Hello Internet.
You know me. I love it when you all fall out with each other, with your big fat woe. The way your past real life issues that you discussed online are brought up and talked about freely by people either built like warehouses or by cyber tough men built like 11 year old girls.
Can we have a bit more of that, please? I could then really begin to market you people. There's cash to be made.

We haven't had a real stroppy tantrum in quite some time. At least a proper one with tears and divisions in the THE INTERNET INCREDIBLY SERIOUS CLUB.
Just for one. Deliver on this request. I deserve your actions, I better you people.



Yours etc,
JMG. Popular Internet Leader.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sun 31 May 2009, 20:45, archived)

Vote JMG.

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sun 31 May 2009, 20:45, archived)

*cross in box*

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Sun 31 May 2009, 20:46, archived)

*cross at JMG*

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Sun 31 May 2009, 20:47, archived)

Haha!
YES!
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sun 31 May 2009, 20:47, archived)

I might do some mariokart in a minute.
In other news, I am considering adapting MongyChops' Dull Thread Bingo for Facebook or Twitter.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Sun 31 May 2009, 20:49, archived)

mariokart?
what about milkkart?
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:07, archived)

What about Milky Bars?

( Derpasaurus DOG FARTS, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:15, archived)

They're on me

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:24, archived)

i don't do face book so go for it
but there will be more b3ta bingo, it was a succes, even if i can't give a prize away to the winner, not my fault i think people may not want me to know their address, or not, next time, great prizes
( mongychops, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:53, archived)

Pfft

( Derpasaurus DOG FARTS, Sun 31 May 2009, 20:49, archived)

I am drinking Pepsi Max, JMG
With ICE.
( Derpasaurus DOG FARTS, Sun 31 May 2009, 20:46, archived)

I have a mini-bar in the room I'm currently situated.
There's 35 cans in the baby fridge.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sun 31 May 2009, 20:48, archived)

Swap them all with bricks
Down the lot.
( Derpasaurus DOG FARTS, Sun 31 May 2009, 20:56, archived)

a special fridge for keeping babies in?
why didn't I think of that?
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:01, archived)

maybe b3ta has reached it middle aged years
and can't really be arsed with the bickering anymore.
( jenpots, Sun 31 May 2009, 20:48, archived)

Let's all turn our dressing gowns inside out
And pretend we're wearing smoking jackets.
( Derpasaurus DOG FARTS, Sun 31 May 2009, 20:49, archived)

You dont have a smoking jacket?

( Cleisthenes morning sickness is a bitch, Sun 31 May 2009, 20:50, archived)

I prefer to wear a silk cape instead
Then I stand on the garden funiture during a high wind, looking windswept and triumphant.
( Derpasaurus DOG FARTS, Sun 31 May 2009, 20:57, archived)

Its good being 30+
You finally loose that need to pick on little details and reach a much happier place with yourself.

/very satisfied midlifer.
( Cleisthenes morning sickness is a bitch, Sun 31 May 2009, 20:49, archived)

yes
I'm 31. I find I really can't be arsed with bickers anymore.
( jenpots, Sun 31 May 2009, 20:56, archived)

b kn
( Derpasaurus DOG FARTS, Sun 31 May 2009, 20:57, archived)

them too

( jenpots, Sun 31 May 2009, 20:58, archived)

You might not be arsed with bickers
But what about biccies?
( Anthropos Was making beer on, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:00, archived)

always room for biccies

( jenpots, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:12, archived)

Crunch Creams FTW

( Anthropos Was making beer on, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:18, archived)

Chocolate hobnobs
are my favourites. Those or jaffa cakes.
( The Cat's Mother Not a People Person., Sun 31 May 2009, 21:45, archived)

THIS FUCKING THIS

( Derpasaurus DOG FARTS, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:54, archived)

Chocolate hob nobs are great
but are jaffa ckaes really biscuits?
( Anthropos Was making beer on, Sun 31 May 2009, 22:03, archived)

Don't start that again.
I believe it's a VAT dodge.
( The Cat's Mother Not a People Person., Sun 31 May 2009, 22:08, archived)

I'm enjoying a Sunday evening Corona
What beverage is our lord and master enjoying?
( SuperMatt, Sun 31 May 2009, 20:52, archived)

I don't do much alcohol at home.
But if I'm out and about I'm not against a JD and coke with ice.
I also prefer my football beer bottled.

