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Oh HI there! I aer Cuffbert :o3
I did giev Gruffbert a plaen to gard, it was a French plaen and the pilot dids say "OH BOJNOUR Cuffers are we not bon enuogh to be garded by you?" and I said "GNAAH SHUSH IT UP YUO STUPID FLYING IDIOT I AM CUFFERS I asked for CHICKINS and FISH PAYMENT not rubbesh SNAILS payment so SHUSH IT UP" and then the pilost has lost the plaen becuse he is RUBBISH and ON STRIKE :o3

Can I haev a fish now plese? :o3
(Cuffbert, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:50, archived)


(Police Dog bark bark bark, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:51, archived)
*pawsnouts*

(Police Dog bark bark bark, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:51, archived)
*belly scratchings*

(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 14:10, archived)
SHIT OFF YOU SHITTING SHITTER

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:51, archived)
I don't know Cuffbert, it said in the Telegraph that you charged the taxpayer to clean all the fish out of your moat.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:51, archived)
I claened it out PRESONALLY OM NOM NOM
:o3
(Cuffbert, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:54, archived)
I'm glad Gordon Brown is showing his commiserations for Susan Boyle and doesn't seem to comment on this story

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! __, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:51, archived)
I didn't realise she was 48 until today.
I thought she was in her 70s.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:53, archived)
Oh fucking hell

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! __, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:53, archived)
?

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:54, archived)
WHAT'S THAT FOR, FUCKER?

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! __, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:54, archived)
What are you saying "oh fucking hell" to?

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:55, archived)
Not having sex ages you, it's true!

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:53, archived)
I hate you.
You're shitter than the french.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:52, archived)
( . )( . )

(IWishFrizWasDead, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:53, archived)
lol hundreds of people are probably dead
or at best stranded at sea

fucking hilarious.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:54, archived)
Cheer up
they might all turn out to be French.
Zootalols!
(I helped save b3ta! M o D, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:56, archived)
SEA FISH liek TUNARS GNAAAH! :o3

(Cuffbert, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:56, archived)
Is there a level beyond which tragedy is not funny then?
Or does it depend who raises it. If JMG were to mention that the lost plane was his fault could we laugh at that? What if only about 3 or 4 people were on a small plane, would that be funny?

THE WORLD NEEDS TO KNOW
(Bazongaloid, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:57, archived)
I think the fact it's still ongoing makes it worse,
but generally I'm not a fan of many of the lol death type of jokes on here.
I'm not saying they shouldn't be posted but I reserve the right to sarcastically reply to them.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:59, archived)
WHAT THE SHITTING FUCK IS GOING ON

(I helped save b3ta! Derpasaurus DOG FARTS, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:54, archived)
CUFFBERT CUFF BERT CUFF. BERT. CUFFBERT
Cuffbert posted.
(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:54, archived)
This is worse than your podcasts

(I helped save b3ta! Gooch Is neither here nor there, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:54, archived)
Cuffbert isn't baldmonkey.

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:55, archived)
really?
who is it then?
(I helped save b3ta! Gooch Is neither here nor there, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:55, archived)
Druid.

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:56, archived)
I think your mocking me

(I helped save b3ta! Gooch Is neither here nor there, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:57, archived)
"you're" and I'm not.

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:57, archived)
Fair enough
Cheers for the corrections
(I helped save b3ta! Gooch Is neither here nor there, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:59, archived)
What MoT said.
^^^^
(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:59, archived)
MoT is right. :)

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:59, archived)
it was me, i crashed the plane

(I helped save b3ta! Lightguy hail satan, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:55, archived)
+in the OP

(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 14:11, archived)
This is Gilgamesh's worst comedy account.

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:55, archived)
I *heart* cuffbert
He's loads funnier than the majority of folk.
(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:56, archived)
Oh, hello Cuffbert!
I think it's a terrible shame that the silly pilot didn't fulfill his part of the contract.
(Muffbert, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 13:58, archived)
CUFFERS!
HAI THERE
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 14:00, archived)
Hi there Blues Tarts :o3

(Cuffbert, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 14:08, archived)