and i will be whinging all day about what
the inept butcher in the brand new beauty salon i made the naive mistake of trusting a very intimate wax to last night has done to me.

you know all is really not well when the waxer looks up at you and says "i'm sorry i have got the wax stuck and now you are bruising so badly that i can't really continue." which is worse... BRUISING? THERE ??? or a hollywood wax that is only 3/4 finished??

needless to say i think it has to be the latter and have booked into a different salon to rectify the damage this lunchtime, but it has not been a great start to my weekend!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 3 Sep 2010, 9:48, 3 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Pre-pubescent looking snatch FTW!

( girlinthehole, Fri 3 Sep 2010, 9:50, Reply)

not at the moment
it's more like a reverse brazilian!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 3 Sep 2010, 9:55, Reply)

The last one I got was slightly off centre. It made me look unbalanced.

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 3 Sep 2010, 9:59, Reply)

wait a minute, reverse brazilian?
so the landing strip is on the outside?!
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 3 Sep 2010, 10:00, Reply)

UNDERNEATH
it has to go, bruising or not!!!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 3 Sep 2010, 10:08, Reply)

aww like a tiny little doormat?
hehe
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 3 Sep 2010, 10:09, Reply)

YES
good analogy!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 3 Sep 2010, 10:26, Reply)

On the "barson bridge" #vizquote

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Fri 3 Sep 2010, 10:13, Reply)

We're threatening to wax our flatmate
he's being all tough and "Oh I can take my pain, it's alright".

I usually take about 15 painkillers before I let hot wax anywhere near my body.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 3 Sep 2010, 9:52, Reply)

I had my chest done for a dare. It wasn't too bad, the hot wax hurt more going on than the strips coming off.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 3 Sep 2010, 9:57, Reply)

the hotter the wax the more your pores open up so the less it hurts to remove the hair
tru(if boring)fax
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 3 Sep 2010, 9:59, Reply)

I once got bruised down there during a wax and she had to stop
and it was a day before my holiday, I was well pissed off, the bit between thigh and lady part was dark purple, from a distance it looked like I had more hair than to start with. Bitch. She was awful, she used to put the wax on, then put the strip on, she'd be about to pull it off so I'd brace myself and then she'd stop and tell me a story about her nephew. It was torture.

I've got a really good one now, in and out in minutes and not that painful. Although depending on which girl you get you have to get into some rather undignified positions!
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 3 Sep 2010, 9:57, Reply)

Sorry to continue the painful subject but
why does the bruising occur? Are they pressing really hard or is it just the hair being removed that causes it?
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Fri 3 Sep 2010, 10:04, Reply)

It winks at them so they punch it.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 3 Sep 2010, 10:06, Reply)

hahahaha

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 3 Sep 2010, 10:08, Reply)

It's the pulling of the skin around the hair.
You're supposed to pull the skin tight before ripping the fabric strip off, but if you don't, it just tugs the skin really hard, which causes loads of little blood blisters, turning the skin purple. It tends to happen when the waxer isn't sharp enough with the ripping of the fabric, or if she pulls the strip upwards perpendicular to the skin rather than peeling it downwards.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 3 Sep 2010, 10:08, Reply)

yes
i look as if i have been knifed in the left thigh. i've never experienced anything like this before and i have had many many waxes!

stupid incompetent. why can't people just do their jobs??
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 3 Sep 2010, 10:09, Reply)

I've had it a couple of times with aforementioned rubbish waxer, she just wasn't quick enough
She was quite 'mature' shall we say, so maybe she was worried about hurting me. The young fake-tanned, bleached and false-eyelashed ladies of the salon I go to now are vicious enough to be really good.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 3 Sep 2010, 10:15, Reply)

Ouch
I see
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Fri 3 Sep 2010, 10:15, Reply)

I thought you'd know that being a official doctor fighter pilot.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 3 Sep 2010, 10:18, Reply)

Didn't get to do much waxing in the TA
and Big Eric wasn't that fussy.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Fri 3 Sep 2010, 10:37, Reply)