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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Its not so much a slur of character
but I do hate it when complete strangers feel the need to say 'cheer up, it might not happen' to you in the street. I feel like punching them and then explaining to them in great deal why I'm annoyed... preferably in a restaurant, while I'm eating food that they're paying for... and I'm kicking them under the table, whilst wearing steel toecaps... the fucks... cheer up... CHEER THIS!
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 16:51, 3 replies, latest was 16 years ago)
I walk around telling people that are smiling that everyone they ever know is going to die.

(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 16:57, Reply)
I like to kill every family member
of anyone I see looking remotely upbeat.
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:00, Reply)
You should say that to one of the 'cheer up' people and see what happens
I predict the end of the world or a fight to the death.
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:01, Reply)
It wouldn't be much of a fight
Nobody would hit psychochomp because you're not allowed to hit girls.
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:02, Reply)
This is true
But who's to say the 'cheer up' person isn't a girl too!? In my experience its usually the sort of retarded statement a 30something woman would make... or a 40something bald man... these are the catagories.
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:04, Reply)
Hmmmm, the 40 something year old bald man
is probably a racist too. That sort usually are.
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:07, Reply)
Probably
While we're making wild accusations we may as well add racism to the mix.
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:08, Reply)
I also heard that the husband of the 30 year old woman
is playing away, so you could offer her a glass of pinot grigio (her sort always like Pinot Grigio) and a shoulder to cry on and then take her back to a cheap hotel for some filthy drunken sex.
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:10, Reply)
Awww well that's not me
I don't like wine... its for fruits. Fact.
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:13, Reply)
You don't like wine?
What, not at all? Really?
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:14, Reply)
Yup it all tastes of vinegar to me
and I'm not just drinking vinegar from a wine bottle... I've checked.
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:15, Reply)
That's crazy.
What do you drink then?
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:17, Reply)
Spirits
BEST OF ALL THE ALCOHOLS!
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:17, Reply)
I can usually be found sitting under a kitchen table untangling my tights,
sipping Bourbon out of an old sock with B69 for company.
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:21, Reply)
Awww you poor thing
no-one should have to put with that tosser.
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:22, Reply)
Its the drink that drives me to it sir!

(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:23, Reply)
Whenever someone congratulates me on something
they always buy me a bottle of wine as a present... when I receive their 'gift' I die a little bit inside.
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:17, Reply)
I'm going to remember this
and buy you some really nice wine and then suggest we drink it and then get really offended as you turn down my gift, then I'll drink all my nice wine and do a poo on your doorstep.
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:21, Reply)
Has this happened already?!
I'm pretty sure you've brought me wine at a house party and then pooed on my doorstep...
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:22, Reply)
Maybe, I don't really remember these things.
It's like it happens to another person.
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:25, Reply)
That's because it does happen to another person
You're not pooing on your own doorstep... or are you?!

(also I knew what you really meant I just wanted to take the piss out of you a little bit instead of confirming your split personality disorder which is brought on by alcohol consumption and gay dancing to Top Gun theme tunes).
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:29, Reply)
And either a mini cab driver or a gangster called Big Dave or something

(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:09, Reply)
Actually a taxi driver was my first thought
when reading 40 year old bald man who says "Cheer up"
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:11, Reply)
See
Stereotypes are marvellous things.
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:12, Reply)
Every millimeter my hairline recedes
makes me hate darkies just a little bit more.
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:10, Reply)
uuuuuuugggggghhhhhhhhhhhhh if I had a nickel for everytime someone said "why do you look so mean?" I'd be fucking rich
gee, I'm sorry, I can't help I was born with this face. Do you happen to walk about with a perpetual smile 24 fucking 7? I don't cocking think so.
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 16:59, Reply)
I can't believe anyone would see your gorgeous face walking by and say that.
I'm shocked. Merkins must be the rudest people on earth.
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:00, Reply)
The next time someone says that to you respond with...
'I'm not mean, I'm just thinking about where to hide all the bodies, I'm running out of room'... then watch them run.
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:02, Reply)
Just say
'because I AM fucking mean', and punch them in the tits/cock
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:18, Reply)
Cunt Punt

(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:21, Reply)
& Minge Dennis

(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:23, Reply)
HIYA FLIMZAH!

(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:27, Reply)
Alright chuckles
How goes it?
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:29, Reply)
Took the day off
Made a big mistake and went into town. Tired. Should've stayed home.
But yay I'm out tonight for vouchers dinner and a lil drink or two :)

How's you? Did you get your card?
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:31, Reply)
Hahaha bless you!
Did you get nice things in town?

I did indeed get my card thank you lovely, it was super!

Ooooh voucher dinner, cool stuff! :)
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:34, Reply)
Birthday present for my best mate
Sore feet
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:38, Reply)
Sore feet aren't nice things! :(

(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:41, Reply)
But it's very sunny and I'm going out tonight so I should shut it zip it can it

(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:43, Reply)
Jolly good!
You have good times tonight! :D
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:45, Reply)
That's a point,
Flim-Flam, has anything turned up in the post for you from me?
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:34, Reply)
It has indeed
I felt like I was on The Krypton Factor trying to get into the blasted thing! :D
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:35, Reply)
Did you have to pay £1.19?

(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:36, Reply)
Hahaha no dice
The post office sent us the post and asked us to pay the money... hahaha fool to the post office, we've already got the letter, why would we pay them now!! Hahaha
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:37, Reply)
That's happened to a few people.
Fucking post office BUSWANKERS.
(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:38, Reply)
POSTWANKERS!!

(, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 17:39, Reply)

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