My girlfriend is getting second hand swole-shamed
My girlfriend told me today that on several different occasions her friends would say things to her like, "Don't you get tired of all those muscles?" and "Is he self absorbed and just lift weights all day?"
We both found this perplexing. Once the swole has come upon you it only takes about an hour a day to maintain, my gym time is actually a pretty quick and doesn't interfere with our relationship at all.
And as for the getting tired of all the muscles talk...well I told her to ask them if their boyfriend's flabby, weak bodies were a constant turn on.
People.
( $$ ✅, Fri 7 Aug 2015, 10:07, 38 replies)

"Don't you get bored with all that make up?"
"Nah. She only spends an hour or so a day putting it on."
(Go Man River everybody loves anal, Fri 7 Aug 2015, 10:21, closed)

At least you're not emabarrassed to talk about it.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 7 Aug 2015, 10:23, closed)

I'm trying to figure out what this is...
...it's almost internet hardmanning, but not quite...
...and there's a whiff of passive aggression about it, but that's not what it is.
(eViLegion Chief Commissioner of the Scottish Lunacy Board, Fri 7 Aug 2015, 10:46, closed)

I think his girlfriend is shagging around or something?

(Go Man River everybody loves anal, Fri 7 Aug 2015, 11:23, closed)

What, is she French?

( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 7 Aug 2015, 14:50, closed)

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 7 Aug 2015, 14:55, closed)

as a girl, and a girl who has dated someone with an obsession about his muscles,
I can tell you that what her friends are really asking is this:

IS IT TRUE THAT A GUY WITH MASSIVE MUSCLES HAS A TINY COCK?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 7 Aug 2015, 11:23, closed)

They do indeed, at least if they are on the juice
So I'm told.
(the other guy not the one that gave you coochie warts, Mon 10 Aug 2015, 3:55, closed)

Muscle building does seem to make their cocks smaller. If they take it to extremes, that is.

(Porcupine, Mon 10 Aug 2015, 9:06, closed)

And why do they always go out with fat chicks?

(Go Man River everybody loves anal, Mon 10 Aug 2015, 9:32, closed)

because they won't stoop to stringy haired french ones?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Aug 2015, 11:00, closed)

upset fat spinster obsessed with my wife and kids will probably flounce when I log in as her and post about fatty club

(Go Man River everybody loves anal, Mon 10 Aug 2015, 11:42, closed)

^ creepy as fuck ^

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Aug 2015, 11:44, closed)

I'm not the one stalking a stranger's wife and kids online, porkchop

(Go Man River everybody loves anal, Mon 10 Aug 2015, 11:46, closed)

right, but you commenting on my appearance isn't "stalking a stranger online", how, exactly?
you really are a bizarre little beardy weirdy, aren't you?

your wife married you. therefore she has to be a minger. because nobody else would have had you. that is the extent of my reasoning on the subject. I couldn't care less whether it's accurate or not.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Aug 2015, 11:50, closed)

It's hardly my fault that you fucked somebody so ineptly that they called you fat online.

(Go Man River everybody loves anal, Mon 10 Aug 2015, 11:55, closed)

well, if it's online, it must be true, and ignore the ones who know me well IRL, eh?
and your reference to a "gonk nose" was taken from where, exactly? the creepy dictionary of creepiness?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Aug 2015, 12:00, closed)

no ... that was from your gonked in photo

(Go Man River everybody loves anal, Mon 10 Aug 2015, 12:57, closed)

I mean linked gonk

(Go Man River everybody loves anal, Mon 10 Aug 2015, 12:57, closed)

I mean fat club

(Go Man River everybody loves anal, Mon 10 Aug 2015, 12:57, closed)

You awful bully. Now you're going to have to wait until they close the question and edit the bloobloodelete back in.

(yoyo river, Mon 10 Aug 2015, 16:54, closed)

What's a swole?
Short for "sweaty arsehole?"
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 7 Aug 2015, 11:43, closed)

shit was so cash

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 7 Aug 2015, 13:37, closed)

yo

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 7 Aug 2015, 21:15, closed)

this is great stuff
wordsontheinternet.org/2014/04/09/swole-shamed-by-the-police-trigger-warning/
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 7 Aug 2015, 22:45, closed)

muscles are for manual workers and insecure wristers

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 7 Aug 2015, 19:02, closed)

I don't really understand what this is about,
but I wish your girlfriend a swift recovery from whatever it is that ails her.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 7 Aug 2015, 21:56, closed)

I have no idea
I stole it from Reddit
( $$ ✅, Sat 8 Aug 2015, 8:22, closed)

stole, whatever
you posted it on there first
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Sat 8 Aug 2015, 10:41, closed)

alright purple aki

( rofl harris, Sat 8 Aug 2015, 10:39, closed)

Live on a different continent now
Yet still get the fear when someone mentions Aki!
(yeswehavenopasties, Mon 10 Aug 2015, 0:40, closed)

In the early 80s as a Merseyside kid, I lived in mortal fear of Aki

(Porcupine, Mon 10 Aug 2015, 9:05, closed)

Fuck an A

( $$ ✅, Mon 10 Aug 2015, 13:55, closed)