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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Good morning, Deacons.
I had a lovely evening last night with food, much wine and B3tans. So lovely that I missed my stop on the tube this morning. My heartiest thanks to those who attended.

Those who know me may be more than a little surprised to know that tomorrow night I am attending A FOOTBALL MATCH. That's right, I'm now really 'into sport'. What may I expect? Lots of uncouth, bellowing common people, I know that much.
What are you 'really into'? Unless you're a woman, you are not 'really into' 'my mum' so don't fucking bother. I said don't.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 8:49, 102 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
A pie and bovril at half time is a must.
Get two, incase being around real men makes you drop them.
(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 8:52, Reply)
Bovril?
People drink gravy at 'sport matches'? Dear God.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 8:53, Reply)
It's awesome!

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 8:55, Reply)
Beefy tea.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 8:55, Reply)
Liquid beef and brown confusion.
It's great.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:45, Reply)
A pie and bovril? Where do you live, 1975?

(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 8:53, Reply)
Glasgow, so yes.

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 8:55, Reply)
Ha.

(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 8:56, Reply)
Who are you and what have you done with Monty?

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 8:54, Reply)
Maybe you should show him your calendar?
if it's the real Monty, he'll hate it.
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 22 Nov 2011, 8:55, Reply)
Yeah show us yer 'calendar' love.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:06, Reply)
Lol
It was last years. Twelve lovely photos of Bowie.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:08, Reply)
You can expect to be shocked at how expensive it is.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 8:54, Reply)
No I won't.
All expenses paid inc free bar....
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:01, Reply)
Ah, attending a football match
not watching a football match.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:04, Reply)
Quite so.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:05, Reply)
I believe that you can expect, spitting, swearing, beer bellies, tattoos, fights, fat neck rolls, tracksuits, lager, vomit etc etc
I am really into snowboarding, because I'm young and "rad"
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 8:54, Reply)
That's very similar to what you can expect at my birthday bash.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 8:55, Reply)
I provide about eight of them at your birthday bash

(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:08, Reply)
Haha!

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:12, Reply)
I'm really into dance.
I think you should expect to get caught up in the mood of the crowd. I've never been particularly into sports, this year, I watched the Grand Final of the footy with people from my uni and got uttely caught up in it! Had a ball.
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 22 Nov 2011, 8:55, Reply)
So a kind of Nuremberg Rally vibe?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:01, Reply)
yeah, kinda.

(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:04, Reply)
Colin McRae won that if I remember correctly

(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:11, Reply)
I'm sure that's hilarious but I haven't a clue what it means.
Sorry.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:13, Reply)
Using rally in the racing car sense
You were wrong, it isn't hilarious
(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:18, Reply)
I'm really into your mother!
and now i can go home, because i won't better that today
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 8:55, Reply)
Expect a surprising amount of quick wit and humour, but also a less surprising amount of
thickheaded bigotry and thuggery.

What match are you going to see?

Alt: I'm 'really into', well, football actually. Comics. Improv. Football and Left handed Masturbation. I think they are the main things.
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 8:56, Reply)
I believe one of the sides is 'Arsenal United'.
I'm basing this guess upon the fact that it's at Highbury.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:02, Reply)
I bet you £100 it's not at Highbury.
You can add me at the end of the list of creditors, I'm not in any hurry.
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:06, Reply)
You know what I mean, you bender.
The stadium in Highbury.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:08, Reply)
I'm just trying to prevent you getting beaten up for clearly being out of place.
You'll thank me later.
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:09, Reply)
I am resigned to this happening.
I think I'll take one of my swords just in case.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:10, Reply)
We're in the posh bit.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:13, Reply)
So what are you saying? he needs a musket, not a sword?

(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:14, Reply)
Probably worth sticking a bayonet on the end, just to be sure.

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:16, Reply)
Bovril out of goblets, then?
Super.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:17, Reply)
Breasts

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword w⚓, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 8:56, Reply)
At last.
The voice of reason.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 8:57, Reply)
I go to every home game, and try to make it to most of the aways as well

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword w⚓, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:00, Reply)
You ought to be aware that the likelihood of encountering working class people is high at these places.
Nakers has offered some information about how to spot these types up there ^ but you shouldn't have any trouble identifying them.

