my girlfriend just text me.
She's sitting next to Dylan Moran on the tube.

I told her to touch his winkie.

MORE NEWS AS FOLLOWS.
(Quatermass and teh Shit, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:33, archived)

*yawn*

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:34, archived)

How did she text you from the tube?

( Malchick, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:35, archived)

with a mobile phone.

(Quatermass and teh Shit, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:36, archived)

There's no coverage
in the tube, you twat, it's underground.
( sprinkles ITS AN ISLAND, morron, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:38, archived)

Sometimes the tube goes overground a bit so you can use mobile phones.

It's special.
( Fictional Emma, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:40, archived)

See: East Finchley onwards northbound on the northern line.
Also: Lots of bits of district line.
( rosie posie tingly bongly, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:47, archived)

Also: about half the length of the Central and H+C lines.
Plus parts of the Circle line, Piccadilly line and East London line.
In fact, pretty much the only one that's entirely underground is the Waterloo and City...

edit: and almost all the Jubilee line north of Baker St and east of Canning Town
( Gizmo.mp3 does not exist, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:50, archived)

and there's a spot
at mile end where you think you're underground but you can still use your phone

double-special
( Clairebare Back once again with the Ill behaviour, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:49, archived)

Ah, that's because there's actually a small slot up to daylight.
If you stand on the westbound Central platform and look up you can see.

I only realised because I managed to get rained on there once
( Gizmo.mp3 does not exist, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:52, archived)

That was just a tramp pissing on your wafro

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:56, archived)

i know
and you missed most of the east and west ends of the District line
( Clairebare Back once again with the Ill behaviour, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 13:00, archived)

Rosie had already mentioned those.
What I entirely missed out was the huge stretch of Metropolitan line out to Amersham/Watford that's entirely open...
( Gizmo.mp3 does not exist, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 13:20, archived)

MY GOD YOU'RE GOOD.

( sprinkles ITS AN ISLAND, morron, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:36, archived)

oh get with it
what you mean is :
how did Parrot post this from the tube?
( Ralph farts in your general direction, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:36, archived)

You're forgetting one basic thing.
His girlfriend isn't actually real.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:37, archived)

do you think it's just his dog
in a dress and hat, sitting a the dinner table? He puts on a high-pitched, wooffling voice to make it talk:

"I ruff yoo, Parrott!"
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:41, archived)

*falls off chair laughing*

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:42, archived)

zoinks!
New best post of the day nomination?
( moohalaa, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:43, archived)

If this was /board..
..and spangolin was Dave The Hat there would be a million posts of 'W/Y/H' and slightly sexist 'Wooyay' anaimations.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:44, archived)

*cheesy grin*
I'd like to thank my mum, dad....
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:49, archived)

?
I don't do /main, so the references are lost on me... I like the strangeness on here instead.

I keep looking back, reading it, and seeing a dalmatian in a pink tutu with a voice not unlike Scooby Doo.
( moohalaa, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:50, archived)

i imagined a greyhound
in a spotty dress and sunhat. Also it did still sound like Scooby Doo.
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:56, archived)

haha
still made me piss myself laughing when I read it.
( moohalaa, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 13:07, archived)

I'VE GOT A GIRLFRIEND ME AND SHE'S SITTING NEXT TO A CELEBRITY
HONEST
( ArthurTheRat, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:35, archived)

I still love you.

( Malchick, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:38, archived)

Let's have disappointing adolescent sex.

( ArthurTheRat, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:39, archived)

i'd touch his winkie if she doesnt want to

and is she sure it's not just a drunk irishman?
( TopUpTheTea you ain't seen me, right?, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:36, archived)

pfft
if there's a story on the news later saying "drunk Irishman murders pouting topless man on tube train" then we'll know that he's tried........
( Ralph farts in your general direction, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:38, archived)

I hate your girlfriend.
/jealous like a big jealous thing
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:37, archived)

No point being jealous
of something that doesn't exist.
( sprinkles ITS AN ISLAND, morron, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:40, archived)

(Quatermass and teh Shit, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:50, archived)

Because she's sitting next to Dylan Moran,
or because she's Parrott's girlfriend?
( Newington, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:46, archived)

It would be wrong to hate her for being Parrott's missus.
She's got being Parrott's missus and being not real to cope with already.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:48, archived)

Oh, right,
are we supposed to give a fuck then?
( Bud Muhnquai Update your profile or fuck off, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:56, archived)

that
is fantastic.
(Half of Stephen Fry's right buttock pissed on your dog on, Fri 1 Sep 2006, 12:57, archived)