winging bitch but me.

Fuck off cheesy.
( girlinthehole, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 20:57, Reply)

Yeah, that told them.
POW
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 21:02, Reply)

BGB has totally forgiven me for being such a cunt.
I may have to forgive her for daring to question me now.
(Bazongaloid, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 21:04, Reply)

Really? blimey she forgives easily
I wouldn't have.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 21:05, Reply)

That's becuase you're cold hearted
and cruel. Like me, but with nice tits and a lovely smile.
(Bazongaloid, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 21:06, Reply)

Rubbish!
I love your tits.
( thealternativefact, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 21:08, Reply)

And he's got a great smile
when his face doesn't fuck it up.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 21:09, Reply)

I am it's true. I'm a cold hearted cunt who doesn't give a shit about anyone or anything.
YAY ME.

Christ I miss alcohol.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 21:09, Reply)

You are one of the few people
who actually had the balls to point out just what a cock he was being, and what was his reaction? He got in a big strop and, surprise surprise, kept on banging on and on about it.
(cheeses swept kissed a dog and he liked it., Sun 27 Sep 2009, 21:09, Reply)

So what took you so long Cheeses?
Been out having a life? NOT ONLINE?
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 21:11, Reply)

Amazing as it must seem to most of the mouth breathers on here
yes, I don't get the chance to read this site as often as certain individuals, and this is one of the few occasions when I've actually been around to point to althegeordie just what a hypocritical dick he's become.

I think it's rather sad that the immediate assumption that when someone new turns up that they are a second account says a lot about the people throwing those accusations around.
(cheeses swept kissed a dog and he liked it., Sun 27 Sep 2009, 21:15, Reply)

It's a sad indictment of the times that we live in
Aye, fight and you may die. Run, and you'll live... at least a while. And dying in your beds, many years from now, would you be willin' to trade ALL the days, from this day to that, for one chance, just one chance, to come back here and tell our enemies that they may take our lives, but they'll never take... OUR FREEDOM!
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 21:23, Reply)

id like to know
how many people are on B3ta at any given time...

i'd like it to be broken down into:

number of lovely people in the process of posting on QOTW

number of people who have wandered over to off topic

number of cunts on talk
( spimf ™ is whoever you want him to be, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 21:49, Reply)

5

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 21:51, Reply)

I think cheeses swept is one of Al's accounts.
He's trying to make himself seem more important than he actually is by the fact that someone is actually bothered enough to be incensed by his posts.


There's not much that gets past Blousie.


I'm going to bed before I spontaneously combust through boredom.
( girlinthehole, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 21:59, Reply)

Stop picking on al
I'm sure he's been well-aware of how shit he's been lately, it's a disease most of us suffer from when we've been here for too long, but as I've said before, I know he's capable of more. I don't know who this cheeses swept person is, I remember them having a go at me a while ago, but I was being a cock back then, maybe I deserved it. Whoever it is, new person or meat puppet, they've got no right to comment on anybody else until they've contributed a post, let alone a memorable one. I hate posting from my phone, it's gay.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 22:13, Reply)

So's your face.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 22:26, Reply)

So's your mum

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 22:40, Reply)

"I would like to know why Poppet wont be friends with Al."
probably because he is deliberately mean to her.
you cannot make people be friends so why waste the time and energy trying to launch a discussion on the issue?
unless...
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Sun 27 Sep 2009, 23:23, Reply)

Because I've barely been on b3ta for the last week or so and wondered what was going on
sorry for having a life outside of this little screen. Must go, sleep is calling, thanks ever so for the opportunity to play a while.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sun 27 Sep 2009, 23:29, Reply)

yawn.
yawn.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Sun 27 Sep 2009, 23:37, Reply)

CALM DOWN DEAR, IT'S ONLY THE INTERNET

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 0:29, Reply)

Calm down dear
it's only traces of penis.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 0:49, Reply)