bastard gym
doesn't close until 8.30, i thought it was 6.30. i don't need to decide for about 5 mins.

i went to a spa hotel and then out drinking with all my old friends from school, there were about 15 girls of us. it's a long long time since we were all out just the girls and not a husband or a baby in sight, hence the utter utter carnage!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 18:42, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Bloody hell - Sounds messy
If you decide to gym it after that then you've more motivation than a lot of us.
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 18:49, Reply)

i did go yesterday
when the rest of the girls were slobbing in the spa. little did i realise that the bloody gym OVERLOOKED the spa. so they were treated to the sight of my arse larding around on the cross trainer whilst they were lolling in the jacuzzi!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 18:51, Reply)

Heh -
I'd say you've earned a bit of down time. I avoid such situations by going running at night - If my mates saw me during my run, I'd get the piss ripped for a while.
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:00, Reply)

i have decided
to go for a walk in my ass-toning trainers instead, problem solved.

i agree, friends and training do not mix.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:08, Reply)

Are Greggs open this time of night?
Sorry, I can't help myself. I'm like that woman who put that cat in a bin
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:15, Reply)

there is a certain physical resemblance, yes

( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:21, Reply)

I bring it on myself.
I'm sorry.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:23, Reply)

sorry?
show me the male specimen that knows the meaning of the word
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:24, Reply)

Well there is me.
I'm the most remorseful person I know.

(But I'm also the biggest twat I know as well, it it kinds evens out).
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:26, Reply)

yes but how do i know you are a man?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:27, Reply)

Would a woman call herself JeffTheDogFucker?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:28, Reply)

or rogerthestarfish?
with no pictoral evidence, my jury is out.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:32, Reply)

Ooooh. Harsh.
*Ponders how to prove himself as being all man without posting pictures of himself online*
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:34, Reply)

cockshot?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:35, Reply)

Sounds painful.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:37, Reply)

meh
good solution for a lot of your type!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:38, Reply)

If they were, I'd not be sat here
I'd be indulging in pastry based goodness
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:21, Reply)

my ex
once refused to go out for lunch with me because he wanted a pasty from greggs. we had a massive row and i stormed off. eventually he caught up with me and presented me with a cheese and onion pasty of my own as a peaceoffering. i was Unimpressed but a million times more so later on when i drove past it and realised they were "buy one get one free"...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:26, Reply)

hahahaha

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:26, Reply)

yes
now you see why i am so anti-men!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:28, Reply)

But yet pro-Greggs.
Your life must be one of constant angst.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:29, Reply)

i am not pro-greggs
i have about 3 sets of court proceedings against greggs on my to-do list!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:32, Reply)

Oh yeah, You mentioned that a while ago.
At least, regardless of how the court proceedings go, you have the knowledge that you once took a free pasty from them.

So you'll be a winner in my eyes.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:35, Reply)

nothing exciting
i do hope their pasties choke my ex one day though for that!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:36, Reply)

Hahaha
Pastry Fail! What a fucking tightwad - My wife'd pan me if I got her a pasty after a blue.

I must admit, the only time we ever go there is when we're up in the lake district and go there early doors to get a pack up for the day ... This said I'm a son of a bitch for their individual pizzas.

We have a Cooplands the next village over from work so may swing in tomorrow.
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:31, Reply)

tight does not cover the half of it!
cheese and onion ftw. go for it.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:33, Reply)

If I were even remotely into masochism
I'd get her one - Although, Sheffield A&E would be removing the first rectally inserted pasty.
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:38, Reply)

this is why you are married
and he is my ex.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:38, Reply)

Good point
Is this the infamous bed shitter?
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:42, Reply)

this one was, yeah
i do, however, have many many lame stories!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:49, Reply)

Maybe
A rectally inserted pasty could have saved the linen :D
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:54, Reply)

yes but
that would have meant carrying out the insertion in the first place.

to quote toy story... "my arms are too short"
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:58, Reply)

It's a new range for Gregg's
Pre-lubed pastys for self insertion.

Prevents 99% of all bed shitting incidents (Greggs does not accept liability for the 1% of incidents which result in infamy on teh internets)
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 20:27, Reply)

I saw this film with 15 girls who were friends from school once.
It was pretty good, didn't watch it 'till the end.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:37, Reply)

pervy gonz is pervy!

( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:39, Reply)

I don't know what I'd do with myself in that situation.
I'd be to worried that I'm not paying enough attention to one of them, or I might make a social faux-pas by spending to much time with one of them without focusing on the others. I suppose technicaly I have enough digits to accomidate, unless it's all changed like hola-hoops and you can't fit them on your digits any more, in which case I'm screwed.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:42, Reply)

dude
how widely can you spread your toes? what are you, half-man half-monster-munch???
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:50, Reply)

I feel I may have overstretched my toe amberdextory.
Not a day goes by when I don't pick up something with my toes though, a lighter off the end of the table or some socks off the floor.... it's so much effort bending over and all that.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 20:01, Reply)

like a monkey?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 20:05, Reply)