At the moment I am 'really into' going out every night, making the most of it before I can no longer do this. My wife does not approve, but as I told her: I am drinking for two now.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:00, Reply)
You can't drink alcohol
Within sight of the pitch. Also, most stadiums are non smoking. Enjoy
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:01, Reply)
I won't actually be watching any of the footba'.
I am going strictly for drinking.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:03, Reply)
BUT WHAT IF THEY MAKE YOU WATCH SOME OF IT MONTY : /

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:05, Reply)
It won't happen.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:08, Reply)
Seeing as you won't be able to drink
During the game, and you won't be able to smoke, I can see no option but to watch the match.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:18, Reply)
Massive drugs are ok though?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:20, Reply)
Does this ruling affect
blind fans,
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:04, Reply)
I'm really into being single.
I fucking love it.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:04, Reply)
Now mean it.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:04, Reply)
Tsk! you can see right through me.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:11, Reply)
At the moment I'm really into those books Game of Thrones was adapted from
Much to the amusement of Miss B. I've had to promise her this will not lead to World of Warcraft.
(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:11, Reply)
The y need MOAR tits.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:11, Reply)
You can apply this reasoning to most things

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:12, Reply)
Indeed. I also really like Formula 1
But Stunned's point still very much applies.
(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:13, Reply)
Oh yes it will my friend
www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/game-of-thrones-is-'fantasy-gateway-drug'-201111044505/
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:14, Reply)
Gotta love the Mash.
That is actually where I get all my news.
(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:15, Reply)
If it's not on the Mash, it's not worth knowing about
This is why I'm so endlessly amused, instead of worried, by the Eurozone debt crisis
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:20, Reply)
What's the capital of Greece?
About €2.50. Wahaha!
(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:21, Reply)
Nah, it's Athens
Thicko
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:23, Reply)
I really fucking hope it is Athens now

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:24, Reply)
It is, you're ok you humourless oaf.

(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:29, Reply)
Thank god I can maintain my twin standards of accuracy and dullness

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:31, Reply)
And maintain them effortlessly.
Kudos sir.
(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:44, Reply)
Champions League, your havin' a laugh.
Borussia Dortmund at the Emirates.

Curry first?

Then football until half time, free beers and leave some time during the second half.

Fackin' 'ell. I neeeed a faaaaag.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:11, Reply)
Yes sir. Very good sir.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:16, Reply)
Fuck off are ya
Who's playing then? Eh? Eh?

At the moment I'm into my job, because I have absolutely no choice but to be. I'm also into losing weight, which is a nice change. And fisting. Always the fisting.

Morning everyone.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:12, Reply)
Morning,

(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:14, Reply)
How do squire?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:16, Reply)
Tip top thanks good sir.

(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:17, Reply)
Arsenal vs some other ghastly oiks.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:14, Reply)
GERMANS.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:15, Reply)
Excellent.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:16, Reply)
Wear your best armbands.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:17, Reply)
I always do.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:18, Reply)
Can't he swim?
Or does he explode on contact with water?
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:24, Reply)
Only if it's holy water

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:26, Reply)
OK... am still somewhat confused, old boy
This is a bit like me announcing that I'm off to a Robbie Williams concert. Or a non-gay swingers' party.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:17, Reply)
Corporate ligging.
I have managed to persuade the old recidivist to suckle from the corporate teat.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:19, Reply)
Right, so, you've scored corporate hospitality at a club you don't support
and have decided that the best way to make a good impression is to take Monty along and put beer in him.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:21, Reply)
This^

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:23, Reply)
Light the touch paper and retire.
Got my firm's tickets. Got 'em Boxing Day and New Year's Day too.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:24, Reply)
Maybe it will be like Meat Loaf in the director's box at Anfield
in the 51st State.
(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:25, Reply)
I like this
Not least because you have just called Monty a fat bastard who's prone to spontaneous combustion
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:28, Reply)
Only inadvertently

(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:29, Reply)
+" "

