Any b3tans looking for a job?
www.independent.co.uk/news/business/news/270-jobs-at-new-sausage-plant-1827999.html
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 26 Nov 2009, 12:50, 23 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I wish
there was such a thing as a 'sausage plant'. I'd have 'em in my window boxes in a trice.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 26 Nov 2009, 12:55, Reply)

Do they have a hide the sausage department?
I would feel fully qualified to work there.
( girlinthehole, Thu 26 Nov 2009, 12:57, Reply)

Woo that's over the river from me!
Imagine being asked what you do and saying "I'm a sausage-packer."
*hands in notice at both jobs*
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 26 Nov 2009, 12:57, Reply)

I'm off to the pub, probably for sausage and mash now...
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 26 Nov 2009, 13:02, Reply)

noticesausage jobsends
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 26 Nov 2009, 13:04, Reply)

Gwan fuck off!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 26 Nov 2009, 14:02, Reply)

I've heard their state-of-the-art sausages are really nice.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 26 Nov 2009, 13:10, Reply)

Tulip sausages?
So that's what she's doing. I was wondering where she'd got to!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 26 Nov 2009, 13:13, Reply)

Has anyone...
...done the 'put your Tulips around my sausage' pun yet or is that far too obvious?
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Thu 26 Nov 2009, 13:37, Reply)

Mmmm... Sausage
*plans giant sausage-fest*
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 26 Nov 2009, 13:28, Reply)

giant sausage-fest bash

oh yeah they're the same thing, rofl.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 26 Nov 2009, 13:32, Reply)

There's a Tulip in Cornwall near where I live
They supply bacon to loads of places including Harrods. They do their best to make it look Cornish when in fact its a Danish company and all the bacon originates from Denmark.

Most of my mates have worked there at some point or another and some still do. Its fucking horrible.
( Peej, Thu 26 Nov 2009, 13:35, Reply)

It's funny when jobs are created for local poor people!
A sausage-plants would be ace, though. Would you have to water it with lard and ketchup?
(Spleep Shit, or get off the internet., Thu 26 Nov 2009, 14:00, Reply)

Lard and brown sauce you mean

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 26 Nov 2009, 14:03, Reply)

Pffft!
Fool.
(Spleep Shit, or get off the internet., Thu 26 Nov 2009, 14:06, Reply)

Brown sauce is for sausages and sausage rolls

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 26 Nov 2009, 14:09, Reply)

Wrong wrong wrong
Brown for bacon
Ketchup for sausage
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 26 Nov 2009, 14:47, Reply)

ketchup is only for hotdogs sausages
Proper grown-up sausages need braaahn sauce.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 26 Nov 2009, 14:51, Reply)

He's right you know...
It's in Debrett's.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Thu 26 Nov 2009, 14:52, Reply)

He's wrong because bacon needs no accompaniment

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 26 Nov 2009, 14:58, Reply)

Heretic!

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Thu 26 Nov 2009, 14:58, Reply)

You know when guys walk into a club and go "Cor, this is a saussage fest, let's go somewhere else.".
I ain't ever seen a girl walk into a club and say "Cor, there's a load of fanny in here tonight, let's go somewhere else."
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 26 Nov 2009, 15:17, Reply)

Because all birds love the minge.
True Story. That or they can all synchronise their dirty fanny cycles.
(The Boy Monders I have ginger bits in my beard., Thu 26 Nov 2009, 15:38, Reply)