A brand new toaster

( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 19:48, 1 reply, 16 years ago)

You crazy mofo.

( girlinthehole, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 19:49, Reply)

But this one's got six buttons.

( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 20:07, Reply)

how many slices?

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 20:12, Reply)

4
with 2 sets of independent controls.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 20:20, Reply)

the most aspirational of all toasters

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 20:30, Reply)

One of these days
I plan to invent a toaster with 56 buttons. Have not yet thought of what they'll all do, but I'd just love a toaster with lots of controls.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 20:34, Reply)

would anybody like any...
...toast?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 20:39, Reply)

Would you like a cheese and ham Breville?

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 20:48, Reply)

I had to get rid of my Breville.
Or else I would have been the size of a house and severely lacking in vitamins other than those you find in cheese and bread.
( girlinthehole, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 20:50, Reply)

Story of my life.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 20:52, Reply)

Funnily enough, the make of my new toaster is Breville
I tried to find a link to it on the Breville homepage, won't actually let me navigate anywhere, so here's a link to it's Amazon page.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 21:01, Reply)

Perhaps
one of the buttons could be the "Insert a dramatic pause in the toast-marketing mode".
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 20:49, Reply)

What the effing buggery does a toaster need with six buttons.
It's design gone mad.
( girlinthehole, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 20:13, Reply)

It's a dual-control toaster.
(almost like those dual control cars that driving instructors have).
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 20:20, Reply)

so it's a training toaster?

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 20:31, Reply)

Not quite
More like a 'competition toaster'.

Although one use for a multi-control toaster is to teach kids people with too much impatience who are overly fond of pressing buttons the virtues of patience. You could build a multi-slot toaster with multiple eject-buttons and get all of the impatient button-pushers to hover a finger over their buttons. If just one person presses the button before the toasting-cycle is complete, everyone's toast will be undercooked, and the button-pusher will be scorned by the rest of the group for doing this.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 20:41, Reply)

*mind blows*
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 20:42, Reply)

Clickah.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 20:54, Reply)