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:32, Reply)
I intend to make the poor man rue this decision for the rest of his miserable life.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:26, Reply)
Not for long then

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:27, Reply)
26 hours and counting.
I am heavily armed and have a nasty temper.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:34, Reply)
The lure of gratis lager is to strong to resist.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:22, Reply)
That is certainly understandable
I wouldn't personally go to a Williams gig even if there was free (and obligatory) cocaine at the door, but I suppose a football match is easier to ignore
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:25, Reply)
Fuck it I'd go to see Bronski Beat in Birmingham if someone offered me a free half of Fosters.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:27, Reply)
I don't believe you
Bronski Beat? Perhaps. Birmingham? Passable, as long as you were blindfolded between the car and the gig. Fosters? Get to fuck
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:29, Reply)
You sir, are right on the button today
Fosters? *shakes head*
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:30, Reply)
I was trying to imagine the worst thing ever.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:33, Reply)
Fosters tastes of nothing at all

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:34, Reply)
You say it best

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:36, Reply)
Allow me to adapt your original post
Bronski Beat Oasis, supported by Suede
Birmingham Derby, obviously
Fosters Fosters
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:35, Reply)
One of my pals was a guitar tech for Suede
The poor cunt had to see them literally hundreds of times. I met Brett Anderson at a party once. Worst prick ever. He was wearing a fucking kimono.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:44, Reply)
THIS is when you take your sword

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:45, Reply)
I really fucking hate that twat
Whenever I need a favour from my best mate I remind him that my affection for him didn't waver when he revealed that Dog Man Star is his favourite album
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:51, Reply)
I've seen some incredible gigs in Birmingham
But I've never drunk Fosters at any of them.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:31, Reply)
Morning Monsieur Foxtrot.
Glad to hear the call centre is still working out;-)
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:14, Reply)
Morning Herr Stunned
I shall take your jibe in good humour, as I used to work in a call centre and you have done me the good favour of reminding myself that I don't any more. This comparison makes me laugh uncontrollably every time I make it :-)

How's you?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:19, Reply)
I am well, mate.
I have a dull morning today though.

Just thought I'd pop on here seeing as Monters was actually mentioning that he is going to the so-ker.

Wanted to make sure everyone was giving him the abuse he clearly deserves.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:22, Reply)
He deserves the abuse regardless of his evening's activities
Must admit I'm insanely jealous. Never seen a CL match live, for obvious reasons.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:25, Reply)
I spend most of my available time f5ing on the internet, I'm well mad skillz internet me

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:17, Reply)
Don't forget the top drawer insults.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:20, Reply)
(!)

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:23, Reply)
I actually think you'd enjoy it
The sense of occasion when attending a match is never conveyed on TV. As long as you have a basic grasp of what is going on, you'll enjoy it. Free beer/wine/spirits/all of the above may also help though

I'm really into......nothing, sadly. I suppose football but over the last two or three seasons this has waned. Does watching the Sopranos and drinking count?
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:20, Reply)
Waned? WANED?!
Your club doesn't stop needing your support just because you object to Bernard Cribbins' poor management, you know! I have two words for you; STEVE MCCLAREN. Did I head for the hills when his brolly hoved into view at the City Ground? Did I fuck. No hills to head for.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:23, Reply)
Not playing the reserve striker who scored a hat-trick in midweek until 2 mins before the end?
Needing to score when Larsson was suspended and keeping Gardner on the bench?

Give that man an umbrella
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:26, Reply)
I quite agree, he needs his stupid fat head checked
No excuse for spending that sort of money and not turning it into results
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:27, Reply)
He actually hasn't spent that much with getting money for Henderson and Bent

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:29, Reply)
*snigger*

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:30, Reply)
Gaycist

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:31, Reply)
Granted
but there have still been signifcant outlays for insufficient return. Unfortunately Newcastle seem to be showing that it is possible to ship out established names and replace them cheaply and effectively. Ba was a superb signing
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:34, Reply)
We wanted him too

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:35, Reply)
He's the Robert Pattinson of North-East Premiership teams

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:37, Reply)
I've changed my mind now

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:45, Reply)
My interest in this post has waned somewhat.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:28, Reply)
You fucking started the football conversation sunshine!

