b3ta.com qotw
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Home » Question of the Week » Off Topic » Post 933481 | Search
This is a question Off Topic

Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
Pages: Latest, 837, 836, 835, 834, 833, ... 1

« Go Back | Popular

What's the worst thing you've put in your mouth?
Vampito, Chompy is an acceptable answer.

Alt Q: Paying for online news, stupid or the way forward?
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:14, 175 replies, latest was 15 years ago)
Worst thing:
Fucking cheese...it's mouldy milk FFS.

Alt Q: I thought the interwebs were free? :)
(I helped save b3ta! snee held his breath since, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:18, Reply)
The Times has started charging, and now the News of the World.
I used to read the Times and haven't settled on a new paper since. I am reluctant to pay though.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:19, Reply)
Well it costs the newspapers to write and report the news.
Why should they give it away free?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:19, Reply)
I'm not relucatant due to a moral issue.
mainly because I'm a cheap student bastard.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:20, Reply)
Well go and buy a paper then!

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:26, Reply)
Broadsheets are too hard to handle. I like it on the screen.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:28, Reply)
Well pay the subscription then!
You have choices here Bob.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:30, Reply)
The Times no longer comes
in proper broadsheet format most places. So no problem there
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:55, Reply)
I've moved to the telegraph.
Although I miss The Times
(I helped save b3ta! disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:27, Reply)
You're not supposed to fuck it, man!
What on earth is wrong with you?
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:19, Reply)
A 'paper' endorsing homeopathic remedies*
But no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't swallow it.


*New feature: Enhance your offencelols to your own customised level by inserting manifesto or sacred text of choice!
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:18, Reply)
Run it through the photocopier a few thousand times first

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:19, Reply)
Ha! Took me a minute
(Well, six minutes, it's going to be a slow day.) I like.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:26, Reply)
very good indeed

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:26, Reply)
Marmite. Ick.
Everything connected with that word is awful.

Especially people saying "I'm like Marmite! You either love me or hate me!"

No, evreyone fucking hates you, you massive gareth.
(Miraclefish How appropriate, you fight like a cow, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:20, Reply)
What they're basically saying is
"I resemble a funny-smelling brown sludge!"

I do like Marmite though.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:20, Reply)
i am very fussy about what i allow near my mouth
but sometimes we all make mistakes.

foodwise, gotta be the kidneys which i stole from a date's (untouched) plate thinking they were mushrooms. i was thinking "that'll teach him to go to the bathroom". in fact it taught me never to date a man who orders something as vile as meat topped with more meat.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:24, Reply)
Taking food from someone else's plate?
Urrugh.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:25, Reply)
^This
I thought you had breeding girl. Jesus H Christ.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:26, Reply)
well normally i do
and if he had started eating or had been within eyeshot of his plate, i would never have done it, sharing half-eaten food makes me yak. but an untouched mushroom theft seemed ok.

meh.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:27, Reply)
Probably the drainage
from a tooth abcess.

*bokes*
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:25, Reply)
I feel a bit sick now.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:27, Reply)
I threw up many times during this time
when it was draining
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:30, Reply)
YUCK

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:27, Reply)
Love you too

(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:30, Reply)
dear god
don't bring that with you when you come to play with my plumbing, will you?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:28, Reply)
I'm only bringing a drill
I'll make you sore when I get there.

*zing*
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:30, Reply)
Least sexy euphemism of the day.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:30, Reply)
sorry
it was continuing a theme from an earlier thread. i don't really think that plumbing is sexy.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:31, Reply)
I can't help but imagine that YOURS is,
but in general, not so much, no.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:33, Reply)
it's a victorian flat, so it creaks a bit these days
but it is still beautifully made and very well maintained
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:34, Reply)
There are so many strikethrough possibilities here that I am crippled with indecision.
Obviously I have no need to ask whether it's been regularly serviced.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:39, Reply)
ORLY?

