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What's the upper age limit on a child you'd confidently say you could beat up if that child was a martial arts champion within their own age group?
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Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 15 May 2023, 20:11,
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Depending on their height and weight
14
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Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Mon 15 May 2023, 20:12,
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I admire your pluck.
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Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 15 May 2023, 20:15,
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I reckon there are probably some pretty hard 13-year-olds out there.
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Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 15 May 2023, 20:57,
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Disgusting.
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brb Monkhouse Stampede, Mon 15 May 2023, 22:49,
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What's your shtyle?
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mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 15 May 2023, 20:57,
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A little-known school of kung fu, derived from the famous 'Drunken Master', called 'Damp Spastic.'
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Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 15 May 2023, 20:58,
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The school of the legendary "Clammy Hand" technique
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mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 15 May 2023, 21:02,
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Kick them in the nads
Then sit down and use my weight against their lifting techniques
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Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Mon 15 May 2023, 22:49,
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I'll hold your coat
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mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 15 May 2023, 22:58,
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7.
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THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Mon 15 May 2023, 20:33,
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Fight Club +
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Turtle Power & Knuckles, Mon 15 May 2023, 21:44,
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Are there guns?
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mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 15 May 2023, 20:52,
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No, that would be stupid.
Typical bloody American.
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Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 15 May 2023, 20:57,
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MAH RIGHTS! MAH GOD-GIVEN RIGHTS!
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mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 15 May 2023, 20:59,
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Assuming that they are ONLY allowed to use martial arts moves and I'm allowed to punch then as hard as possible in the face / kick them as hard as possible in the bollocks I'm fairly confident I could beat up a 12 year old
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2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 15 May 2023, 21:34,
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Thank you for this considered answer.
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Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 15 May 2023, 21:35,
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I hope this helps with your research
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2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 15 May 2023, 21:36,
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A storm drain must be the worst possible environment for a child to learn martial arts.
It's pitch black, smells of shit and you'd keep slipping over with all the water everywhere. And there's no facilities for hand washing before you handle your post-fight pizza.
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Turtle Power & Knuckles, Mon 15 May 2023, 22:12,
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All of those things help build character and valuable intestinal bacteria
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mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 15 May 2023, 22:18,
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This is a really good question, I'll give it some thought and get back to you asap.
:ETA:
One must consider which martial discipline would be toughest to beat, but also which produces or attracts the largest, toughest, and most violent fighters.
I'm 99kg, just under 2m tall with quite a solid jaw, but almost anyone under 18 is going to have significant advantages over me in terms of speed and stamina, a martial arts champion especially so...
High school seniors, no chance. Juniors, maybe.
I'd like to think I could beat anyone under 10, but I've seen some fast and vicious little boxers who could properly knock me out with a lucky or well timed hit, and I've seen some chunky judoka/rikishi who perhaps outweigh me, so I'll drop it to anyone under 9...
But there must be some 8 year old submission artists out there, so I can't guarantee that one couldn't trip me up and lock me into something I'd instantly tap out to, so let's drop it to somewhere around 6.
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brb Monkhouse Stampede, Mon 15 May 2023, 22:13,
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no it's about fighting not dating
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mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 15 May 2023, 22:57,
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idgi
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brb Monkhouse Stampede, Mon 15 May 2023, 23:26,
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I think that's how most of them start
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Turtle Power & Knuckles, Mon 15 May 2023, 23:28,
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They ask for directions to the fictional town of Suckham, which is pronounced "Suckem"
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mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 15 May 2023, 23:39,
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isdgi
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brb Monkhouse Stampede, Mon 15 May 2023, 23:47,
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Ok, forget it. Any idea how I can get to Suckham from here?
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mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 15 May 2023, 23:49,
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Excuse me? The quickest way to Suckham?
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mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 15 May 2023, 23:54,
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We just can't seem to find the way to Suckham, we've been at this hours!
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mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 15 May 2023, 23:56,
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Some kid has developed a habit of chaining his bike to our deck before he takes the school bus, I've just bought a sledgehammer to help break the cycle
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mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 15 May 2023, 23:05,
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Cut the chain so he thinks it got stolen
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Turtle Power & Knuckles, Mon 15 May 2023, 23:15,
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This lie is spinning out of control, I know that sounds like it's trying to be a pun but it isn't
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mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 15 May 2023, 23:44,
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LOTW ->
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Turtle Power & Knuckles, Mon 15 May 2023, 23:49,
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Combine these two and you'd have a full head of hair
ichef.bbci.co.uk/images/ic/976x549/p0fnbyxn.jpg
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Turtle Power & Knuckles, Mon 15 May 2023, 23:17,
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