Since TGB's not around...

What are you cunts having for lunch today?

Edit: seriously? None of you know dave the facts? Since I must be the only one here who's been around for more than two years, I'll explain;
In the olden days a user called the Duke of Prunes and a girl called Flowerpot would post a 'Dave the Facts' lunch thread every day, usually it contained some zany, but amusing made up fact about Dave the Hat (another old user) bending straight bananas and suchlike. They would respond to every reply with a hearty 'braw! Have chips with that'
I apologise sincerely for this going over all your heads, you useless shitcunts
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 12:42, 28 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

That looks and reads like it was made by someone very drunk.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 12:44, Reply)

Braw!
Have chips with that
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 12:48, Reply)

and someone not particularly amusing
or perhaps someone that used to be amusing but isn't any more.

and I don't really drink real ale. and I certainly don't drink lattes
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:05, Reply)

For the love of God
I was trying to pay tribute to the old Duke of Prunes lunch threads on /board, I'm terribly sorry if the facts were inaccurate.

Were you lot always such a massive bunch of humourless twunts? I thought it would make a nice change from the 'innocuous question - hundreds of dull answers' formula that's currently prevailing in this place
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:14, Reply)

I'm not familiar with the duke of prunes thing
yeah, we're humourless twunts. always have been, always will be.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:19, Reply)

It's as B3ta as Jessie naked
Jolly Jack's cartoon time, and Dave the Hat's puns. Search 'dave the facts', it was amusing in its day
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:22, Reply)

not there any more unfortunately
I found a link, but nothing on the end of it :-(
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:38, Reply)

Search on /board for 'braw, have chips with that'
You'll find one eventually, the only one I could get hold of was about bending naners, and it made me chuckle.

If you'd been there at the time, you might have found this thread slightly less confusing and tedious
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:45, Reply)

that is probably correct
despite having been on here for years, I've never really looked at much board stuff other than the competitions


edit: only things that come up on search are from you
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:48, Reply)

Lies on toast
with motherfucking chips
( broadsword, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 12:53, Reply)

For fuck's sakes link it you cockmunch.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 12:54, Reply)

If you want text only, go to /talk
Or click ignore, you whinging, shit-for-brains, bald-headed twat-faced cunt
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:03, Reply)

No, tell him what you really think.
Don't hold back now
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:17, Reply)

Nah, no more whingers on /talk, ta

( broadsword, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:28, Reply)

Little scrote-sucking shitebag
How dare he think he can test me?
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:47, Reply)

How you lactate wee?
I'm a little confused.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:11, Reply)

I knew one of you would pick up on this
It's not supposed to make sense
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:17, Reply)

lolwaki

(PsychoChomp, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:24, Reply)

If you don't know Dave the Facts
You're not worth knowing
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:27, Reply)

I ate croissants for breakfast this morning. I thought you lot would like to know
I can't see the pic that's causing all the consternation, but I'm sure it's fabulous
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:20, Reply)

MOTHER FUCKING HOME MADE SALAD BOWL WITH LOADS OF BEATROOT MOTHERFUCKERS YEEEE-HAW !
Oh man, I forgot how much I love a nice bit of salad on a hot day.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:33, Reply)

Braw!
Have chips with that, and thanks for playing along
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:49, Reply)

er...
it's hardly our fault that you're not funny.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:43, Reply)

Er... I think you'll find that it is, actually
If you'd been here 3 years ago you would have at least found this mildly amusing, and as for 'funny', none of you moaning little cocksuckers would know funny if it slapped you in the face with its dripping, turgid cock.

This place is a chatroom, nothing else, you're all very dull, your threads are inane, and I was trying to add a little variety, but I apologise wholeheartedly, you can all fuck off back to your dull little threads.
This place used to have potential, shame really
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:53, Reply)

it's the same as it always has been
some people know each other better now, but that's about it. there's still the same mix of funny and not, and the same level of abuse, but if anything that has been funnier of late.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:56, Reply)

Well it seems very different to me
It's probably because I'm looking from the outside in, but the place seems to have lost all of its funny, I mean just look at the popular page, it makes me sad
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:59, Reply)

I can see where you are coming from (cameras are everywhere)
but I think it is still pretty much as it was. some stuff is only funny if you are involved in it I think.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 14:10, Reply)

Levi Roots Reggae Reggae Chicken with Butternut Squash Rice
OM NOM NOM would eat again.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:51, Reply)

Braw!
Have chips with that
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:54, Reply)

chips and rice
CARBOTASTIC!
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 14:07, Reply)

moroccan chicken soup
and granary bread

it was good. very good.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:53, Reply)

Way back when
They had a flashing, animated gif for the lunch of the day, but I can't find it.

I'm going to award this the LUNCH OF THE DAY though, just for the sheer confusion it has caused
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:57, Reply)

confusion? how so?
I'm honoured though
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 13:59, Reply)

Because it seems that absolutely no-one knows what I was getting at
Dave the facts obviously wasn't as well known as I tthought, I was hoping for at least a rofl
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 14:02, Reply)

ah
I thought you meant my lunch was confusing
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 14:09, Reply)

Dave the Hat?
I used to thoroughly enjoy his series of animations that ended with variations upon the theme of 'Unexpected Horse.' What happened to him?
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 14:10, Reply)

He was driving the car that hit Jessie
They've banged him up for life
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 14:12, Reply)

Hi
I remember Dave the Facts and I did a chuckle. Just so you don't entirely lose your faith in humanity.
( Kroney, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 15:15, Reply)

Too. Fucking. Late.

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 15:55, Reply)

i also remember them
from about a millions years ago
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 7 Jun 2010, 17:09, Reply)