Shucks!
*blushes*
( girlinthehole, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:14, 1 reply, 15 years ago)

I popped into Lampito's birthday drinks in town last night.
I've never felt so old in my fucking life.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:16, Reply)

Haha!
Did they think you were her dad?
( girlinthehole, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:24, Reply)

Her drunken, rapey dad, yes.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:33, Reply)

Did you tell her mate that everyone on here knows she likes anal?

(PsychoChomp, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:50, Reply)

I bet that,
every time they mentioned 'Facebook', 'MP3s' or got their mobile phones out a piece of you died.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:25, Reply)

It was like an episode of 'Skins'*


*I have never seen an episode of 'Skins'
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:30, Reply)

I instantly dislike them all
(I have only seen a trailer for Skins, and am exceptionally judgmental).
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:31, Reply)

I like the cut of your jib.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:32, Reply)

Did it look like Lampito was having a good time?
Was she steaming drunk, shouting loudly, and haymaker-ing random men?
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:35, Reply)

She was rather demure and well-behaved.
Her hair looked rather nice too. It was all a bit confusing.

I'm sure it all went to shit later on but there was only so much 'Skins' a man can take so I fucked off by about ten.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:37, Reply)

Cool
Any other b3tans there? Or were you stood to one side, awkwardly sipping on your cognac, occasionally overhearing some slip of a girl say "Who's the guy in the History costume over there?"?
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:40, Reply)

Hahah
Himjim, Lusty & Crow were there. Everyone else was from 'Skins'.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:42, Reply)

;)

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:42, Reply)

Seriously though
'Skins' types fuck me right off, they seem to be having the teenage years I didn't. Mainly promiscuous sex, I did the booze and loud music.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:44, Reply)

Same here, but plus the drugs.
I really wasn't that interested in girls until I started taking ecstasy.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:47, Reply)

I was interested
But the token goth guy, who girls confided in but never fucked.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:49, Reply)

Unlucky.
You know that means they thought you were a bender, don't you?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:50, Reply)

Probably
Although a few have since told me they fancied me 'back then'.
Why the FUCK didn't you let me know?! Talking about how shit your boyfriend is to you is NOT a good way to flirt.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:51, Reply)

nothing more frustrating than
someone telling you 'ooh I really fancied you back then'
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:59, Reply)

AMEN

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 10:01, Reply)

especially when they're someone
you would've. Not so bad when you think 'thank God you didn't tell me'
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 10:02, Reply)

Yep, had both the narrow escapes
And the knuckle-chewing frustions.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 10:05, Reply)

Plus there is always the slight element of insult
'what do you mean you liked me back THEN'
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 10:06, Reply)

They've always told me about their past crush on me
When I've been securely ensconced in a relationship. No fear of me rejecting them then.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 10:07, Reply)

People are too complex
Makes me wonder who in five years time, who I know now will turn round and say 'oh I had a crush on you back then'
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 10:11, Reply)

thought know
(Bazongaloid, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:53, Reply)

^This
Got a lot of "You're such a great guy, you can have any girl you want" while wiping the snot from the nose of the object of my affections.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:53, Reply)

Infuriating, isn't it?
Still, I'm over that now*.
*clearly not over it
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:55, Reply)

You've both got hot girlfriends now so stop whinging.

( girlinthehole, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:57, Reply)

:-)

(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:58, Reply)

I am never content!
I'll never be able to let go of all the 'might haves' and 'could have beens'.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 10:02, Reply)

The "Could have beens"
Would probably have led to forty five minutes of vanilla sex and then a lifetime of awkwardness afterward. That's the best way to look at it...
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 24 Sep 2010, 10:11, Reply)

Forty-five minutes?!
If you include fumbling with the bra strap, giving up and using the garden shears, fumbling with a condom, losing the erection, explaining that it will come back if you give me a minute and stop judging me, awkward heavy petting, finally achieving full mast, 2 minutes of trying o find the right hole, before one glorious minute of manic thrusting before getting stitch and having to stop.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 10:17, Reply)

make a note of them
if it goes wrong in the next few years, turn up on their doorsteps
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 10:14, Reply)

Verbal contract innit.
Give teh sex NAO!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 10:17, Reply)

Ha!
Yep, but since I stopped attempting to date emotionally fragile women it got much easier.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:58, Reply)

Hmmm, Crow was there eh?
So, was it nice seeing your girlfriend?
(Bazongaloid, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:44, Reply)

He really has got a cock like a gorilla's arm, you know.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:46, Reply)

Is that why his wrists are so weak
through overuse?
(Bazongaloid, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:50, Reply)

All his bodily strength
is needed simply to transport his love truncheon aroun: this leaves other areas (such as the wrists) weak and flappy.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 9:53, Reply)

I think of it less as a 'love truncheon'
than a 'mighty pilum of justice and vindication.'

Good morning, sweetheart x
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 10:12, Reply)

Conversely
He has arms like a gorilla's cock.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 10:14, Reply)

...and wrists like two old wings of skate.

(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 10:15, Reply)