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:40, Reply)
Your own
or someone else's?
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:28, Reply)
Mine
Thankfully.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:29, Reply)
oh man that's gross!
I vomited a pint or so of blood from when I had my tonsils out, that was unpleasant but it did taste a bit like steak.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:29, Reply)
I like the taste of blood
so irony.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:31, Reply)
Yuuuuuk
I hear ice cream is the nicest thing to throw up.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:31, Reply)
Yoghurt
almost completely PH neutral on the way up.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:32, Reply)
Ice cold milk.
As long as it bounces within about five minutes, there's no discernible difference.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:34, Reply)
A uni friend used to vomit a LOT
He said milk was most comfortable, lots of peanuts was most entertaining (they rattle, apparently).
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:36, Reply)
I'll keep that in mind for next time I visit Lampito

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:34, Reply)
next time we go for a Snog
I'll punch you really hard in the boob so you throw up, you can let me know what it's like!
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:43, Reply)
Deal
If you punch me in the left one, this is entirely possible.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:45, Reply)
it's my favourite thing to throw up

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:41, Reply)
haha I just noticed your sig.
yeah I heard icecream was nice because it was sort of soothing on the way back up.

Special K purple berries looks exactly the same on the way back up.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:42, Reply)
It made me laugh,
I'm going to carry out a survey to see if this is the general concensus. The mous thing, that is.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:43, Reply)
the only thing that springs to mind`
is taking a swig from a can of beer that has had ash flicked in it. That is pretty gross.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:26, Reply)
A guy we drank with years ago
One drank about half a dozen fag ends and ash, washed down with a mouthful of beer.

Awful.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:28, Reply)
that makes me urge
It's revolting.

just getting a strand of baccy from the roach of a spliff in my mouth is almost enough to make me shout soup.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:29, Reply)
eww
I don't get people who drink the bong water. If I spilled it and they were all "now you gotta down it haha" I know what my response would be.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:29, Reply)
I've never known anyone that retarded
I'd punch them to death
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:30, Reply)
This. I hate all the bravado that comes with any social situation where more than three men are present.
It's fucking bent.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:32, Reply)
same here
it's like stag do stuff. I just want to have a laugh with my mates, get caned, have a surf and not be subjected to some kind of ritual humilation.

If some of my mates think that it is a good idea to do it anyway then they really don't know me very well.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:35, Reply)
Why would anyone want to drink either bong-water
Or the contents of an ashtray?

It's beyond me.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:32, Reply)
I think off milk would have to be the winner.
If I can't tell if it's ok through sniffing it I'll pour a little bit in a glass, but a few weeks ago I was in a rush so I just swigged it straight out of the bottle. It was so off that when I poured it down the sink it had lumps in it. I did quite a few of those retchy stomach clency things, it was most unpleasant.

I wouldn't pay for online news when you can get it for free. BBC is free, Google news is free, Daily Mail is free
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:26, Reply)
My worst one still makes me heave.
My old dear had made sunday lunch and was dishing it up. The gravy was sat in the pan with a spoon next to it. I licked the spoon thinking it was gravy. My dad had just fed the cat.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:33, Reply)
was it really that bad?
I sometimes think that catfood doesn't really look or smell any worse than a Tesco Value steak and kidney pie.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:43, Reply)
Yeah, it's cold, grainy, tastes like mud, blood, and sand.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:45, Reply)
Acid
As in LSD. Never again.

Alt Q - Stupid until everyone starts doing it, the news is available through more than one online channel as far as I'm aware.

That said, if I couldn't get at the Guardian website to read Charlie Brooker and Grace Dent's columns I'd be miffed
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:28, Reply)
Ahh so that's why they're in the form of sugar cubes sometimes.

