Let her mum touch my massive errection when giving me tea whilst I was naked after fucking her daughter

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 19 May 2009, 17:57, archived)

Your dick is so small and warty
that it looks like a yoda pez dispenser
( WormuIus, Tue 19 May 2009, 17:58, archived)

Your dick is like ET's finger
it glows red when you're about to come
but only if a young boy is touching it.

When you jizz up his bum you murmer 'ouch'
( WormuIus, Tue 19 May 2009, 17:59, archived)

Your dick is so grey and twig like that midget witches fight over it as it would make a great wand for controlling spastics hungry for salt

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 19 May 2009, 18:02, archived)

When you were born you came out Downs
but your misguided gypsy parents hacked off all the lumpy bits and shaved your massive tongue.
( WormuIus, Tue 19 May 2009, 18:04, archived)

just because he is the love child of dave lee travis and suzi quatro
doesnt make him a bad person
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Tue 19 May 2009, 18:06, archived)

You're so spasticated that you were hatched from an egg laid by a cushings, it took you 12 years to break out, using your giant, pencil-like chin as a shell breaking beak.
You still hold the world record for gobbling your 'yolk of retardation' the fastest.
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 19 May 2009, 18:07, archived)

Instead of birthing fluid, your mother's womb was filled with vinegar
so that when you came out you looked like a pickled egg with hair.
Your flesh was white and rubbery and you smelled of sick.
( WormuIus, Tue 19 May 2009, 18:10, archived)

At birth you were donated to the National Rugby Association to help Johnny Wilkinson perfect his drop goals because your eyebrow clapping face made him doubt humanity so much
that he'd punt your shirehorse's hoof of a head with all his might to try and kick the retardation out of you. He'd get angry at you because you'd grip the grass with your teeth that jutted out like a builder's tool belt full of spanners.
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 19 May 2009, 18:16, archived)

Doctors were baffled at why you didn't grow properly
until they examined you and found to their horror that your bones were made from yoghurt coated twiglets.
( WormuIus, Tue 19 May 2009, 18:18, archived)

Every single one of your bodies organs has got a tiny mutant hand attached, the wrist is at 90 degrees to show how homosexual your body is.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 19 May 2009, 18:24, archived)

instead of cells
your body has pringlecrumbs
( WormuIus, Tue 19 May 2009, 18:25, archived)

Your mum used to let you lick cake mix from the bowl.
And when I say 'bowl' I mean your Down's haircut, and you'd do it in one lick you freakish, wide tongued chin holder.
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 19 May 2009, 18:26, archived)

I love you both so much for this thread

( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 19 May 2009, 18:29, archived)

We try :)

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 19 May 2009, 18:30, archived)

Your cock is so useless that when you get an 'errection' it flops out like a chameleon's tongue and will only attracked the shittest of insects due to its stickyness and smell of forna

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 19 May 2009, 18:04, archived)

You line your anal tract with sandpaper to rub away the protective sheaths of your bumlovers
so that you can get even more AIDS.
( WormuIus, Tue 19 May 2009, 18:05, archived)

Are all these things true?
/disappointed
( thealternativefact, Tue 19 May 2009, 18:09, archived)

Your arse is so baggy from being elbowed to your liver that it looks like a bare knuckle boxers' fist after fighting 20 rounds with a skip lorry

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 19 May 2009, 18:09, archived)

you practice inserting such large objects up your man-fanny that your ring is so well developed that it looks like a Krispy Kreme
made of salami
( WormuIus, Tue 19 May 2009, 18:15, archived)

so wrong but made me laugh

( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Tue 19 May 2009, 18:18, archived)

The reason why Opera was invented was so people could make a noise that described your freakish, gnulled conker of a cock to the masses.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 19 May 2009, 18:22, archived)

You are so spasticated that you sleep in the shape of a swatstika

( WormuIus, Tue 19 May 2009, 18:25, archived)

Haha!
I love you dude :)
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 19 May 2009, 18:26, archived)