Another insight.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sun 31 May 2009, 20:55, archived)

As you provide more and more of these insights
the internet may try to mimic your life as a way to become more popular.
Do you think this will work?
( SuperMatt, Sun 31 May 2009, 20:56, archived)

I can already imagine 90nz0's shaving his forehead.

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sun 31 May 2009, 20:58, archived)

Lies!
He'll never be rid of his Jewfro.
( SuperMatt, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:00, archived)

The fat tears stopped when you went gay, Jammers
you don't threaten the masculinity of the board any more
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sun 31 May 2009, 20:53, archived)

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
etc.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sun 31 May 2009, 20:58, archived)

JMG, yes, hello

( __, Sun 31 May 2009, 20:54, archived)

Friz etc!

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sun 31 May 2009, 20:59, archived)

Who would you be marketing us to?

( Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Sun 31 May 2009, 20:56, archived)

SCIENCE

( Derpasaurus DOG FARTS, Sun 31 May 2009, 20:58, archived)

*scares*

( Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:00, archived)

*probes*
NOTE: SUBJECT APPEARS TO HAVE THREE MINGES.
( Derpasaurus DOG FARTS, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:16, archived)

This is a valid question.
What WOULD Pickle Fairy's target demographic be?
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Sun 31 May 2009, 20:58, archived)

the same as Lurpak's, probably

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sun 31 May 2009, 20:59, archived)

Could you not have chosen a nice fatty food?

( Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:01, archived)

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Sun 31 May 2009, 21:07, archived)

What?
I'd like to be marketed to people like donuts or something, not lurpak.
( Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:08, archived)

people like donuts

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:10, archived)

Jammy could be marketed to people like donuts.

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:10, archived)

Please tell me your political beliefs!
PLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEE
( Willwillwritehiswill An arse like a slapped face., Sun 31 May 2009, 21:02, archived)

Think 'Animal Farm'
Except JMG is one of the pigs and the sheep are sat at computers, bleating about World of Whalecraft.
( Derpasaurus DOG FARTS, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:14, archived)

4 orcs good, 2 orcs bad.

( Willwillwritehiswill An arse like a slapped face., Sun 31 May 2009, 21:22, archived)

That's a Level 75 response, right there
*other fat terminology*
( Derpasaurus DOG FARTS, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:24, archived)

LIGHTNING BOLT! LIGHTNING BOLT! LIGHTNING BOLT!
edit: it's STILL hilariously sad
( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:34, archived)

Fucking hell
I know at least one person who does this as well.
( Derpasaurus DOG FARTS, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:54, archived)

JMG, I had an odd dream last night.
In which I fell out with you here, and as a consequence everyone on /talk blocked me. Every time I looked at it there was just a blank screen.

Would you care to give some sort of Freudian analysis?
( Anthropos Was making beer on, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:20, archived)

I had a dream I ate a 10 pound marshmallow.
I woke up in a pool of my own vomit.
( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:24, archived)

When you woke up
Was your pillow there?
( Anthropos Was making beer on, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:29, archived)

I got bored of that last thread quite quickly
I say bored, I was actually distracted by a guitar synth plugged into Cubase with half the strings triggering a Moog Modular and the rest triggering ARP2600s and MiniMoogs.

Then my CPU overheated and the machine rebooted. And I had to change my underwear.
( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:26, archived)

Guitar synth and strings plugged into cubase sounds sexy.

( Anthropos Was making beer on, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:28, archived)

yes, until your machine locks up and the soundcard spazzes out and just goes SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE at full volume

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:30, archived)

Yeh, annoying.
You running some sort of external soundcard?
( Anthropos Was making beer on, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:38, archived)

it's a PCI one, Terratec DMX-something

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:41, archived)

Gotcha,
I bought an external jobby with phantom power for my mics, midi and all that jazz. Pretty good really, still can't get it to sound professional mind.