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:44, Reply)
It wasn't the taste
Ecstasy tastes much worse than Acid, that's fucking nasty. It was the next four hours that put me off ever putting it in my mouth again
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:55, Reply)
Next time, best to drop liquid acid into your tear ducts.
Within five minutes you will be playing xylophone on Mars.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:46, Reply)
An oyster.
My grandad bet me a pound I wouldn't eat it. Also, a full glass of freshly squeezed lemon juice, only replace "grandad" with "mother"

Worst non-food item - my ex's cock.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:29, Reply)
I fucking love oysters.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:31, Reply)
I hate them
But I'll do anything for money so...
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:33, Reply)
christ
that's brave, saying that on here!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:33, Reply)
Ah well
Everyone probably knows this already.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:35, Reply)
they've all rushed off to count their coppers

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:36, Reply)
They'll need more than coppers

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:41, Reply)
no 5p's either

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:43, Reply)
Notes only please.
Purple or orange
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:44, Reply)
It's good to know you accept monopoly money

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:45, Reply)
red surely??
i love having a red note in my wallet, makes me feel rich. but then noone ever wants to take it off me.

well, except the taxi driver that i gave one to in totally twatted state for an £18 fare and said "keep the change".

and he did :(
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:47, Reply)
flash dick x

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:53, Reply)
Are fifties not orange?

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:56, Reply)
no, tens are orange/brown
and fifties are red
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:56, Reply)
Shows how often I get my grubby mitts on a fifty.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:59, Reply)
father christmas used to bring them for me occasionally
they would pop out of the mini tree stocking.

i used to get v disappointed on the years he only brought chocolate coins.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:05, Reply)

purple orange
porffor oren
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:53, Reply)
oh hai!
What time is pole tonight, I forgot already. Also, is it easy to find or am I going to get got by the Fallowfield Ripper?
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:31, Reply)
Half eight at the Armatige centre
It's proper easy to find, but I'll meet you outside the main doors if you like?
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:33, Reply)
sweet thanks
I can give you a lift home if you want, so we don't get lolraped.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:45, Reply)
Ooh, nice, cheers.
See you laterzzz
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:46, Reply)
i've got to say
i couldn't eat an oyster for a quid. just wait til you next get a cold and swallow the phlegm, it's exactly the same.

shudder.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:32, Reply)
It's not!
Phlegm isn't as salty.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:33, Reply)
See above.
Will do practically anything for money.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:34, Reply)
Already with the retractions!
PRACTICALLY anything now, eh?
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:35, Reply)
Did I not put that in the first one?
I do have some limits, obviously
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:36, Reply)
Chompy's ringing the bank back to cancel that loan as we speak.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:37, Reply)
Get with the times
Chompy hasn't fancied me for aaaages
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:39, Reply)
Wait, is that even possible?
You ARE female, aren't you?
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:41, Reply)
Those were the days.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:41, Reply)
Aahhh, the nostalgia.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:41, Reply)
I remember when I was into nostalgia....

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:42, Reply)
Misty water coloured memories,

(PsychoChomp, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:46, Reply)
Watercoloured?
Paintings or it didn't happen.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:47, Reply)
It never did.
aw tear :(
(PsychoChomp, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:49, Reply)
I thought Chompy
wasn't picky.

You know, pulse first, then girl bits and it's all systems go?
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:42, Reply)
you could just cook them
it's not compulsory to eat them raw.

Although if you think oysters are bad, try fresh sea urchin.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:34, Reply)
i don't like anything sea-food-y
if i have to fight with it first, i don't want to eat it.

when we had our house in spain, i was forever putting my hand in my bag or pocket to find that my brother and his mates had stuffed them full of stray tentacles from some horrible clicky thing or another.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:36, Reply)
I'm afraid this spells the end of our relationship...

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:40, Reply)
what, because we sold the house when my mother died?
you shallow bastard!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:42, Reply)
mainly the seafood thing actually
mussels may look rather like unpleasant vaginas, but moules mariniere is still my favourite thing to eat.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:43, Reply)
Vaginas are good too.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:51, Reply)
er...
no!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:52, Reply)
I can find a good home for yours if you don't like it.

