What do you do?
There's a barrister on my street whose reg is GUILTY. Smug cunt. It's an Audi, obv.

I don't get angry, I'm well calm all the time.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 11:23, 3 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

O_O
What. WhatwhatwhatwhatWHAT?!

That is the mot ridiculous thing I've ever heard.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 11:24, Reply)

I could be zen.
Not really. Everything makes me angry or upset ON or OFFLINE.

Right now it's the fucking phone which won't stop goddamn ringing and I'm the only one in the room.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 11:27, Reply)

That's just a little bit ridiculous.
I don't often get angry, I just get wound up or upset. But I do scare people when I get angry.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 11:28, Reply)

I have short angry bursts and then I'm calm again.
I'm just passionate.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 11:44, Reply)

When phones ring
You're supposed to answer them.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 11:30, Reply)

shut your face.
I don't want to speak to the clients, they're unclean.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 11:45, Reply)

Listen, toots
It's your job to answer the phones. Read your cone-tract.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 11:58, Reply)

It's true.
Although since the new secretary started, she thought it was her job to answer them before me and I just let her think that, so I deserve this really. She's back in the room now so I've resumed looking at the phone with contempt whilst it trills.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 12:03, Reply)

"She's back in the room"
Practicing hypnosis on underlings is fun! I treat my underlings well, and only occasionally remind them of their place at my feet.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 12:05, Reply)

no fair, I want underlings
although technically she is my junior, I feel bad ordering her around.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 12:20, Reply)

To be honest
I treat everyone who's technically my junior with respect and kindness. I do store all their emails within a folder entitled "Minions" though.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 12:23, Reply)

you should try answering the phone
that generally stops it ringing
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 11:31, Reply)

I hear if you pick the phone up
The ringing magically stops
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 11:33, Reply)

Looks like you all went to the same stand up class

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 11:45, Reply)

Nope, the only thing we share is a fear of the ladies of /OT
Just not you
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 11:46, Reply)

I'm well scary
KITTY SMASH!
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 11:50, Reply)

Nahh

Not that scary.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 11:52, Reply)

Yeah that's about as scary as I get.
If you make me really mad I level up to this:

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 12:05, Reply)

This is me at my worst

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 12:08, Reply)

oh man that's gross.
He has a worrying nipple:boob ratio.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 12:13, Reply)

I was going to go for lunch
but I don't much feel like eating now. That's really quite horrifying.
(berk, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 12:18, Reply)

*Down, Down-towards, towards - punch*

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 12:40, Reply)

I like how you didn't respond to my comment saying the same thing
because of how much you love me
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 11:51, Reply)

If you pick it up it stops ringing.
Timing -The key to good comedy.
(Cave Duck, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 11:54, Reply)

Earthly humour
Not funny
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 11:58, Reply)

I let yours go because it was gentle affectionate joking
whereas the other two were being malicious and evil.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 12:07, Reply)

I was just joining in with the other kids!

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 12:10, Reply)

You're so easily led.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 12:20, Reply)

Digital Forensics
Uh huh, no 'Kitty SMASH' style rages or rants? *coughs*bullshit!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 11:25, Reply)

I think you'll find I'm a highly motivated, low maintenance awesome eagle

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 11:27, Reply)

Haha nice!
But no.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 11:30, Reply)

I'm not approving of your hatred towards Audi drivers
AGAIN
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 11:30, Reply)

You should talk to your audi peers, they're giving you a bad name by being such dreadfully conceited and arrogant drivers
AUDI DRIVER HAS NO NEED TO INDICATE
FOR AUDI DRIVER THERE ARE NO OTHER CARS
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 11:46, Reply)

I always indicate
Although some cunt in an audi was right up my arse on the way to work I was all like
DUDE I'M IN AN AUDI AND I THINK YOU'RE A CUNT FFS
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 12:13, Reply)

haha
My sister drives an Audi and she indicates so I guess you're not all bad. However, she has become a much more aggressive driver since she got the Audi, she drives up people's arses on the motorway if they don't want to speed as much as her.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 12:21, Reply)