Strange you should ask...
an ex of mine just called round for a cuppa, she was moaning about not having had any for some months now, I said ditto (not literally, obv.), there was an awkward silence...she's now left. Not sure that I did or didn't do the right thing there. Still - LET HER BEG ME which will doubtless never happen.
(TheImmortalJenkins, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 15:51, 4 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

She must be, like, 18 by now though?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 15:53, Reply)

oh Roota
were you this suspicious before b3ta?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 15:54, Reply)

Name me one time when my suspicions have been wrong
Edmund twice and wbm twice.

(Although I'm only having a laugh with this one)
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 15:55, Reply)

I'm not calling your skills into question honest!

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 15:56, Reply)

Fuck off Chompy

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 15:57, Reply)

man, b3ta is mean today

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 15:58, Reply)

fucking hippy

(PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:01, Reply)

shut up Bert

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:01, Reply)

Shut up, bert.

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 15:56, Reply)

+looking

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 15:57, Reply)

Multiple that number by 3
and you'd be somewhere close...
(TheImmortalJenkins, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 15:56, Reply)

EW, OLD PEOPLE DON'T DO THE SEX ON EACH OTHER!

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 15:57, Reply)

Yes we do.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:01, Reply)

UP YOURS, GRANDDAD!

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:01, Reply)

I thought that's what you were complaining about?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:02, Reply)

Now listen here, you.
I cannot be expected to be consistent in my opinions, OK?
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:04, Reply)

Haha, fair enough

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:07, Reply)

Exactly.
Now, get a haircut you young hooligan, I know your Dad, etc.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:08, Reply)

It's amazing the angles you can get to when you use a zimmer frame.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:04, Reply)

+ a walking stick in each end

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:05, Reply)

an ex of mine my sister
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 15:53, Reply)

haha
maybe you will fit in well here after all. B3tan in 'not having sex' shocker.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 15:54, Reply)

"and in a darkened underpass
I thought Good God my chance has come at last
But then a strange fear gripped me
And I just couldn't ask..."
(TheImmortalJenkins, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 15:56, Reply)

oooh so close
quoting lyrics doesn't go down well, just ask Cave Duck about his initiation. Also quoting Morrissey will put you in Monty's black books, but everyone lives there so I wouldn't worry about that bit too much.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 15:57, Reply)

I'm not in there!
...I hope
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 15:58, Reply)

quoting Morrissey will put you in anyone's bad books
he's a terrible shitcunt
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 15:59, Reply)

There's something about him that makes me feel he can't be trusted.
Like, I wouldn't be surprised if he had a fridge full of meat. Or he has McDonald's when he's drunk.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:01, Reply)

he just looks fundamentally untrustworthy
slimy and shifty

in fact, he bears a striking resemblance to someone on here....
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:02, Reply)

he recently said something derogatory about the Chinese
so he's been deemed to be a bit racist.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:12, Reply)

He said they were a sub species of the human race
beecuz dey meen 2 da fwuffy bunniez.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:13, Reply)

I would like to eat a rabbit right in front of his face.

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:16, Reply)

Well he is an ignorant cunt too.
You can't have a subspecies of a race.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:16, Reply)

er.
do you not read half the stuff on here?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:17, Reply)

Often, but I read that through and took it mean that:
Morrisey had said that the chinese were a sub species of the human race.

I believe the chinese to be a race of the human species.

Where did I go wrong?
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:23, Reply)

noooo
you queried how there could be a sub-species of the human race.

i was implying that such a thing is alive and well and posting on here.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:25, Reply)

Sorry, I was just being pedantic as to the relationship between species and races.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:28, Reply)

LEAVE THE INTERNET.

RIGTH NOW.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:05, Reply)

<coat>
Look, I promise never to deface the site with Smiths lyrics ever again...
(TheImmortalJenkins, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:06, Reply)

You should try Bowie, Monty *loves* Bowie

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:07, Reply)

Actually try anybody.
It unlikely that Monty will be happy.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:12, Reply)

Rigth?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:07, Reply)

Are you so angry you're trembling like a flower?

(PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:09, Reply)

He trying out one of his products, and can't see through the gimp mask.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 16:11, Reply)

You should have said you were getting loads.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 15:59, Reply)