(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:53, Reply)
mine works just fine thank you!

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:56, Reply)
*looks forlornly at empty vagina display cabinet*

(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:57, Reply)
And they last longer -
Once you eat a mussel it's all gone and you can't put your willy in it.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:53, Reply)
Unlike a cow.
Tear off a steak and fuck it.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:57, Reply)
Exactly
You can tenderise the rump and sirloin as you jackhammer.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:00, Reply)
Slap that ass.
Woot! Woot!
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:11, Reply)
definitely
massive noms.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:54, Reply)
*high fives*

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:55, Reply)
Oh come on. Baby octopus
Pulpo a la Gallega. What's not love?

I want to go back to Galicia now.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:43, Reply)
i love spain
but they don't get vegetarians!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:48, Reply)
I was talking about sea urchin at lunchtime
I'd try most things, but I would draw the line there.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:36, Reply)
I find the spines get stuck in my throat

(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:37, Reply)
I'd love to try it
I'm desperately trying to get to somewhere that deep-fries spiders.

Weird food = good food.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:38, Reply)
I had it in Mauritius
it's .... well, the texture is unpleasant, but the taste is nothing-y. Closest thing I can give you is half-set jelly made with seawater and no flavourings.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:41, Reply)
a hockey stick at the peak of follow-through travelling at full speed.

Or Unicum.

It's a toss up, although it takes less time to recover from the Unicum.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:30, Reply)
On my first PE lesson at high school
I hit a girl straight in the forehead with a hockey stick. She said "Oh" and sat down. I wasn't very popular in high school.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:32, Reply)
I broke my hockey stick in half on some poor lad's shin once.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:36, Reply)
The emergency max fac surgeon trying to put my mouth back together
came out with the classic "ah, I can see the difference between fragments of jaw and fragments of stick as jawbone isn't usually blue"
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:40, Reply)
I played in defense in hockey, with two guys who played golf
I get the ball, pass it to them, they hoon it up the pitch. Or in one case, I pass the ball, it hits a divot and goes careening straight into the guys face.
Noses bleed a LOT.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:40, Reply)
We were banned after our defensive line perfected the collaborative scoop-and-volley approach.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:45, Reply)
Haha!
We were warned off trying to recreate the Guiness advert with the Irish hockey.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:47, Reply)
I played in goal in hockey (obviously as I almost filled it)
Game one of the season I broke a player from Milfields ankle after he went all spastic and charged me from a short corner. The tangle of legs and sticks snapped him like a twig.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:50, Reply)
As in Millfield School?
Good, he probably fucking deserved it.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:53, Reply)
Yeah, I went to Clifton we played them and a handful of others.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:54, Reply)
I've played hurling
it's fucking hard, but also great
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:50, Reply)
Me too, it's impossible not to get the shit kicked out of you.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:51, Reply)
I was playing with some colleagues so it was a bit tame in that respect

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:56, Reply)
I spent every summer holiday in Ireland. I learnt the tough way.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:58, Reply)
haha I used to play hurling as a kid
you've just got to be violent and you win`
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:00, Reply)
The way I remembered the rules were
as long as the paddle hits the ball anything is fair game.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:07, Reply)
you're a divot

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:54, Reply)
What were you doing sucking off a cartoon unicorn in the first place?