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:29, Reply)
WANING HARD RIGHT NOW.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:30, Reply)
...and I'm spent

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:31, Reply)
Yes.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:23, Reply)
Hurrah!

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:25, Reply)
Also, sloe gin is fucking nom
I opened the bottle last night and may have consumed approx half
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:27, Reply)
I like the chanting bit the best.
Park, Park, where ever you may be,
You it dogs in your own country.
But it could be worst, you could be scouce
Eating rats in your counicl house.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:27, Reply)
What's that coming over the hill, is it chimbonda, is it chimbonA ?

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:28, Reply)
I don't understand a word of this.
You were missed last night by the way.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:29, Reply)
My insides really really REALLY suck =(

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:30, Reply)
You poor sod.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:42, Reply)
And number one, is robby keen, and number two, is robby keen. And number three? It's robby kean... We all dream of a team of robby kean, a team of robby kean, a team of robby kean.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:29, Reply)
Is it just my utter lack of knowledge about football or are these the most surreal chants ever?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:29, Reply)
Park and Chimbonda are people

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:30, Reply)
Silly Gonz
Chimbonda is not person, only shit fullback
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:31, Reply)
Doe he still play for "The [Amazing/Mighty/Jolly Good] Spurs" ?

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:35, Reply)
Doncaster

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:40, Reply)
Makes slightly more sense
I'll be honest, I'm out of my depth with all this football talk.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:32, Reply)
This is proof that you only need to know 1% about a subject than whoever you're talking too to apear clever.
Those three chants are pretty much the _only_ thing I know about football.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:34, Reply)
I wouldn't go so far as to say it made you appear clever.
If anything, I was knocking IQ points off for each chant...
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:36, Reply)
Best one ever was at Andy Goram, the Rangers keeper.
He was diagnosed schizophrenic, so the chant went, "There's only two Andy Gorams!"
(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:31, Reply)
My favourite was aimed at formerly-shit striker Bobby Zamora
"When the ball hits your head and you're sat in row Z, that's Zamora..."
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:33, Reply)
Hahahahaha!

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:33, Reply)
Or at Tim Howard after it was revealed he had tourettes
My old man said, be a goalkeeper.
I said fuck off, bollocks, you're a cunt!
(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:37, Reply)
There's only one John Oster
Only one John Oster
He used to be shite
But now he's alright
walking in an Oster wonderland

He was always shite, I just always liked the chant
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:44, Reply)
The Liverpool one at Alan Shearer was mildly entertaining
"You should've stayed on the telly!"
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:45, Reply)
Pfft, he's a better manager than he is a pundit
God have mercy on his soul.
(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:47, Reply)
Depends how you season them, Gonz

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:35, Reply)
*recalls rat-au-vin gag from Blackadder Goes Forth*

(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:37, Reply)
I'd try a guinee pig.
I reckon one of those rats that are the size of cats might be quite tasty, can't even imagine how Rodant tastes.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:49, Reply)
You're going into hospitality aren't you?
If so, expect boredom, it's more fun when you can hear peoples imaginative swears.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:28, Reply)
I suppose you could say I'm into old bicycles
Although the obsession has passed. More recently I have been into travelling around meeting B3tans and I expect to continue with this to some extent, but I've put faces to most of the names now. I seem to be between obsessions, how odd.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:30, Reply)
Are you calling BGB an old bike?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:32, Reply)
I was waiting for this comment but didn't expect it from you.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:33, Reply)
I aim to disappoint

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:33, Reply)
What a spiteful person he's turned out to be biggers

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:36, Reply)
I no rite.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:36, Reply)
I'm sticking the cunt on ignore as an expression of my clique solidarity

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:38, Reply)
You're such a tower of strength for me sometimes Rory.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:39, Reply)
Not sure, but I think Rory was paying me a compliment there

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:38, Reply)
I've banged the ignore drum, you're dead to me

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:41, Reply)
Oh, just as we were starting to become such good friends as well...
If you're going to do it properly, better make sure you keep reiterating this point.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:43, Reply)
I would not dream of calling the person in question anything so complimentary.
If I were speaking to her.


