I kind of agree with the theory
that all men are shit, but only with the addendum of all women are psychos.

Wiggy is shit, I'm a psycho. Only when you reach that nirvana of realisation can you truly be happy.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 10:51, 4 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

All women are mine?
I take no responsibility for them.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 10:53, Reply)

you wish
actually you wish for just one to be yours.

I meant that like you'd be lucky to even have one, I'm not dropping hints about it being a certain someone.

Ok in that second part, there was some hint dropping.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:07, Reply)

real subtle as well.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:11, Reply)

Well it's not exactly private knowledge.

( girlinthehole, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:12, Reply)

it's too subtle for me
what have i missed, who are you shagging, why don't i know about it, argh!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:14, Reply)

I'm not shagging anyone, people just like to gossip.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:15, Reply)

applebite
at a wild guess?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:17, Reply)

Female Intuition works again!

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:17, Reply)

He isn't shagging this person
Just he's teased a lot because he may want to.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:15, Reply)

Kurt Cobain?

(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:12, Reply)

I'm not a psycho.
Until I get dumped
( girlinthehole, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 10:54, Reply)

you just go on believing that

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 10:57, Reply)

It's true damn you.
I can get several written testements by exs that will prove it.

Edit - erm.....if I was speaking to them.
( girlinthehole, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 10:58, Reply)

I wouldn't accept such testimonies
as they would clearly be under duress.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 10:59, Reply)

duress the influence of my awesomeness.
( girlinthehole, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:08, Reply)

same thing

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:09, Reply)

I agree
I try to not be shit, but it's like trying to stop the tide. Women are all psycho mentalists though, but manage to hold it back most of the time (with varying degrees of success).
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 10:59, Reply)

Exactly
it's getting the balance right. Wiggy sometimes does utterly useless and dreadful things because he's an idiotboy, but I also like to rip his face off occasionally just because a pigeon flew at me when I was outside and that made me angry.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:06, Reply)

this is very familiar

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:10, Reply)

Yep!
I read somewhere that most conflicts come because women rant about something unfix-able, and men want to fix things (and maybe get frustrated when they have no advice to offer).
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:12, Reply)

yeah I had a huge fight with Wiggy a while ago
because he didn't want to come to a barbeque with my friends, he wanted to go to a different barbecue with his friends. I had a big blow up at him about how he doesn't like my friends (which isn't true) and then when that wasn't working I moved onto how he only wanted to go to this other barbeque so he could smoke weed because that's all he cares about (slightly true) and then when that didn't work either I started ranting about how the guy whose barbeque it was is a really shit friend and he shouldn't waste his time on him (this is very true). Eventually he just said "I love you and if you're upset about something we'll work it out" which made me have to admit that I was being a psycho. I hate when I have to do that.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:23, Reply)

are you sure you aren't going out with me?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:24, Reply)

maybe
I am your fiancee AICMFP.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:27, Reply)

naa
she'd rather come to the bbq with my friends and smoke weed
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:29, Reply)

to be honest I would have rather done that too
but I'd already agreed to go to this other barbeque. That's probably why I was so annoyed. Plus it was really sunny where we were and I had to leave that. As I was driving down the motorway I literally drove into a black cloud and then it started pissing it down. My rubbish barbeque was inside whilst he was posting pictures of how hot it was on Facebook.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:35, Reply)

that is annoying
it's been quite handy that, since moving to devon, my mrs has come to the conclusion that all her old friends were shit and that mine are better. this has made life much easier.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:36, Reply)

A lot of our friends are mutual by coincidence
but since moving to Manchester he's making a lot more friends through going to stoner parties so I'm adopting his more than the other way around.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:41, Reply)

a wise move
stoners are good people
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:42, Reply)

I've learned that, when the Lady is going off on one
To try not to get defensive and make things worse. Just suck it up, admit if I'm in the wrong, and try to find middle ground as quickly as possible.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:27, Reply)

You remind me of Allie, the lass who writes 'Hyperbole and a Half'
I constantly try to not be shit, but am incredibly forgetful. I do like doing little things to put a smile on the Lady's face (and I'm not referring to my penis) though. The Lady can be psycho at times, but I've learned how to cope with this (again, not referring to my penis here).
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:11, Reply)

I get this quite a lot
when I discovered the site and showed Wiggy he was like "it's like someone took the crap out of your head and made it slightly more legible".
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:23, Reply)

