Dream jobs, I've had a few:
1) Fast Jet pilot. STUPID SPAZZY EYES.
2) Play for the England Cricket team (Right Arm medium, batting at 3) AND Arsenal's first XI.
3) An actor of both Stage and Screen. Please thank you.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 7 May 2010, 12:13, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Oh yes
I wanted to be a helicopter pilot, but my eyes aren't perfect :(
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 7 May 2010, 12:16, Reply)

Where's Crow?
ACTOR BUMDER ALERT!
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 7 May 2010, 12:20, Reply)

I am more concerned about the similarities to Top Gun...
...which is the bumderest of all films.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 7 May 2010, 12:25, Reply)

A BUMDER, you say, DG?
*deep breath*
*pulls out dead horse and whip*

BUMDER ALERT. BUMDER ALERT. WE HAVE CONFIRMED SIGHTING OF ANOTHER BUMDER IN THE IMMEDIATE VICINITY. (I KNOW, ANOTHER ONE. THE PLACE IS CRAWLING WITH THE BUGGERS, EXCUSE THE PUN.) STAGE-ACTING BUMDER CONFIRMED IN THE OFF-TOPIC QUARTERS OF QOTW. THIS IS AN EMERGENCY. WATCH CLOSELY FOR THE BUMDER; HE IS AN ACTOR-TYPE AND MAY THEREFORE BE ABLE TO USE HIS ACTING SKILLS TO DISGUISE HIS EYE-WATERINGLY CAMP MINCING AND MANIPULATE YOUR TRUST TO GAIN ACCESS TO YOUR BOTTOM. EMERGENCY, EMERGENCY. BEWARE OF ACTOR-BUMDER. PROTECT YOUR COLONS. AVOID BEING BUMMED AT ALL COSTS (I'VE HEARD IT'S CONTAGIOUS).
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 7 May 2010, 12:27, Reply)

Good show, Crow.
Good show.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 7 May 2010, 12:29, Reply)

*takes a bow*
*suddenly remembers self and covers arse with a conveniently-placed square of sheet metal*
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 7 May 2010, 12:30, Reply)

When you do these rants...
...I imagine you shaking your arms about like the robot in Lost in Space.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 7 May 2010, 12:29, Reply)

I'm with Porkylips
and read it in a Holly voice. It cracks me up every sodding time.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 7 May 2010, 12:41, Reply)

Holly Valance?

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 7 May 2010, 12:42, Reply)

Holly
as in Red Dwarf computer (Hattie Hayridge version).
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 7 May 2010, 12:44, Reply)

Bloody hell.
That is a good call.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 7 May 2010, 12:46, Reply)

Haha
This one's getting a click for the preamble.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 7 May 2010, 12:50, Reply)

No matter how often it's posted
It just never ceases to be funny. To me, anyway.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 7 May 2010, 14:09, Reply)

I'll bum you in a minute.
And you'll enjoy it.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 7 May 2010, 12:34, Reply)

Ar the good old days
when a sportsman would play football in the winter and cricket in the summer
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 7 May 2010, 12:18, Reply)