I dislike my inability to decide whether I’m at the hugging stage with people I meet.
I’ll either not hug them at all and they’ll get all offended, or I’ll hug them and they’ll be all like ‘OMGEE I didn’t realise we were at the hugging stage in this friendship’, then I get all embarrassed and hide in a tree.
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 26 Jul 2010, 14:57, 7 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

OMG THIS
I never know if it's appropriate after meeting someone once, or twice. I love hugs, but don't want to put a foot wrong, y'know? And then I end doing the 'going-in-for-a-hug, wait-they're-not-moving, now-they're leaning-the-wrong-way' awkward dance.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 14:59, Reply)

The worst bit is the side-kiss-cheek moment too
they go in for a kiss, you go in for a hug, you end up nutting them in the face hole!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:02, Reply)

oh I've done that
And some friends do two kisses, continental style.
Plus, are you supposed to actually kiss their cheek, or just air-kiss while your cheeks are touching? Some do it one way, some the other.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:03, Reply)

I know
I've yet to come to a conclusion as to you're supposed to air kiss or actually kiss. I might just start licking peoples faces, that way avoiding the whole mess, no one would come anywhere near me then!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:05, Reply)

Or, cup them slightly as you kiss/air-kiss

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:08, Reply)

Hahaha
I like this option.
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:09, Reply)

wait...
that's not a generally accepted greeting?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:05, Reply)

Maybe in Manchester?

(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:05, Reply)

I'll bear that in mind
if I'm ever unfortunate enough to have to go there
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:06, Reply)

Ditto!
:)
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:08, Reply)

also, I may give you a slight headbutting when/if we meet

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:08, Reply)

I look forward to it sir!

(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:09, Reply)

madam
*doffs cap*
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:12, Reply)

oi

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:08, Reply)

*nuts*

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:08, Reply)

Arf!

(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:08, Reply)

or when you are not
quite ready for the hug and end up doing an awkward side hug. And if you do hug, how hard do you hug? Some times I got for OTT manly pat on the back, it's the only way
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:05, Reply)

If I ever meet you I'm totally going to go in for hugging just one of your legs
to make it super extra awkward.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:08, Reply)

ARGH!
social etiquette is so confusing
wait...are you some kind of dog, dogs hug legs
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:10, Reply)

I'm a kitty
we hug legs too.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:49, Reply)

just hug me, I won't mind

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:03, Reply)

But... but
then people wold have to TOUCH you. I don't think I could bring myself to do it
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:05, Reply)

did we not hug?
damn, I missed out
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:05, Reply)

We hugged
You totally loved it
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:09, Reply)

I bet you did too
I'm great at hugging
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:10, Reply)

and headbutting?!

(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:12, Reply)

not really done enough to make a judgement as to my level of ability

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:13, Reply)

Lets just say ‘adequate’ for now then! :)

(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:14, Reply)

it is certainly fit for my needs

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:17, Reply)

Cool, one man-hug it is

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:06, Reply)

this!
I like hugging friends, but you're never sure, even with old friends. Man, it's a minefield
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 14:59, Reply)

My oldest friend isn't a hugger
and she's really petite so I like to hug her and look down at the top of her head, knowing she hates it.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:09, Reply)

One of my male friends HATES hugs
He actually runs away from them. I've also seen him throw a drunken friend who was insisting on a hug.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:11, Reply)

We are at the hugging stage.

( thealternativefact, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:00, Reply)

I hoped so
To be honest even if we wern't I'd still hug you anyways! ;-)
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:01, Reply)

:D

( thealternativefact, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:02, Reply)

Yesterday I hugged my friend's mum hello but not goodbye
It was awkward
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:01, Reply)

See that is awkward too!
I think rules should be made or people should have to wear stickers outlining their preference.
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:03, Reply)

BADGER IS AVAILABLE FOR HUGS AND GROPING

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:04, Reply)

Noted!
*scribbles down for next meeting*
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:06, Reply)

I think I saw you wearing that on a sandwich board in town

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:09, Reply)

