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Hello, you people.
I am in the midlands. Shortly I will be in that Cork.
What are your weekend plans?
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 16:55, archived)
right - maybe drink if anyone EVER answers my messages
and then sleep play and sleep
(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 16:56, archived)
this, fucking selfish cow I know lost her job today and now isn't in the mood for the pub.
how very dare she.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 16:57, archived)
well one guy can't spend any more money, which is fair enough.
the second guy has JUST responded cos he left his phone at home
the third has to babysit aww
and the fourth one, who is actually a girl, SUGGESTED going out because of how it is her birthday.
(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 16:58, archived)
so 2/4 people who i sounded out, and i'm sure she'll have talked to some other friends also yay

(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 16:59, archived)
2/4?
half a person?
(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:01, archived)
fractions can work with groups of numbers too, you maths fail.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:04, archived)
I'm sorry, that was too much maths for me

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:04, archived)
chevron!

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:06, archived)
the fifth one went wee wee wee all the way home

(__, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:04, archived)
And got a £30 fine for being drunk and disorderly?

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:06, archived)
you chevron breaker!

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:06, archived)
hurrah, she's changed her mind.
I now have to be empathic.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 16:59, archived)
This is your chance to be SexFace
Becoming man and machine, sympathy fuck extreme.
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:07, archived)
no, she's a mate and engaged.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:08, archived)
WWSFD?

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:13, archived)
GIAW

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:18, archived)
I thought it was Theoban's turn to be Sexface today?

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:08, archived)
Nah, it's my turn today
But I'm not that keen on the sexings so Chompy can take it.
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:12, archived)
Oh HELLO

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:20, archived)
he's not being SexFace today

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:21, archived)
Hello :)

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:25, archived)
How are you?
I just ordered a top hat. I'm getting back into my hat scene
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:28, archived)
I'm pretty good thanks, been to pick up my new stylish glasses :D
Is it a properly dapper top hat? Are you all better now?
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:29, archived)
Still in quite a bit of pain, but magic pillz have done their thing.
It's got a veil. Not a mini one though. Proper size!
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:37, archived)
Corr!
And I hope you get better soon :)
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:40, archived)
delicious booze

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:04, archived)
If you're at luton airport I'm disapointed you didn't come to see me.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 16:56, archived)
Ooh, whereabouts in the Midlands are you ?

(I helped save b3ta! FoldsFive, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 16:57, archived)
Thomastown.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:00, archived)
Ah, THAT Midlands.

(I helped save b3ta! FoldsFive, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:02, archived)
Yes.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:03, archived)
Not this midlands, a much more interesting midlands ;)

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:01, archived)
I'm looking after two kids - one of them is playing super mario galaxy
and the other is eating fluff from the carpet and going HI! HI! HI!

I plan to get them to bed and then open wine.
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 16:58, archived)
Can I ask a rather dull b3ta related question?
Which page gets the most views on average and how many non members view b3ta generally?
(PsychoChomp, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:00, archived)
fp most - by a big factor
then board, then links, then talk then qotw

no stats on users vs lurkers
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:04, archived)
I'm suprised /talk gets more than /qotw.
Where's the newsletter in that list?
(PsychoChomp, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:04, archived)
The newsletter isn't on the list.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:06, archived)
it's not
but it's not like with like as the newsletter is something you read once rather than refresh multiple times.

a person on talk might create 100s of page impressions in a session where as a newsletter reader creates 1.
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:08, archived)
ooh I've just realised I've read the stats wrong
as basically the newsletter and the QOTW gets a new URL every week - it means I was comparing ONE week of QOTW with one MONTH of talk.

Oh it's complex! But now it looks like the order is

FP
QOTW
BOARD
LINKS
TALK

But fuck knows really.
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:21, archived)
I think if lurkers read /Talk for entertainment and didn't contribute to this hovel of insults and attention seeking then they've got problems
FP - quick look, funny.
Main - Talent funny*.
QOTW - Reading funnies*.
Talk - Autistic food fight.

But I love talk, I wouldn't change it for a thing. it's like one of those 99p footballs. so shit to kick but great fun to shove down your trousers and pretend you've got willy cancer.

i.cr3ation.co.uk/dl/s1/jpg/howijoinedqotw.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:28, archived)
hahahahaha!
that's brilliant :D
(I helped save b3ta! spesh., Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:32, archived)
I want to make love to you and hold your face

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:34, archived)
I must say I'd have guessed that QOTW would beat us by a country mile.
They've far more posters.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:05, archived)
we're all F5ing.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:06, archived)
qotw does more unique page views that talk
that means qotw has more individuals on it but they view less pages each
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:10, archived)
they do
I read the numbers wrong - see above
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:24, archived)
I thought the fp was all of b3ta for months in the days when I only used to lurk.
I was quite surprised to click on a link and see an actual board.
(I helped save b3ta! FoldsFive, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:06, archived)
I'm going to travel back in time, point at you, and laugh.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:10, archived)
They'll go to bed a lot quicker with some wine inside them.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:01, archived)
+ thousand

(likeajackhammer, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:02, archived)
Is one of them Donkey Gums?

(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:03, archived)
Can't be, I've never played Mario Galaxy before.

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:14, archived)
You have to though at some point. It's Mario Month!
March 2010 = MAR10
(I helped save b3ta! Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:25, archived)
I'm going to sit right here crying and eating cake

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 16:58, archived)
I'm going to spend all of my weekend in the Midlands.
And then I have a few days of holiday, which I'll spend in the midlands.
(I helped save b3ta! my other username is a porsche , posting shit pictures so you don't have to, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 16:58, archived)
Wash the car, cut the grass, clean the house, gym
Maybe go to the cinema, might go cycling through one of the forests, possibly visit some friends.
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 16:59, archived)
Pub crawl round Marbella port, assuming I can stop snotting in time

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:02, archived)
I may be meeting that Theoban tomorrow.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:03, archived)
Nice one. Give him one for me.

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:09, archived)
A sex, a pint, or a signed photo of Arthur Scargill?

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:10, archived)
Yes,

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:10, archived)
having my friends over to my new place...they'll be bringing my birthday gift...a month late...
grilling, drinking, grilling, eating, drinking, mofo basketball yo
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:06, archived)
I will be in the Midlands this weekend

(I helped save b3ta! spesh., Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:09, archived)
I get a piece of paper
then what I do is cut it into tiny little squares.

I do this all weekend.
(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:16, archived)
What do you use to cut?

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:18, archived)
Mind power.

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:26, archived)
Tomorrow and Sunday I shall be spending my time in the loving warmth of my family
tonight I will be getting shitfaced with my friends.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 17:21, archived)