Which I am not.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:43, Reply)
Judging by my internet history at the moment
it would appear that I'm really into job websites. Some of the job descriptions get me really hot and bothered. "You will delight your customers". PHWOOOOAAAR! EH?
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:31, Reply)
How many porn sites do you average a day?

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:34, Reply)
Does it vary weekday, weekend, or does time have no meaning any more?

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:34, Reply)
Heeeeyyy,
I'm the one who does the stats here boy.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:38, Reply)
He's being coy, I rekon there's a spike in his porn usage on depression Tuesdays

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:42, Reply)
None, Rory.
I'm 40, not 14.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:36, Reply)
So you usually toss off to the bbc Dr Who page, interesting

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:37, Reply)
Your profile page, actually.
I find I can last for ages that way, it's better than thinking about Thatcher right before the vinegar strokes.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:40, Reply)
I'll get round to fixing it one day, it's a blaireau bodge at the moment

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:43, Reply)
thank YOU to you and lusty for hosting
great fun. although i fear that you will be eating leftovers and picking bits of pasta and glass off the floor for weeks...
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:44, Reply)
Did you get drunk and break stuff?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:45, Reply)
She was unstoppable.
I threw her out when she set fire to the curtains.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:47, Reply)
Where will you wipe your cock now?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:48, Reply)
On my new football shirt that I'm going to purchase tomorrow.
Now that I'm really into sport.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:58, Reply)
You are David Mellor AICM mind bleach

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:00, Reply)
Oh my fucking actual fucking god
I feel genuinely sick now
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:03, Reply)
the first bit is totally true
the second is not. i was VERY well behaved and am probably the only person ever to have gone to monty's and stuck to coke.

of the kind that is made and bottled in uxbridge.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:48, Reply)
Another glass hit the deck after you left.
It was like a Jewish wedding.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:46, Reply)
Oish!

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:48, Reply)
blimey
next time i will bring spare wine glasses too!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:48, Reply)
I think plastic beakers might be best.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:57, Reply)
Laminated b3tans?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:58, Reply)
yes
save the wine glasses for your daughter, she'd prob take better care of them.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:00, Reply)
Morning Monty
At the moment, not much. I'm still really enjoying cooking, but haven't cooked anything new in about a month. Also, my pasta dish at the weekend could have been better.

Ah well, payday on Friday, should be a better month!
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:53, Reply)
You should cook this, it's piss easy and you'd like it
www.bbc.co.uk/food/recipes/sausagesandmustard_92487
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:55, Reply)
Hmm, I'm considering a sausage dish this weekend, I managed to get my hands on some wild boar sausages this weekend
Going to cook them this weekend with probably some onions, red wine, paprika, carrots, tomatoes and serve with mash. (or something along those lines).

But next time I get my hands on some decent pork sausages, shall definitely give that a go.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:58, Reply)
You should cook this:
www.nakersisabentfuckingspastic.co.uk/mingeflaps
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:59, Reply)
/mingeflaps
hahahahahaha
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:00, Reply)
lololololol

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:04, Reply)
the soup in our staff restaurant today is...
HOT AND SOUR FISH BROTH

how fucking disgusting have they made that sound?!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:55, Reply)
Like going down on a Thai whore with a yeast infection

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:56, Reply)
ffs

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:01, Reply)
O_O

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:02, Reply)
Not that it would affect your disposition towards it
but they could at least specify the fish
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:58, Reply)
Mersey trout

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:58, Reply)

Mersey Brown
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:17, Reply)
Urgh.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:58, Reply)
Hot and sour soup is fucking delicious
But that sounds vile.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:58, Reply)
Going to football is not about watching football.
That's the least important aspect. Football is about getting pissed and off your tits with your mates. You'll have a ball.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:59, Reply)
If he has the ball, what will the girls play with?
Or have I understood the game incorrectly?
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:00, Reply)
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:01, Reply)
I am really into this video.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=3GRSbr0EYYU
Seriously, everyone needs to watch it. I've watched it about a hundred times since last night and still piss myself laughing every time.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:03, Reply)
Um...

