I discovered something fantastic!
When the bf is a bit tipsy, I only have to point at him and ask "Who is the dancing queen?" For him to start dancing. Brilliant.

Which awesome power do you have?

And ok, it's about time so, what are you having for lunch?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:14, 74 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I have the power of SPENDING
For no matter how much I get paid, I'm always skint by the second weekend of the month!

Although I've come into some money this month, so I've bought a memory foam mattress for £130, a 1Tb external HDD for £70 & My Bloodstock ticket for about £90, as a friend gets them cheap
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:15, Reply)

I've realized that
since I'm living with mark, I spend 6 times more than before. I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw our last statement!
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:18, Reply)

I have the power of FAILING TO CONVINCE PEOPLE THAT I'M STRAIGHT
as you might have noticed
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:18, Reply)

That's a good power because
...

...

It sucks?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:19, Reply)

Pretty much
It's not a useful superpower to have, but it does seem to be pretty all-encompassing
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:24, Reply)

My bf is called gay all the time as well
His friends always make fun of him because of it (in a nice way)

However, he's always surrounded by girls, contrary to any of his friends.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:27, Reply)

Do you laugh while shoving your strap-on up him?

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:28, Reply)

Hahaha!
Well, anal sex can be very satisfying for men, straight men too. Not that he'd let me try, though.

It's more the way he dances. He's so funny.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:30, Reply)

So I understand!
Never been asked to partake though.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:31, Reply)

Ask your girlfriend
Just start with a finger, and very slowly. You might get shocked the first time.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:32, Reply)

She wouldn't do it
But thanks all the same!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:32, Reply)

Shame
That's were your G-spot is.

I don't know if you've ever got a girl coming on 2 places at the same time, shaking and stretching and twisting with the pleasure.

You can get the same by being massaged on your gspot and having a bj at the same time.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:35, Reply)

Yep!
And yes I have, it made me very proud!
I'm not against the idea of trying.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:36, Reply)

I think you should
But you need someone gentle the first time. The first time you'll probably be so stressed about the wrongness of it that you might no enjoy it much.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:37, Reply)

Something that feels that good can never be wrong : )
I've been told.
( girlinthehole, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:40, Reply)

Exactly
If it's not suppose to feel good, then, why is it there?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:43, Reply)

Haha!
You're going to embarres him. He's very shy.
( girlinthehole, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:36, Reply)

I'm less shy online than IRL
So there!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:37, Reply)

I won't talk about it IRL
I've learned the British ways, and how shy you're about sex.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:38, Reply)

Bah, sex is one of my favourite topics to talk about!
I'm only shy when first meeting people, once I've had a cider or two I'll be reet!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:40, Reply)

Yeah, most of my best friends are girls
and most of them are hot. There are plenty of upsides to ballet
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:31, Reply)

Exactly
Let them laugh at you. They're just jealous because you're the only one who can have a conversation with a hot girl without shaking, and the hot girl seems to enjoy talking with you.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:33, Reply)

Bumder

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:27, Reply)

Mad dog



That is a shit insult, sorry
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:30, Reply)

It's a shit nickname too
I just prefer it to my previous one
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:32, Reply)

You obviously have to tell us what that was

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:36, Reply)

It was Beefcake

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:44, Reply)

That could not be more opposite than Noel's suggestion
which I think we all thought was more likely
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:47, Reply)

Irony?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:49, Reply)

Meant like Cartman in the South Park episode
Because I'm fat.

My friends aren't the brightest sparks, bless em
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:58, Reply)

Ladyboy.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:37, Reply)

If I say the word "heatwave" to a friend
She has to dance like a hula girl and say "I've got my island in da sun".
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:21, Reply)

That is so funny!
But I need to see to believe.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:21, Reply)

I think she'd kill me if I recorded it

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:22, Reply)

It'd be worth it

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:23, Reply)

You want me dead?
Harsh!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:25, Reply)

I don't want you dead!
But think of the fun we'd have
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:27, Reply)

The fun you'd have if I were dead?
So so mean...
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:28, Reply)

: (
I'm sorry. I'm just thinking of the good of the many.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:29, Reply)

So I'm detrimental to many people?
That's the nicest thing anyone's said to me!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:29, Reply)

Sorry to break it to you
However, I think you're not going to record her, so you don't need to die just now.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:31, Reply)

I have the power to get my nephew to sing Hammer Time.
Just by asking him what time is it.

I also have an invisible forcefield that repels all human males.
( girlinthehole, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:23, Reply)

At least it comes with a delay
and you can enjoy them for a while before repelling them.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:24, Reply)

That only seems to work with cunts.

( girlinthehole, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:26, Reply)

Yeah, but they're not cunts until the repellant starts working
so you can still enjoy them.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:28, Reply)

Try beastiality

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:43, Reply)

I have a tute during lunchtime
and don't think I could eat anyway
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:26, Reply)

Still doing special k diet?

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:28, Reply)

I broke it yesterday
and stuffed my face with large quantities of food.

However being ill, it all came back up again.

So I might still be on track
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:34, Reply)

I see
I had too many biscuits yesterday. Today I'm trying to compensate, but it's so difficult.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:36, Reply)

Bulimia for the thin!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:38, Reply)

Hahaha!

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:42, Reply)

it wasn't on purpose
therefore it doesn't count
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:43, Reply)

Oh, were you trying to train out your gag reflex?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:44, Reply)

no
I was being violently sick thanks to a stomach bug

the gag reflex was just a plus
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:45, Reply)

Oh dear, I don't think I want a blow job anymore

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:45, Reply)

pukey blowjobs are the best
You should definitely give it a go
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 14:06, Reply)

I don't think the giver would think the same.

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 14:07, Reply)

When you say "Hispaniola" to my ex
he jumps up and clicks his fingers. Side effect from being in a play where thye had to do that.
He almost got arrested for wandering the streets of Edinburgh in his pyjamas.
Fuckin' actors.

My power is to fail to accomplish plans.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:34, Reply)

That's brilliant!
The hispaniola thing.

Write a list with your plans. Lists are good for you.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:37, Reply)

The plan for today was to get out of bed and go shopping. It failed.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:41, Reply)

That is pretty rubbish, pick yourself up woman, you know you'll feel better
for some fresh air by achieving something.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:42, Reply)

I can't even bring myself to get out and go for a fag.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:44, Reply)

Do it, go and smoke, I command you!
Then fuck the fuck off of to the shitting shops and buy me some cunting jaffa cakes!
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:45, Reply)

I'm going home in a couple of days.
There might be dangerous repercussions over something.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:46, Reply)

Might be, being the important part

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:47, Reply)

Yes
You don't need a list for that! Just get up and go shopping!
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:43, Reply)

It'd help if people texted back :(

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:44, Reply)

Don't let yourself down for someone stupid
You'll regret not using your time better when you have a job and have to be in an office 40h/week.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:47, Reply)

I guess :D
I'm going to be leaving London for a few days in 2 days, I better use my time better.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:51, Reply)

Exactly
Why are you going to London? For how long?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:51, Reply)

No no, I'm in London at the moment
I'm going home to Manchester for some TLC and to see the family. Dunno how long just yet, probably about 4 days.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:59, Reply)

Ah, I see
Leaving London, not Leaving to London.

4 days is not much, I'm sure you'll deal with whatever is in here.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 8 Jun 2010, 14:05, Reply)

Better had...

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 8 Jun 2010, 13:52, Reply)