ASDA packaging development proof read your items before giving the ok for production
smoky bbq pizza? maybe should have been smokey?

groceries.asda.com/asda-estore/catalog/sectionpagecontainer.jsp?departmentid=1214921923736
go to the pizza section and you will see it there
( fluffybunnykiller Is feasting on the clitoris of life, Fri 5 Aug 2011, 23:13, Reply)

BTCC webmasters please check your spelling before publishing
www.btcc.net/html/generalnews_detail.php?id=2531

sundea not sunday
must be bad if even i noticed it
( fluffybunnykiller Is feasting on the clitoris of life, Fri 5 Aug 2011, 23:12, 1 reply, 13 years ago)

(Angus the Anus, Fri 5 Aug 2011, 22:50, Reply)

puffins next time try salbutomol inhalers

( fluffybunnykiller Is feasting on the clitoris of life, Fri 5 Aug 2011, 20:47, Reply)

Next time you get home from the supermarket...
keep the carrier bags and don't fold the receipt, then upon your next visit simply pick up all the same items, put them in the bags while instore and then walk out without paying. If you get stopped you can show them your receipt.
(bunglist, Fri 5 Aug 2011, 13:57, 2 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

Annoy annoying people who use the phrase "OMG!"
by replying that they are your favourite band too and ask them whether they preferred 'Enola Gay' or 'Joan of Arc'...
(SonoraAeroClub "OH SWEET HELEN OF BALLS!", Fri 5 Aug 2011, 13:53, Reply)

Flocculate your colloidals
by agglomeration, using Moringa oleifera as described in Smoluchowski kinetics.
( Rotating Wobbly Hat That's not a banana. THIS is a banana., Fri 5 Aug 2011, 13:53, Reply)

Next time you're at the supermarket...
take more carrier bags than you need, once home you can use them to store all the carrier bags you probably have lying around.
(bunglist, Fri 5 Aug 2011, 13:51, 2 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

Make your neighbours think you're a naturist
by gardening in the nude.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 5 Aug 2011, 11:15, 1 reply, 13 years ago)

Make your neighbours think you are a naturist
by taking only a small case of toiletries with you as you leave the house to embark on a two-week holiday...
(SonoraAeroClub "OH SWEET HELEN OF BALLS!", Fri 5 Aug 2011, 11:10, Reply)

Never
Eat brown flakes off any surface, no matter how sure you are that it's chocolate.
Learned this the hard way, but I keep forgetting...
(spidaminida, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 23:24, Reply)

News Websites!
When reporting on the story of Madeleine Pulver, the Sydney teenager at the centre of the 'bomb collar' extortion case, ensure you crop your accompanying photo correctly, i.e. like this.

Nobody's going to read this rubbish.
(costas, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 21:15, 2 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

Stay safe in the wilderness.
Buy a suit from Troy Hurtubise.
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 18:34, Reply)

Don't lap urine off the street.

(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 18:29, Reply)

Don't eat yellow snow

(retrac fumble in the jungle, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 17:25, 3 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

McDonalds! Increase your presence in the public conciousness by foraying into politics
Whoever of Boris Johnson or Ken Livingston loses the next london election, offer them the consolation position of Mayor McCheese.
( Rotating Wobbly Hat That's not a banana. THIS is a banana., Thu 4 Aug 2011, 11:36, 2 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

avoid the Stalinist purges

( Rotating Wobbly Hat That's not a banana. THIS is a banana., Thu 4 Aug 2011, 10:54, 1 reply, 13 years ago)

are you an assasin? are you bored with hudrum head shots and back stabbing?
want a change? then simply invite your next contract to a relaxing weekend at dignitas in lovely relaxing Switzerland and let them enjoy the clean swiss air till its there turn for the quit room
( fluffybunnykiller Is feasting on the clitoris of life, Wed 3 Aug 2011, 20:56, Reply)

A tea strainer
makes an ideal fencing mask for your scrotum.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Wed 3 Aug 2011, 19:48, 5 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

Putting tyres on a bicycle
I ride a road bike and it was a struggle putting tyres onto the rim, thinking about how i could lubricate the tyre to reduce the friction from stopping it pop onto the rim, led me to think, what everyday object i could use. What i found was that using a plastic shopping bag worked like a charm, it stops the tyre from sticking to the rim and is easily inched onto the rims without having to push for dear life.

tl:dr - Use a plastic carrier bag to put bicycle tyres back onto the rim.
( schizophrenic_sheep, Wed 3 Aug 2011, 19:37, 2 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

Avoid hurting yourself due to your spatial awareness problems by going everywhere dressed in a full suit of C17th armour.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 3 Aug 2011, 15:19, Reply)

Prepare yourself for any situation where 'shit' may 'go down'
by listening to Cypress Hill...
(SonoraAeroClub "OH SWEET HELEN OF BALLS!", Wed 3 Aug 2011, 14:03, 3 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

Feeling depressed?
Simply pretend everything's OK.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 3 Aug 2011, 12:59, Reply)

Not enough Blu-Tack to put up that poster?
Simply cut off one of the corners...
(SonoraAeroClub "OH SWEET HELEN OF BALLS!", Wed 3 Aug 2011, 12:58, 3 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

Create your own minature shop front using the used holding card from a new SIM.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 3 Aug 2011, 12:11, 1 reply, 13 years ago)

Bite nips with a dowl.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 3 Aug 2011, 11:57, Reply)

Shite pips on her jowls.

(oneinthepink is at your cervix m'lady, Wed 3 Aug 2011, 11:49, Reply)

Pipe shit up with your bowels
or something
(Smale is stuffed, Wed 3 Aug 2011, 10:54, Reply)

Light shit up with a Lowel

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 3 Aug 2011, 10:46, Reply)