Oh Gonz
I hate the type of people you CANNOT get rid of.
There's one comes in here, shows us his memoirs, (load of incoherent shite) and tells us the reason nobody will publish them is because they are racist. Anyonw who tells him to stop bugging them and let them eat their lunch/write their essay/have a nap in peace is also racist.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 13:50, 3 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Ohhhh, yeah', she knows a jewish man, asked me if I knew him, that I could be related, 'cus we all 'stick to your own', that she likes the jews, but only the ones who don't control banks.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 13:52, Reply)

antisemiticlolz

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 13:53, Reply)

Oh Roota, why can't I meet a girl who doesn't want to feed me undisclosed tablets from an anominous jar.
=(
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 13:58, Reply)

You're giving out the wrong signals
like 'sympathetic non-banker Jew'
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 14:04, Reply)

But, but, but, IT'S NOT MY FAULY.
I can't help it that when they chopped off the end of my schmeckle, they made me the MD of Major International Banking Corp©, with no leaving options. Gawd, next time we all meet up, I'm going to bring the subject up with The Edlers of the Jewish Council, it'll try and shoe-horn it between "Balldozing houses" and "Telling everyone what they can watch on the telly".
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 14:14, Reply)

Gonz, I have to tell you that "balldozing" is fucking brilliant.
New favourite euphemism.
"Did you kick her back doors in?"
"Yeah, I totally balldozed her conservatory!"
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 14:23, Reply)

Haha

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 14:29, Reply)

There was a guy in his 60's who used to sit in Peebles Theatre sipping coffee
Called the Lunatic Writer. He used to sit and talk to himself in a very posh voice. I once heard him say, "Of course, they didn't know I had trained as a ninja."
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 13:52, Reply)

We have some poet cunt in town
Forces his shit poems on you and won't go away when you're sitting in a cafe with your mate clearly having an intimate cry and that.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 13:56, Reply)

Bastard poets and their invasive ways
*shakes fist*
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 14:02, Reply)

The memoirs are racist or the publishers?

(PsychoChomp, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 13:56, Reply)

the publishers and anyone who reads them without declaring them the life story of a genius

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 13:56, Reply)

I really want to sit down and write a 500 page book that is utterly shit
I'll have chapters that have no context to the rest of the book, ridiculous sex scenes a battle between dragons and aliens. Maybe have an evil twin involved somewhere. All characters will be contemptable cunts.
Just to send it off to publishers and ask for constructive criticism.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 14:03, Reply)

That sounds a bit like Ulysses.

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 14:11, Reply)

I hated that cartoon.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 14:16, Reply)

Impressed
Somehow (knowing nothing about you) I thought you were too young to have seen the (obviously brilliant) Ulysees 31
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 14:17, Reply)

Ah', I'm 26, when it was around, I might have been to young to really enjoy it.
But the tune pissed me off, I liked the idea of gods and robots and shit like that, but the whole "Are we home yet?" thing grated on me, and it seemed that if you didn't watch the previous ones in order, nothing would make sense.

I hated that freaky plasticine thing too, with Mark Twain and the elevator.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 14:28, Reply)

Not only do you remember it
but in better detail than I do

I just recall it being probably the most unrelentingly depressing cartoon I'd ever seen. When I was 8
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 14:31, Reply)

Coolio, those are the only details I remember.
I think he was trying to save his daughter or wife or something, or they got killed, but I might be mixing that up with God Of War (the video game)
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 14:46, Reply)