I'm really hungry
but I'm scared that if I go and get some food now, I'll miss something exciting happening on the internet.

Just to put my mind at ease, what are the chances of something exciting happening on the internet in the next, oh, say 10 years?

What was the last exciting thing that happened to you? Was it life-affirming? Or did it leave you with horrible, painful open wounds?
( The Neville What what what, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 10:53, archived)

My mum made some blackberry pies
and put them in the freezer so we can have blackberry pies at a later date.
( Comma, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 10:54, archived)

This is a good way to plan for the future
I wish I had pies in my freezer. But alas, I do not. I only have meat and chips.
( The Neville What what what, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 10:55, archived)

You could make a meat pie with a fried potato crust.

( Comma, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 10:56, archived)

Nah, bollocks to that
I shall instead fashion some form of ice sculpture out of frozen meat and sell it to the Tate Modern for profit
( The Neville What what what, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 10:56, archived)

Our poetry is second to none.

( Druid, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 10:57, archived)

Your brow is scary to nuns.

( Comma, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 11:00, archived)

100% fact.

( Druid, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 11:04, archived)

I did a poop that was very meaty, and it almost smelt nice and made me hungry again.

I then realised I wasn't anywhere near a toilet when this happened.
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 10:54, archived)

I'd go and eat too...
but my FUCKING JAW FUCKING HURTS TOO FUCKING MUCH TO OPEN MY FUCKING MOUTH WIDE ENOUGH TO GET SOME FUCKING FOOD IN THE FUCKING THING
( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 10:54, archived)

I'M SORRY I HURT YOU LAST NIGHT BUT I DID WARN YOU ON THE EMAILS ON FLING.COM

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 10:57, archived)

Most people lie :(

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 11:03, archived)

You'll miss the newest hilarious meme
its called 'SHOES ON HEAD'
( WormuIus, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 10:54, archived)

like this?
www.b3ta.cr3ation.co.uk/data/jpg/shoeonhead.jpg
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 11:02, archived)

10 years
is a vere long lunchbreak..
( Azra3l Lubrication Persuasion and Brute Force ™, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 10:54, archived)

My lunch is very long
in length terms. Roughly 15 miles
( The Neville What what what, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 10:57, archived)

blimey
after the first 3 miles most people would be too fat to move.

or is it only 1 inch wide?
( Azra3l Lubrication Persuasion and Brute Force ™, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 10:59, archived)

It's the width of 10 human hairs
So it is filling, but not in a greedy way
( The Neville What what what, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 11:00, archived)

If that is pubic hair width, then if it
is anything like my ex wife, I can only assume you are eating rope.
( Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Wed 27 Aug 2008, 11:06, archived)

It's spaghetti.

( Lord Gnome, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 11:00, archived)

Meeting my friend's baby boy
I know that's not technically exciting but it was for me. It was very life-affirming, and left me all gleeful and happy.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 10:54, archived)

That sort of thing
is always pleasant. Small people make happy coo-ing noises
( The Neville What what what, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 10:56, archived)

Past 10 years?
Ummmm. I asked FF to marry me. That was quite exciting, I guess.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 10:55, archived)

Hurrahs for excitamarriagings!

( The Neville What what what, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 10:55, archived)

Yes!
Hurrah indeed!
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 11:03, archived)

I didn't know that.
Hurrah for this sort of thing.
( Newington, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 10:59, archived)

Aww shucks.
Thanks
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 11:02, archived)

Baaaaaaaaabies

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 11:02, archived)

Not for a whiiillllllllllllllllleeeeeeeeeeeeeee

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 11:03, archived)

Did he look excited when you went down on your knees, only to be disappointed 5 seconds afterwards?
;D
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 11:04, archived)

I stabbed my finger with a screwdriver
when I was installing cat5 cables earlier on.
( moohalaa, Wed 27 Aug 2008, 10:55, archived)

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( Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Wed 27 Aug 2008, 11:00, archived)