Hoping to go to a proper studio over the summer and record.
( Anthropos Was making beer on, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:43, archived)

I've got a vague plan to do live shows with the guitar synth
so I might just get a laptop and a USB sound module

then wait for it to crash and go SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE through a P.A.
( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:46, archived)

get yourself a massive heatsink

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:47, archived)

I've got one
but I didn't want to fit it, it sounds like a jet engine

what's good for silent-ish cooling?
( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:49, archived)

buckets of water

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:52, archived)

Just throw the water on, make sure the mains is on too.
It makes the cooling work better.

Don't know about cooling i'm afraid, my pc has a fecking massive noisy fan in it which makes it sound like a hoover when it is doing stuff.
( Anthropos Was making beer on, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:55, archived)

I've got a Scythe Ninja 2 in this machine,
you can run it without a fan on it if your CPU is relatively low power. I've also fitted an OCZ Vendetta II before, that's quite good. I'm just about to take delivery of an Akasa AK 920-2, which is getting good reviews despite being fairly cheap, so I'll let you know how that turns out.

What processor have you got?
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:53, archived)

Core Duo something or other, dunno, it's written on the box
I really need SILENT cooling for it for home recording purposes
( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:55, archived)

A Scythe Ninja ought to be able to cope with a Core 2 Duo,
you can usually set the BIOS up to run the fan at variable speed as well. I'm assuming the PC case has fans in it as well?
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:58, archived)

yup, switched off that Q-fan crapola, case is old and stuffed with hard drives so that needs replacing too
I'll go and shovel some more money into Micro Direct next week
( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sun 31 May 2009, 22:00, archived)

You'll want a case that'll take 120mm fans all round,
the bigger the fan, the slower it needs to spin, so 120mm is now the quiet computing standard. You can get gaming cases with 240mm fans in the side, but that's just daft.

Scythe and Noctua do the best fans, you're looking at £12-14 each.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sun 31 May 2009, 22:03, archived)

trane chillers

( mongychops, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:54, archived)

Sorry to disappoint JMG
Some of us went to meet some people from /board last night and we all got on very well indeed. Much alcohol and fried chicken was consumed.
( The Cat's Mother Not a People Person., Sun 31 May 2009, 21:27, archived)

According to some, I was going to beat Becky up.
Then fake an asthma attack.
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Sun 31 May 2009, 21:38, archived)

I am still amused by this. As is Becky I think.

( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Sun 31 May 2009, 21:38, archived)

How are you feeling?
I'm just a bit bleurrgghhh.
( The Cat's Mother Not a People Person., Sun 31 May 2009, 21:40, archived)

Headachy, tired and my knees REALLY hurt.
Why do my knees hurt? Were you hitting them whilst I slept?
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Sun 31 May 2009, 21:45, archived)

Not guilty.
I blame all those underground stairs.
( The Cat's Mother Not a People Person., Sun 31 May 2009, 21:54, archived)

I'm not sure who decided you were going to beat me up
but I heard rumours of it on the night, but thought nothing of it seeing as it would have been a bit lame.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:52, archived)

Hello.
It was lovely to meet you yesterday. It's always good to put a face to a name and also to find out that everyone is so nice and friendly.
( The Cat's Mother Not a People Person., Sun 31 May 2009, 21:56, archived)

It was lovely meeting you as well
*is total fangirl*
sorry I made a bit of a tit of myself talking to you.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sun 31 May 2009, 22:01, archived)

It was really nice chatting to you and devil in tights.
You've nothing to apologise for, I may have been a little drunk myself : )
( The Cat's Mother Not a People Person., Sun 31 May 2009, 22:07, archived)

It's amazing how sweaty internet men get caught up in this sort of thing.
I bet they had a stash of jelly knocking about somewhere Just In Case.
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Sun 31 May 2009, 21:57, archived)

I have no doubt
and a paddling pool prefilled with mud if the jelly wasn't just right ,)
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sun 31 May 2009, 22:02, archived)

i can't wait to hold another bingo session, it worked, great times

( mongychops, Sun 31 May 2009, 21:47, archived)

I have nothing to add JMG,
I just want to be a part of this.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sun 31 May 2009, 21:53, archived)