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afternoon, bellend's
I'm going to start looking for a new job this week

lol job
(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 12:06, archived)
We’ve just advertised for a Scrum Master
Just in case you wanted to be paid a lot of money for a job that adds absolutely no value to society
(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 12:35, archived)
*Slack alert from Annoying Cow*
*Asking for the 5th "huddle" of the day because she hasn't really got work to do but wants to appear productive*
(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 12:43, archived)
Maybe she's just trying to get into your Trousers, Dave.

(I helped save b3ta! Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 12:49, archived)
God it’s like some ‘nam flashback

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 12:49, archived)
*Uses Post-It notes like it's the '90s*

(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 12:52, archived)
Post-It notes stopped working after a while
I just started to ignore anything yellow and square.
(8to12WeeksinScottishRegion Listening to Fur Q - Uzi Lover, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 12:54, archived)
*switches to neon orange*

(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 12:55, archived)
I miss *real* Post-its.
All this Mural shite can bugger off.
(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 17:58, archived)
Is that for a drinking game?

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 12:56, archived)
It certainly drives me to drink

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 12:58, archived)
a fucking what now

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 12:59, archived)
Exactly

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 13:03, archived)
Don't look into it - you won't be able to un-learn some of the BS.

(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 13:04, archived)
^

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 13:07, archived)
I still think about Six Sigma...
It seems pleasant in comparison.
(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 13:09, archived)
Thankfully I’ve managed to avoid that one

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 13:15, archived)
It's a bit old. '90s, early '00s.

(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 14:31, archived)
+ ot

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword now that's fresh, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 16:15, archived)
Become a career politician
I'd vote for Queef Smegwin
(8to12WeeksinScottishRegion Listening to Fur Q - Uzi Lover, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 12:40, archived)
Time to showcase those ham-touching skills

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti., Mon 6 Jan 2025, 12:57, archived)
Food again or furniture e-tailing?

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Mon 6 Jan 2025, 13:00, archived)
Edible Sofas

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 13:03, archived)
Food for sure
I want to be a charcutier
(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 15:07, archived)
#hamtoucher

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Mon 6 Jan 2025, 15:42, archived)
You should try and find something that combines all your passions. Some sort of poncy cooking show in the buff apart from an overpriced pair of trainers.
Call it "The Naked Cunt"
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 13:01, archived)
Excellent idea

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 15:08, archived)
just re-visited this and can't stop laughing

(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt, Sun 12 Jan 2025, 10:04, archived)
Lego are looking for a product safety officer for their electrical and digital products
- in Denmark, with no relocation package.
(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 13:27, archived)
Sounds fair
You could live in the factory à la Phantom of the Opera.
(8to12WeeksinScottishRegion Listening to Fur Q - Uzi Lover, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 13:31, archived)
New job boss?

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 14:09, archived)
SIR I AM NOT A MONEY THIEF

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Mon 6 Jan 2025, 14:43, archived)
What happened with your old job?
Did you get caught smearing smeg on the smoked smews?
(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 6 Jan 2025, 16:00, archived)
I reckon he got caught using his work laptop to look at Lorraine Kelly upskirts.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Mon 6 Jan 2025, 16:02, archived)

Lorraine Matthew
(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 16:04, archived)
why don't you just retire and leave more work for us young'uns

(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 17:15, archived)
You are not young
- immaturity doesn't count
(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 17:32, archived)
I AM YOUNG
i run green
keep my teeth nice and clean
see my friend, see the sights
i feel alright
(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt, Mon 6 Jan 2025, 18:42, archived)