This one's for the lurkers.
I know you're out there. I'm not exactly a regular poster on /offtopic myself but I say something occasionally, when I've got something to say.
Come on lil lurkers, stick your neck out, say hello, give us an interesting fact or an amusing story, and let the /offtopic regulars rip you to shreds welcome you to the fold.
I know your first post can be pretty scary, so all of you do it together!
Besides, the regulars are doing fuck all today.
(Paolo Nutini's Bikini Better than Frederick Fleet's optometrist, Sat 17 Oct 2009, 20:08, 16 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Hello all, my names @ and im a lurkerholic!
(Masterb3ta, Sat 17 Oct 2009, 20:33, Reply)

Wow, a reply from a genuine lurker. I didn't expect that.
Hello @. I see from your profile you once shat into a condom and threw it at a mate. Good job, your purile humour gland works perfectly.
Also, for being the first lurker to shrug off their invisibilty cloak you can sit anywhere you want. Go on, we don't bite.
Keep it up, more posts please. We know where you live now.
(Paolo Nutini's Bikini Better than Frederick Fleet's optometrist, Sat 17 Oct 2009, 20:44, Reply)

Well I do aim to surprise
...just not usually in a good way.
I think I'll sit here, near the bar.
(Masterb3ta, Sat 17 Oct 2009, 21:18, Reply)

Hello
I am not a lurker so much, but I did join only recently and I am a bit pished.
(stimpy, Sat 17 Oct 2009, 21:49, Reply)

Hullo Stimpy!
Not even a month old yet, not nearly old enough to warrant "lurker" status, but still, everyone's gotta start somewhere.
And you've already posted some interesting stuff on here. Two boyfriends who know about each other, and approve? That's a rare thing. I would congratulate you but I try not to be patronising.
Seriously, the childish people in your story were the people who couldn't accept you'd made an unusual lifestyle choice. At least you weren't a gayer or going out with someone 20years older than you.
Yes, that was sarcasm.
Also, you hate pink. Anyone who hates pink deserves gold stars, IMHO.
Seriously, speak up more on here! You're out of the lurker closet now!
Shit the bed, this is starting to sound like a bloody self-help group...
(Paolo Nutini's Bikini Better than Frederick Fleet's optometrist, Sat 17 Oct 2009, 22:13, Reply)

Are you spakka's meat puppet?

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sat 17 Oct 2009, 22:22, Reply)

^^
This.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sat 17 Oct 2009, 22:27, Reply)

Unfortunately not
As I like both meat and puppets. Not sure how I'm gonna go about convincing you of this though.
I just remember my utter horror at trying to get a word in on here, and figured a weekend would be the best time to draw the kiddies out of hiding.
Um. I'm not Gary Glitter's meat puppet either.
As a side note, how do I go about getting one of those B3TA beardy badges? Copying it doesn't feel right, kinda like wearing a WW2 veteran's medals. Ugh.
(Paolo Nutini's Bikini Better than Frederick Fleet's optometrist, Sat 17 Oct 2009, 22:36, Reply)

Read the faq section on posting images
and find the image location with the right mouse button. If you need further help, gaz me.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sat 17 Oct 2009, 22:46, Reply)

Right, I've had to stick the old ninja pic up.
I used to think it was funny. Unfortunately I can't find any pics that B3tards will accept right now, other than pics that are, for some strange reason, bigger than lifesize.
I'll sort it out some other time. For now I'm off out. I'll leave you to mingle.
And I actually feel kinda humbled to have some big names here. Is that sad...?
EDIT: I've just realised I've posted a picture where my face is hidden to prove I'm a real person. What a twat.
(Paolo Nutini's Bikini Better than Frederick Fleet's optometrist, Sat 17 Oct 2009, 23:00, Reply)

Is this offtopic lurkers or complete lurkers?
If the former: As a kid I used to get scared if "Summer Breeze" by the Isley Brothers was playing.
(mmmm curry doesn't really understand this sig lark, Sat 17 Oct 2009, 22:26, Reply)

I'm here.
Alone.
( girlinthehole, Sat 17 Oct 2009, 22:40, Reply)

I'm alone, and considering LittleBigPlanet
I got all excited when someone added me as a friend on the PS3 through it a while back.

Turns out they're 9.

So now I'm nervous that I'm going to be labelled as a child-groomer simply because this little boy helps me get all the bonuses in the game.
(mmmm curry doesn't really understand this sig lark, Sat 17 Oct 2009, 22:43, Reply)

Bar har har har!
Aww that's sweet.
( warmfuzzies Isn't here, Sun 18 Oct 2009, 10:54, Reply)

I'm here
been a b3tan for years, even posted picatures.
(Juan Quar is clinging to her front teeth on, Sat 17 Oct 2009, 22:54, Reply)

I are here
Just got back from seeing Tim Minchin in Sheffield ......... He was sixteen types of awesome.

By no means a lurker but I'll let you into a little known fact, I rigged up a catapult to fling the slugs which plagued my garden this summer. The surrounding area has experienced high velocity gastropod molluscs descending from the heavens.
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Sat 17 Oct 2009, 23:32, Reply)