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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Fuck sweets and kitchens
I've got tickets to see DICK MOTHERFUCKING DALE!

Thank you to Vippers for the tip.

I am practically foaming at the helmet in anticipation...
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:07, 73 replies, latest was 16 years ago)
deeedleeedleeedleeedleewwwwwwdewdewdewdewwwwdadewdewdeeeewn

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:07, Reply)
My father will not fucking believe it.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:10, Reply)
you are most welcome old chap
enjoy

look out for a tall bald guy with glasses in the audience. he is a guy I work with
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:15, Reply)
Ah man I am really excited.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:21, Reply)
so you should be

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:21, Reply)

I am practically foaming at the helmet in anticipation...

I've heard that not everyone is capable of such a thing. I think we require a debate on the subject.
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:18, Reply)
a 'mass debate', no less

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:19, Reply)
And once we have numbers
We can have a Maths Debate. Oh dear.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:22, Reply)
This thread is so old skool
I've just written 'Boobless' on my calculator in tribute.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:28, Reply)
Now write 'Shell oil'

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:28, Reply)
and Shoes

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:29, Reply)
and egg shell

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:30, Reply)
Hellish

(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:31, Reply)
07734

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 14:25, Reply)
That comment deserves recognition...
*stands on desk and applauds*
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:42, Reply)
Foaming at the helmet
is quite easy. I do it every morning in the shower. A little bit of soap, some agitation to make the bubbles and voila!
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:22, Reply)
I was trying to think of the male equivalent
of 'frothing at the gash'
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:23, Reply)
is there a word for jap's eye that doesn't offend the Japanese?
I only know dill-hole and that's too Beavis and Butthead.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:25, Reply)
Chink's eye?
Just saying, like.
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:27, Reply)
What's it actually called?

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:27, Reply)
I think it's 'Wee-wee Hole'

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:28, Reply)
The opening of the urethra?
I suppose it must have a medical name, but I've no idea what it is.

Edit - Jizz nozzle?
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:28, Reply)
That's what i mean
EDIT: Jizzole!
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:29, Reply)
Fo' Shizzole
Jizzole.
(I helped save b3ta! Jimbuktu See? Right here, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:31, Reply)
We've just invented a new word
*phones Susie Dent*
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:32, Reply)
Don;t ring her
I've just done a course on dictionaries.
(It was a half hour webcast on the OED, but shhh)
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:34, Reply)
Why would you need a course on dictionaries?
Surely that would be about as much good as lessons on how to look up a phone book?
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:35, Reply)
Yeah, but Suzie Dent!
Carol and Suzie. Smash, smash!


Not now, when they were fit!
(I helped save b3ta! Jimbuktu See? Right here, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:37, Reply)
Susie's always been a bit skinny though.
Like that new lass who does Carol's job. Rachel or whatever. Skin and bone.
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:40, Reply)
Yeah, true
I couldn't sleep last night so spent hours watching countdown on 4od. It had bloody Pam Ayres on ffs.
(I helped save b3ta! Jimbuktu See? Right here, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:41, Reply)
I loathe Ayres with a passion
bordering on psychosis.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:50, Reply)
I'll be the plane
Pam Ayres and Sandi Toksvig are the towers.
(I helped save b3ta! Jimbuktu See? Right here, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:56, Reply)
ooh, jizzle!
That's it. I'm going to call it a jizzole or a jizzle from now on.
I'm scared of saying Jap's eye in front of a Japanese person.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:33, Reply)
The truth is stranger than fiction...
...it is the 'meatus urinarius'.

Trust me - I'm a Doctor. (A specialist in the 'ailments of the actress'.)
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:37, Reply)
Google confirms this
But I prefer jizzle.
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:39, Reply)
You are right about Jizzle...genius.
It was always called the 'spunk-hole' 'round these parts.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:41, Reply)
Meatus Cleatus?
C'mon, cleatus!
(I helped save b3ta! Jimbuktu See? Right here, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:42, Reply)
Yeah but that applies to other openings too
It must have its own speacial name.
Sod it. It's jizzle.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:44, Reply)
Agreed
Sig edited in celebration of the new word
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:46, Reply)
Right, Jizzle it is.
*hammers desk*
'Sold - to the lady in the red shell-suit.'
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:46, Reply)
I totally haz one!
It's from Sweden!
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:50, Reply)
A Swedish jizzle?

