It only takes two lols to burn a thousand clicks

(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Wed 18 Jun 2025, 11:37, Reply)

Alright, Kelly Jones, you complete cunt

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 18 Jun 2025, 11:40, Reply)

I'd like to see him try to burn a thousand trees with one match, the fucking prick

(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Wed 18 Jun 2025, 12:12, Reply)

Smokey Bear is a fascist by the way
manifesto
"Only you can prevent wildfires" - the victim-blaming starts here
Keir Starmer picked up his dry leaves for him
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 18 Jun 2025, 13:04, Reply)

I think I should be able to avoid starting wildfires myself, not sure if I have the power to prevent everyone/everything else from starting one though

(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Wed 18 Jun 2025, 13:52, Reply)

not with that attitude you won't

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jun 2025, 13:54, Reply)

I'm manifesting a burning forest right now

(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Wed 18 Jun 2025, 14:05, Reply)

minferno, maniforesting

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 18 Jun 2025, 14:08, Reply)

Smokey Bear don't take kindly to that kind of talk

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 18 Jun 2025, 13:58, Reply)

"In 2022, 87% of wildfires were caused by humans."
Remember, #OnlyYou can prevent 87% of wildfires!
(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Wed 18 Jun 2025, 14:08, Reply)

The aim is to get it to 100% of wildfires caused by humans, then we can prevent them all!

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 18 Jun 2025, 14:10, Reply)

In all seriousness though,
Smokey Bear being a fascist is the only reasonable explanation for why DOGE didn't have him shot and stuffed.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Wed 18 Jun 2025, 14:11, Reply)

Musk in a furry suit you say??
The hat is wrong but the rest adds up.
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 18 Jun 2025, 14:14, Reply)

Why has he got a bulging crotch? :(
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Smokey_Bear#/media/File:Smokey_Bear_sign_at_Mulholland_entrance_to_Runyon_Canyon_Park,_Los_Angeles,_California,_USA.png
(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Wed 18 Jun 2025, 14:20, Reply)

"Wildfires give me the fucking horn"

(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Wed 18 Jun 2025, 14:21, Reply)

"They only way to curb my tumescence is by whacking it with this shovel"

(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Wed 18 Jun 2025, 14:27, Reply)

Feels like a lot of responsibility but if Smokey Bear says I have to turn vigilante and start hunting down arsonists then who am I to argue?

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 18 Jun 2025, 17:22, Reply)

What kind of crime using matches is often committed by pirates?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 18 Jun 2025, 19:01, Reply)

laaarrrrrrrrrceny

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 18 Jun 2025, 21:08, Reply)

fuck

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 18 Jun 2025, 23:45, Reply)