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This is a question Sacked II

I once had a "friend" (I hated his guts) who lost two jobs on the same day - he drunkenly crashed the taxi he was driving when he was supposed to be at his office job. How have you been sacked?

(I helped save b3ta! Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 29 May 2014, 13:33)
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I made some silly posts on the internet.
So someone grassed me up to my boss and I totally got sacked.
(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Thu 29 May 2014, 21:27, 22 replies)
If only it were true, then it would be an amazing winner story.
Sadly, I call Albert levels of lie.
(I helped save b3ta! d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Thu 29 May 2014, 21:49, closed)
I miss Fairholme.
The remaining crop of dreary shits aren't nearly as dreary and tragic.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 29 May 2014, 21:58, closed)
You can always friend him on Facebook.
His grizzled pubic potato face still grimaces to the world from that particular medium.
(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti., Thu 29 May 2014, 22:24, closed)
It is a bit sad that you know this

(bad_advice QOTW survivor from the first trollocost!, Fri 30 May 2014, 7:35, closed)
In all fairness, it's not like he's an internet scarlet pimpernel.

(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 30 May 2014, 8:33, closed)
they seek him here, they seek hi... oh there he is ... jesus look at the state of that

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 30 May 2014, 9:15, closed)
Haaaaahahahahaha

(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 30 May 2014, 9:38, closed)
Actually, I'm very active on OTHER areas of the internet, it ain't all about b3ta.
My imgur profile is storming, I have nearly a 1000 rep. So yeah, fuck you.

www.imgur.com/user/ringofyre
(Rob Fairholme Ha! Fuck off. It's MY name., Fri 30 May 2014, 11:08, closed)
Is 800 the same as nearly 1000 now?
*updates OkCupid profile with 25% higher salary, penis size etc*
(sarcastic fringehead feet of clay, buns of steel, head of lettuce, Fri 30 May 2014, 12:10, closed)
2.5 inches?! phwoar!

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 30 May 2014, 12:22, closed)
Nearly - if we're measuring from under the balls now...

(sarcastic fringehead feet of clay, buns of steel, head of lettuce, Fri 30 May 2014, 13:30, closed)
Is there any other way?

(andythepieman Is surfing the waves of indifference on, Fri 30 May 2014, 15:45, closed)
Yeah, girth.

(I helped save b3ta! d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Fri 30 May 2014, 16:12, closed)
how many times you can wrap it around your waist?

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 30 May 2014, 16:21, closed)
If I could wrap my already large penis round my waist then I think even an elephant would be proud of the result.
But I get your drift and yes I am saying I am fat. Although technically not obese.
(I helped save b3ta! d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Fri 30 May 2014, 16:43, closed)
an elephant cock is over six foot long
if your waist measurement is over six foot then I'm pretty certain you're obese
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 30 May 2014, 16:51, closed)
I think ducks win, though
or is it seahorses?
(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 30 May 2014, 17:46, closed)
I don't know what this competition is but I definitely want to play.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 30 May 2014, 19:40, closed)
Looks like barnacles triumph, with a 40:1 ratio

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Sat 31 May 2014, 13:45, closed)
In that case, not an elephant but I believe my waist was once about 60 inches. Now a mere 42 and shrinking.

(I helped save b3ta! d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Fri 30 May 2014, 18:42, closed)
you massive biffer

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 30 May 2014, 19:45, closed)
and

(I helped save b3ta! d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Sat 31 May 2014, 8:05, closed)

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