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:36, Reply)
Ah, come on.
You telling me you wouldn't give a unicorn a sly nosh?

it's a fairly disturbing Hungarian digestiv. I think it only works because by the time you've stabilised to the level where you are 75% sure you aren't going to vomit yourself inside out, you've forgotten all about any chance of indigestion.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:38, Reply)
Well...have you seen the epic 80's cartoon "Dungeons & Dragons"?
HUBBA HUBBA
DING DONG
WOOF WOOF
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:39, Reply)
i actually have the box set of that
it was a slightly drunken online purchase
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:41, Reply)
Same here
I watched the first episode, thought "this hasn't aged well", and now it collects dust.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:42, Reply)
i also have dogtanian
and the pink panther

i am not sure wtf i had been drinking that weekend, it was a real shock when they arrived.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:44, Reply)
Really?
I'm amazed they bothered to do a DVD release
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:45, Reply)
oh yes
it was quite a cult thing back in the day though, wasn't it - there's a whole host of fuss about why they never made the last episode.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:49, Reply)
I've just run to the website of golden dreams (AKA: Amazon.co.uk)
£7.99 for the box set. It also recommended Dogtanian.

I think certain things from my childhood should stay in my childhood.
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:54, Reply)
i have watched DD with my nephew
and actually found myself laughing a bit at some of the lines that were clearly slipped in for adults (nothing dodgy, just a bit sarky).

dogtanian i watched with a friend when we were insanely hungover one sunday. i think we got through three episodes, then it was time for "america's next top model".
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:55, Reply)
If I had kids I would buy all the Tom & Jerry and Tex Avery cartoon box sets
then I would have a valid excuse to watch back to back T&J
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:58, Reply)
it's pretty much like that on the cartoon network anyway
wacky races ftw
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:02, Reply)
I refuse to give sky any money
so I don't get CN
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:11, Reply)
mine is virgin
i also hate giving them money.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:23, Reply)
Cheese in a can

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:36, Reply)
curdled milk

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:48, Reply)
+from real living boobs.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:49, Reply)
oh christ
we're back on the titcheese
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:49, Reply)
It's ok it's not on someones plate so suck away

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:51, Reply)
yeah
because the PLATE was the gross part.

student!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:55, Reply)
Mature student please.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:57, Reply)
boke

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:58, Reply)
Duck Liver Pate
*boiks*
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:50, Reply)
A piece of cat poo.
I was having a late night curry on the sofa; I thought it was a dropped raisin from a peshwari naan.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:50, Reply)
oh man!
that is proper minging. Surely that's not true?
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:56, Reply)
Sadly 'tis true
It was a little 'tugnut' that was stuck to her arse. Must have dropped off as she was begging for a samosa.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:59, Reply)
My cat missed the litter tray yesterday
not a problem as my kitchen floor is tiled and she seems to do very dry poos.

I didn't eat it.
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:56, Reply)
oh god
she sounds like one of the old ladies at my grandma's home.

that was worse though. i've never seen my dad frozen before.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:58, Reply)
She has finally figured out how to sleep on my lap
She didn't want to get off me last night, I ended up watching "Dawn of the dead" until 12.30. I didn't have the heart to turf her off and go to bed.
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:00, Reply)
that is seriously cute
both of you!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:02, Reply)
She does this thing where she pulls her paws up under her chin as she sleeps
I think she's milking the whole "I'm a cute icke puddy-tat, please don't put me back in the cattery, pweeeeease"
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:06, Reply)
you're completely smitten aren't you??

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:23, Reply)
Is a strikethrough on 'smitten' really that obvious?

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:29, Reply)
"you're completely aren't you?"
how does that work??
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:31, Reply)
Oh - on so many levels.
I think it leaves the final opinion to the reader as to what one 'thinks he is' after reading the kitten story with it's baby talk.
Also works from a Richard Hell 'Blank Generation'* standpoint if you just pause for effect at the right moment after 'completely' and before 'aren't' - this is similar in that it is again about about interpretation but is much more pleasing.
*2nd reference of the day.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:40, Reply)
Winnah!
I actually had to stop eating my yoghurt for a moment there.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:15, Reply)
Lucky the spices from the curry...
...had worked their magic on my tastebuds so the flavour was soon lost, but I do recall a light 'fishiness' before I vomited.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:28, Reply)

« Go Back | Reply To This »

Pages: Latest, 837, 836, 835, 834, 833, ... 1