A piece of cat poo.
I was having a late night curry on the sofa; I thought it was a dropped raisin from a peshwari naan.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:50, 3 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

oh man!
that is proper minging. Surely that's not true?
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:56, Reply)

Sadly 'tis true
It was a little 'tugnut' that was stuck to her arse. Must have dropped off as she was begging for a samosa.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:59, Reply)

My cat missed the litter tray yesterday
not a problem as my kitchen floor is tiled and she seems to do very dry poos.

I didn't eat it.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:56, Reply)

oh god
she sounds like one of the old ladies at my grandma's home.

that was worse though. i've never seen my dad frozen before.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:58, Reply)

She has finally figured out how to sleep on my lap
She didn't want to get off me last night, I ended up watching "Dawn of the dead" until 12.30. I didn't have the heart to turf her off and go to bed.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:00, Reply)

that is seriously cute
both of you!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:02, Reply)

She does this thing where she pulls her paws up under her chin as she sleeps
I think she's milking the whole "I'm a cute icke puddy-tat, please don't put me back in the cattery, pweeeeease"
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:06, Reply)

you're completely smitten aren't you??

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:23, Reply)

Is a strikethrough on 'smitten' really that obvious?

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:29, Reply)

"you're completely aren't you?"
how does that work??
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:31, Reply)

Oh - on so many levels.
I think it leaves the final opinion to the reader as to what one 'thinks he is' after reading the kitten story with it's baby talk.
Also works from a Richard Hell 'Blank Generation'* standpoint if you just pause for effect at the right moment after 'completely' and before 'aren't' - this is similar in that it is again about about interpretation but is much more pleasing.
*2nd reference of the day.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:40, Reply)

Winnah!
I actually had to stop eating my yoghurt for a moment there.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:15, Reply)

Lucky the spices from the curry...
...had worked their magic on my tastebuds so the flavour was soon lost, but I do recall a light 'fishiness' before I vomited.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:28, Reply)