Brilliant!
Mind you, I thought the same but about me when I read it, I think that's why I like it so much.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:25, Reply)

I think most people think that way to a certain extent
the problem is that I verbalise it a lot of the time, resulting in weird looks.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:27, Reply)

Me too, me too
Friends and colleagues have accepted this by now. I keep meaning to start my comic up again, must find some inspiration...
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:29, Reply)

just watch me for a day
and call it the spaz diaries.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:33, Reply)

Sorry
z nk
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:37, Reply)

¬_¬

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:39, Reply)

It was a setup I couldn't ignore
Also, my comics are more rage-filled than laughing at spackered-ness.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:45, Reply)

I wouldn't perhaps say they hold it back
I'd say it's more they cover it up.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:13, Reply)

^this
most women have the ability to weigh up within nanoseconds all the possible scenarios that could play out if we say or do a certain thing at that moment. Unfortunately, that sometimes means that in one of the scenarios the boy will react in a certain way, which upsets the lady. This results in the lady being angry at the boy for doing something in the potential future. Like putting Schrodinger's foot in it.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:26, Reply)

putting Schrodinger's foot in it is a brilliant expression

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:29, Reply)

I thank you

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:33, Reply)

was that off the cuff
or had you used it before?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:34, Reply)

I just thinked it up right now
I haven't had much cause to use a phrase like that before now.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:39, Reply)

it was good
well done
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:41, Reply)

This is like a woman being pissed off with her boy
Because of something he did in a dream.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:35, Reply)

I do that a lot.
although it's more often that I feel guilty for dream cheating on him with Michael Buble.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:39, Reply)

I rarely remember my dreams
But have been scowled at because apparently I ignored the Lady in a dream. The following night I rolled over to see her facing me, clearly asleep, when she suddenly (but thankfully weakly) punched me in the face...
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:44, Reply)

I had an awesome dream last night.
There were zombies. Lots and lots of zombies.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:45, Reply)

I haven't had a zombie dream for a while
quite unusual for me
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:47, Reply)

I have one at least once a week.
Only, they're very rarely at the beginning of the outbreak, they're usually at the end, or when I'm the only human left.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:49, Reply)

mine are similar
I'm usually trying to get from one place to another, and having to get through or past pesky zombies
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:50, Reply)

The one I had the other night was really interesting actually.
The technology to make zombies had been discovered by this big corporation but leaked on the internet. Turns out you only needed a few easily obtained chemicals and an (un)willing volunteer to make them so every psycho was making them in their garden shed.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:55, Reply)

I had a zombie dream the other night
where the zombies were all the humans left after aliens had gassed them. The ones who didn't die became braindead zombies, except me
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:58, Reply)

I'm the same
only less zombies, more Michael Buble.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 12:01, Reply)

I don't understand this obsession most women seem to have with him.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 12:03, Reply)

me neither!
I don't even like him!! He just penetrates my dreams for no reason. I only saw him once on the Royal Variety Show and since then my subconscious keeps getting a wide on for him.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 12:07, Reply)

Sounds awesome!
My kind of dream.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:47, Reply)

It was probably because I went to see [REC] 2 on Saturday
(Which by the way is FUCKING AWESOME)
And then watched the Evil Dead when I came home.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:49, Reply)

Sounds like the best night evar!
I must see [REC]2, but I doubt the Lady will want to see it.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:52, Reply)

I went with my mate.
He loved it, but bit his nails all the way through to stop from screaming.
In the Odeon, they have tvs in the foyer with security feeds from each screen, I really hope all the people stood in the ticket queue got a good laugh out of me shitting myself and flailing around every time something scary happened.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:58, Reply)

that is a great idea

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 12:00, Reply)

I am a mental
Just in a slightly different way to most other psychotic women.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:42, Reply)

oh good you're here, I was just about to text you.
I have to move tomorrow's pole to Wednesday, 5-6pm, can you still make it?
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:45, Reply)

Oh noes!
No I can't, by then I'll already be drunk in a tent in field in the middle of Derby. :(
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 11:47, Reply)

I thought so.
Sorry, my other two can't do it tomorrow and I can't afford to run it without them. Sorry!
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 12:00, Reply)

No worries,
I was considering telling you I couldn't make it anyway cos I'm really short on funds at the moment.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 12:03, Reply)

nae bother
we're dancing to Alexandra Burke anyway so you won't miss much!
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 12:08, Reply)