(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:51, Reply)
No!
A red shellsuit
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:53, Reply)
Ha ha
You took the bait!
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:56, Reply)
*kicks*

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:57, Reply)
*clasps jizzle*

(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:59, Reply)
I know...
...because I am watching you though a telescope.

*whistles 'sweet dreams are made of this'*
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:57, Reply)
for the newer b3tans
can I refer you to www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post414925 (thanks to Amorous Badger for making this easy to find).
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:30, Reply)
Sweet!
I'll see your dick dale, and raise you Gil Scott Heron.
(I helped save b3ta! Jimbuktu See? Right here, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:22, Reply)
I've seen him at the Jazz Cafe
He actually wasn't terribly engaging - but then he's one of those artists like Bob Dylan who can be either wonderful* or terrible live.

*wonderful if you like Bob Dylan, I mean.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:25, Reply)
Uh oh.
Wasn't hugely impressed by the new stuff he played, but love the old stuff so fingers crossed then...
(I helped save b3ta! Jimbuktu See? Right here, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:28, Reply)
This was some years back
I think the quality of performance is dictated by whether or not he's 'on the brown' at that time...
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:29, Reply)
hahaha
Well, it's one on the list and a trip to the big smoke so I'm sure it will rock.* Where's DD playing?






*might actually be soul
(I helped save b3ta! Jimbuktu See? Right here, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:31, Reply)
The Luminaire in NW6
Annoyingly on the opposite side of town fro my home. Even more annoyingly about 2 mins from where my brother no longer lives, the selfish cunt.

It's not a venue I'm familiar with, I have to confess.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:33, Reply)
He probably did it on purpose.
I barely know London, is NW6 by the street paved with gold?
(I helped save b3ta! Jimbuktu See? Right here, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:42, Reply)
Funnily enough
it's chock full of Paddies, so there may be the odd crock of gold here and there...
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:56, Reply)
Do you do that pre-foam thing as well?

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:27, Reply)
The name Dick Dale isn't very rock and roll is it.
Sounds like a bloody cartoon character.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:34, Reply)
It's surf rock baby
surf rock
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:35, Reply)
Or a hillside
in Yorkshire.
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:47, Reply)
You don't think
'Dick Dale and the Deltones' sounds rock'n'roll?

Seriously?
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 13:07, Reply)
You jammy get.
Steal one of his plectrums for me.

In fact, steal me his fucking Strat.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:39, Reply)
it's mine I'm afraid

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:42, Reply)
I will swap it for a beautiful Ibanez accoustic that used to belong to...
...*deletes name for legal purposes*
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:45, Reply)
I accept
as long as it wasn't someone shit
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:49, Reply)
Bet it's Roger Whittaker
or Ralph McTell.
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:50, Reply)
Mike Harding

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:51, Reply)
Derek Griffiths.

(I helped save b3ta! Jimbuktu See? Right here, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:57, Reply)
he's boss
The theme from Heads & Tails was like pure Django!
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:58, Reply)
Absolutely
He was the king of kids' television music.

Remember Bod?
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 12:59, Reply)
Farmer Barleymow and Bod?
That's not snap.
(I helped save b3ta! Jimbuktu See? Right here, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 13:00, Reply)
Hmmmm, Straaaawberry.
The hippos were right.

Were you?
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 13:02, Reply)
Dammit!
I went Chocolate. Bloody frogs and their orchestra/band.
(I helped save b3ta! Jimbuktu See? Right here, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 13:04, Reply)
If I ever get married
This is what she will have to walk down the aisle to.
(I helped save b3ta! Jimbuktu See? Right here, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 13:00, Reply)

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