Who would you snog under the b3ta mistletoe?

( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 17:46, archived)

Nobody, there's a global pandemic going on you see.
But knowing that I'm safe, I'd spunk over the lot of you. Especially the racists.
( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 17:54, archived)

Dear God, man, you really are impressing precisely no-one with this charade.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 15 Dec 2020, 18:57, archived)

Incorrect.
I am keeping myself entertained for one. That said, I couldn't really bring myself to spunk over any of you.
( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 23:49, archived)

physical contact with people outside of your immediate household, member

(dribble, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 18:03, archived)

Not really

( Cassius Kray floats like a butterfly, stings like a trout, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 21:27, archived)

Dearest b, cheers

(Nicki Minaj, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 18:07, archived)

brb, while wearing my Proud Boys t-shirt

( Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 18:24, archived)

Hes a modern day martin luther king, Nelson Mandela sent him a text before he died asking him to overturn forum apartheid

(Nicki Minaj, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 18:41, archived)

martin luther tiger
( Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 18:42, archived)

martin luther jonathan
(dribble, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 18:46, archived)

martin luther king jr. !!!
why do people always forget that? otherwise you may be referring to someone completely different.
( Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 18:52, archived)

Because it's some stupid American wank? And no child should be called junior

(Nicki Minaj, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 18:54, archived)

Unless they flunk math.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 16 Dec 2020, 8:27, archived)

fRaNkEnStEiN wAs ThE sCiEnTiSt HuRr DuRr

( Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 19:05, archived)

I actually read that book, years ago penguin did classics for a quid . Its shit

(Nicki Minaj, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 19:42, archived)

It's got comedy value
in that a monster made from bits of corpses comes to life mentally fully formed rather than as a blank slate or childlike, and immediately starts spouting off philosophy bollocks
(dribble, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 19:51, archived)

Well she was a gobby teenager

(Nicki Minaj, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 20:09, archived)

Mary SMELLY *I* call her!!!
You're right though, it's rubbish
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 20:23, archived)

It's not called 'Superman 1' you IDIOT!!!

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 20:24, archived)

ffs everyone knows it was superman, supererman, superestman and then superspiderguardian: the quickening

( Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 20:44, archived)

Benedict Cumberbatch

( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 19:10, archived)

Hahaha, surely you mean Bendydick Cucumberpatch, ahahahaha!!!

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 15 Dec 2020, 19:33, archived)

Oh man imagine being that witty!!!
Classic!!!!
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 20:20, archived)

what IS the fascination with that freak

(dribble, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 19:52, archived)

beats me
he looks like an alien and can't say the word 'penguin' properly
( Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 19:56, archived)

+off

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 20:18, archived)

He's like a one man hall of mirrors.

( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 23:50, archived)

It's the cheekbones mostly

( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Wed 16 Dec 2020, 6:55, archived)

the sexiest b3tan

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 19:24, archived)

Doctor Dyslexia

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 19:46, archived)

Pantsseatflyer was great

(Nicki Minaj, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 19:50, archived)

some of his pics were genuinely sinister

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 21:05, archived)

Leave Gonz alone!

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 15 Dec 2020, 20:19, archived)

Richard mcbeef RIP

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 20:21, archived)

dunno who that is

(dribble, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 20:29, archived)

ariana grande lezzing it up with that fat one from little mix

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 20:23, archived)

nonce *and* chubby-chaser, congratulations

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 20:25, archived)

she's late 20s mate, she only looks like a preteen.

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 20:42, archived)

Legal Noncing for Dummies, by The Guffalo

( Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 20:50, archived)

Sounds great, sign me up!

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 20:56, archived)

take her to france then you won't be judged

(dribble, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 21:54, archived)

alright, Jeremyyyyyy
(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 21:59, archived)

classic queen
(dribble, Tue 15 Dec 2020, 22:08, archived)