If you could meet anyone from history
How big would you say my cock is?
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:12, archived)

I would tell all of them it's tiny.

( ArthurTheRat, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:13, archived)

"hello, adolf" I'd say
"mykeyboy has a cock resembling a piece of dandruff on a louse's pube"
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:13, archived)

I would say it's 12" long,
but by a cruel twist of fate only 1" in circumference.
( Druid, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:15, archived)

pffft
no use to anyone ;)
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:16, archived)

A gardener's dibber?

( Druid, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:17, archived)

Donut punch.
Do a dozen at a time.
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:19, archived)

and keep them on during sex for little extra girth,
though all his girlfriends would end-up with diabetes
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:26, archived)

not as big as Mr V's

( Jadeviper was still alive on, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:15, archived)

Bigger
Easily
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:19, archived)

he's longer
you're marginally thicker
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:20, archived)

we still
talking about penises?
( Devil Duck: ( ' )< and his cunning stunts, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:21, archived)

yes
Bunny and I compared hand/wrist sizes
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:22, archived)

with glasses

( Giant bunny jumping out like a large happy tourettes rabbit, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:23, archived)

oh aye, that too :)

( Jadeviper was still alive on, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:24, archived)

If what you're suggesting is true,
poor old Beadle.
( Druid, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:23, archived)

On the other hand...

( OneSullenBrit *air sandwiches*, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:29, archived)

I'd meet John Holmes
and tell him you put him utterly to shame.*


*may in fact be untrue
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:15, archived)

Holmes Merrick
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:16, archived)

I *heart* you!

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:17, archived)

pffft
you have just caused me to spray cranberry juice down my front, damn you
( Gizmo.mp3 does not exist, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:18, archived)

there are worse things I've caused people to spray over their fronts

( Jadeviper was still alive on, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:19, archived)

Vimto?

( Druid, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:21, archived)

I'd not say that was worse
but that would depend on if we are thinking of the same thing
( Giant bunny jumping out like a large happy tourettes rabbit, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:21, archived)

depends if they're at work or not

( Jadeviper was still alive on, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:23, archived)

*snort*
well then, it was their own silly fault
( Giant bunny jumping out like a large happy tourettes rabbit, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:24, archived)

makes a change from them just wearing a groove in the underside of their desks...

( Jadeviper was still alive on, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:28, archived)

I have the best mental image now
of you walking into an office and all the men going boing! off the underside of the desks
( Giant bunny jumping out like a large happy tourettes rabbit, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:32, archived)

if only :P

( Jadeviper was still alive on, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:36, archived)

Imagine the comedy ruler sound they would all make

( Giant bunny jumping out like a large happy tourettes rabbit, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:38, archived)

heh :D

( Jadeviper was still alive on, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:42, archived)

You fucking gay

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:20, archived)

meet shag
( ArthurTheRat, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:18, archived)

I'd say that sadly
it's thicker than it is long.

Making it a Chode.
( Bud Muhnquai Update your profile or fuck off, Sun 23 Oct 2005, 20:28, archived)