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:05, Reply)
I fail to see how anyone can not piss themselves laughing.
It's like a scene from a madcap 70s sitcom about a flustered Englishman and his cheeky dog, Benton.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:09, Reply)
There are many mysteries in life which we are destined not to understand, Barry
The suggestions that David Walliams is either straight or amusing... the enduring popularity of r'n'b... Quentin...
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:14, Reply)
This gentleman speaks for me in this regard.

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:18, Reply)
Morning, Reverend
Are you well?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:21, Reply)
I most certainly am mate.
Yourself?
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:32, Reply)
Good to hear
Yeah am not bad thanks mate. Got a Ballroom competition in, get this, fucking DisneyLand next weekend.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:33, Reply)
Ah of course, gay Par-ee.
How long you away for? Are you staying at Disney, or in Paris itself?
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:42, Reply)
Staying at Disney - Hotel New York
Very swank. Can't wait - going for five days including travel time
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:43, Reply)
Cool. Took the kids there years ago and really enjoyed it. You been before?

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:47, Reply)
Yep, once
It's going to be fucking cold, is the only problem. Am already working out whose Christmas present I can scrimp on for the sake of an extra day in the parks
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:51, Reply)
Scrimp on everybody's
Best not to play favourites.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:53, Reply)
Excellent plan
*cancels hovercraft purchase*
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:57, Reply)
I'm going to deduce from the fact that you aren't a football fan but are going to a football match
That you're going as a corporate spare ticket prawn sandwiches pinkie fuckfest.
(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:05, Reply)
Anyone that goes to football and says that they wouldn't have a corporate box over their normal seat is a liar.
I blagged my way into a box once and it's the best time I've ever had watching football.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:07, Reply)
I've got no basis for comparison
but I fucking love the atmosphere of being in the stands more than I can say
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:09, Reply)
Away games I'd agree.
But monotonous home games can fuck off, not interesting at all. Boxes however are class, you're basically in a big glass room with unlimited food, drink and waitresses to look after you.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:11, Reply)
I have a sneaking suspicion that if given the chance to find out I may agree with you
I love the atmosphere because it reminds me of being a kid at Forest, when we were, y'know, good
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:15, Reply)

stands urinal in the gents at G.A.Y., in a pair of rubber pants and agimp mask
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:15, Reply)
agimp?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:16, Reply)
Yes.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:17, Reply)
Harsh

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:20, Reply)
My brother in law had a season ticket behind the goal at Goodison
I can't imagine him giving that up for a box.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:09, Reply)

ox etter team
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:09, Reply)
Well, that too

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:12, Reply)
Morning chap
How's you?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:16, Reply)
Not too bad thanks, you?

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:25, Reply)
Yeah on the up cheers
Making paella tonight, I've decided. Any tips?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:28, Reply)
It needs chorizo and prawns etc, not sure how that will work for a veggie

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:29, Reply)
She's out teaching this evening
Prawns I have, ditto mussels and squid, getting chorizo at lunchtime, and chicken. Have paella rice, stock, lemons, shallots, garlic, white wine. Chillies if I fancy them, which I will. What am I missing? Apart from saffron, which I'm hoping there's a cheaper alternative to.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:33, Reply)
Just use turmeric.

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:36, Reply)
That's what I usually do
Thank you both for the advice
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:37, Reply)
Saffron is only for coulour really, and you'll get some of that from the stock and chrozio

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:36, Reply)
It's not really .. it has a very specific delicate flavour
but it's not a deal-breaker.

If you're getting colour from your stock I should be quite scared, though...
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:39, Reply)
If you cook rice with nice stock it will give it some colour, not bright yellow saffron colour
but the rice won't be bright white
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:40, Reply)
well ... yeah.
I suppose that's strictly true. but it's not really colour like the paprika from chorizo, say.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:43, Reply)
I did roast potatoes with saffron once.
They were bloody lovely.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:52, Reply)
There isn't.
Although you can use tumeric if you just want the yellow colour.