And do you kiss them on the left cheek first, on the right cheek first? two kisses or one? When you go in for the hug do you make the kiss sound or just kindda rub cheeks?
Is it creepy to sniff their hair and sigh? What if it's a bloke, (and you're a bloke), is that cool? How firm should your handshake be? If it's a long lingering hug and you get a stiffy, do you point it out or hope they don't notice? .... I wouldn't want to miss a potential, but I wouldn't want the embarassment if I'm wrong about this one. "bye", "Toodles", "love you", "catch you later".... what one do you use? Did they really say "Love you" or did I miss hear it? I'd hate to say "Love you too" and they didn't say that to begin with, I did that once at school to a teacher, lucky Dan was wearing his sister's socks that day so he got dissed more than me.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:12, Reply)

I hear ya gonz

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:17, Reply)

Sometimes when someone goes in for the kiss, I kindda bowel my head down so they kiss my forehead 'cus the only one who kisses me is my mum.
And that's fine for her, how it should be, but then the rare time someone else does it's like an automatic reaction to do that, and it all goes a bit weird for a little while.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:20, Reply)

Maybe there should be no more hugs
and only handshakes, although that is a new problem as you have the crushers and the people whose hands just seem to slide through yours. Then as a lady you have the issue of do you crush their hand back which seems to say 'I are mean businesses' or 'I are have testicles' or do you do the wishy-washy handshake which seems to say 'I heart kittums' or 'DON'T BREAK ME I'M FRAGILE'.
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:25, Reply)

I fucking hate limp handshakes
I'm not a bone-crusher, but if someone gives me a limp handshake it means you have to do it back, which offends me.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:27, Reply)

I've been informed
I give good handshakes for a girl, but I'm not really sure what that means or if its a good thing!?!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:29, Reply)

beefy handshake every time
don't let them see weakness. But do stop squeezing if they are all limp handed and feel like their bones are going to crush
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:28, Reply)

I like the idea of going back 200 years, and the bloke gets down on his knee, takes his hand in hers, and kisses her on the [other side of the palm] bit.
Not much veration on that, rules are; No Slobbering; Peck not Kiss; left knee down; gental all the time.

Simple, unless it's raining or wet out.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:29, Reply)

See someone would always take it too far and end up
eating a hand or sticking it down the front of their trousers. Trufacts.
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:30, Reply)

Can't really stick it down the front of his trousers, if he's on one knee and she's standing up, unless she's some sort of primate.
In which case, he's a sicko and it's best to realise this before you make company with them.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:33, Reply)

i misread
your misspelling of 'gentle' as 'genital'
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:30, Reply)

hah

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:34, Reply)

Exacta!
Its a minefield out there maaaaan!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:19, Reply)

There is no manual for this kind of thing that they hand out somewhere between being a kid and being a socially awquard teenager.
Sad Times.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:21, Reply)

i think some people must get a handbook
they always get these thing right and don't blush when almost strangers hug them.
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:23, Reply)

I should write some software or something that'll help for this.
*adds it to The Idea's Board*
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:25, Reply)

"... lucky Dan was wearing his sister's socks that day so he got dissed more than me."
This man is a genius.
(Cave Duck, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:25, Reply)

"It was dark, my sister was still asleep [he shared a room with her], couldn't turn the light on and I had my paper round"
he explained to us.

I ain't spoken to him for months, I might call him up, his nickname was "morgan" for at least 3 weeks.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:32, Reply)

If you ever dare hug me I'll get a restraining order.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:28, Reply)

Ha!
What makes you think I'd want to? Hmmmmmm...
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:31, Reply)

Oh nothing, I was just warning you of possible criminal action.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:33, Reply)

Fair enough
I haven't seen you for yonks anyways, I miss out on bash information by being aloof!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:38, Reply)

Well if you and your bloke ever happen to be in MK I will take you to one of the many wonderful chain bars.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:51, Reply)

I was the same at the bash
I thought a quick hug for the girls, handshake for the lads, before I was jumped on by BK for a massive man hug.

It felt good.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:31, Reply)

Awww
Massive man hugs are fun!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:41, Reply)

This is true

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 26 Jul 2010, 15:45, Reply)