It needs a bit of chilli, yes, also tomatoes and red pepper. Clams are better than mussels but much more of an arse to find.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:38, Reply)
If you're using squid, I believe that you either have to cook it very quickly, or very slowly.

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:41, Reply)
very quickly.
Squid isn't great slow-cooked, although you can.

If they are baby squid, chop them into rings. If it's a full size bugger, split the body open once you've cleaned it, then run a dinner knife over the inside in a criss-cross pattern. cook it other side down for 45 secs then scored side down for 45 secs. It'll roll up into a tube, then slice it and throw it on top of the finished paella.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:46, Reply)
it will still be an inedible rubbery piece of shit though

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:53, Reply)
Nah, you just need to get fresh squid.
If it's fresh and it comes out rubbery you've cooked it totally wrong.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 11:03, Reply)
Cook the chorizo with a good glug of oil in the pan first
Then remove once it's done, that will give the next ingredients added a great colouring. I tend to go for chicken and chorizo, although next time I'm also going to include king prawns in there.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:35, Reply)
Seafood is a must for me
I fucking love seafood. Thanks for the tip mate
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:38, Reply)
strictly paella is rabbit, snails and green vegetables
but that's getting ridiculously picky even for a ponce like me.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:41, Reply)
We've got fucking masses of snails in our back garden
Cheers
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:49, Reply)
Not to worry

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:41, Reply)
I'M FINE. THANKS FOR ASKING

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:27, Reply)
No point asking the beakers
They'll tell you anyway

Look^
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:29, Reply)
Coming from the author of "The Squits: My Story" by Darth Foxtrot

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:30, Reply)
I never thought of publishing it
People will definitely want to read that, cheers mate
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:31, Reply)
I thought this post from Fisto was an excerpt from it
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1441524
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:34, Reply)
Between this and the Mellor thing you are fast becoming the most disgusting human being ever

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:37, Reply)
That is some going in this place

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:39, Reply)
It was mostly the Mellor reference
Some things should be forgotten by everyone ever
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:47, Reply)
That's because he is an utter bender

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:09, Reply)
He got given it by Neil Buchanan I expect.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:14, Reply)
Brother in Law, not brother.

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:25, Reply)
What is the Buchannon link?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:27, Reply)
AA told some shameless lies about how his brother is best mates with Neil Buchanan
and how he was best man at his wedding and is thanked on the back of the Art Attack DVD and loads of other total lies.

The reality is rather less glamorous: AA fancies Neil Buchanan and has disturbing wank fantasies about him.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:36, Reply)
it wasn't PVA all along!

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:37, Reply)
Hahah

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:37, Reply)
Don't encourage him for Christ's sake.

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:50, Reply)
It all stems from here
b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post962945
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:40, Reply)
A football match?
Oh come on, Monty - you're better than that.

I'm really in to shopping for sensible shoes with your mum.

My morning has just been made better with the application of a bacon sandwich. Oh yes.
(I helped save b3ta! crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:31, Reply)
Free booze, Crackers.
FREE BOOZE.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:34, Reply)
Fair play.
*joins in chants*
(I helped save b3ta! crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:35, Reply)
My favourite flavour

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:35, Reply)
YOUR ALL PRICKS

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:35, Reply)
You're

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:40, Reply)
NO YOU ARE

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:48, Reply)
YOURS AS WELL

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:40, Reply)
screee
gonna kill myself now, this shit is right dull
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:48, Reply)
I'm really into coughing.
And last night, my darth foxtrot tribute act.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:41, Reply)
My mum's hurt her back with that much coughing

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:42, Reply)
I've hurt my shoulders. I hope you're doting on her.

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:44, Reply)
Silly b3th
A vicious bumming will not cure your cough
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:46, Reply)
And how, pray tell, do you know that?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:48, Reply)
Mrs Foxtrot was still coughing when I left last night

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:48, Reply)
textbook.

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:52, Reply)
Well played indeed sir

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:53, Reply)
10/10

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:55, Reply)
What?
you spent the night letting sailors punish your ring?
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:47, Reply)
I'm really into having too much to do

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:41, Reply)
Doing things is very overrated.
Morning sis!
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 22 Nov 2011, 10:42, Reply)

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