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# can't touch this.
(blattermaus gwapple me gwapenuts, Mon 18 Jun 2012, 19:25, archived)
# haha that's great! would you post #1 please?
(I helped save b3ta! sock more tea vicar?, Mon 18 Jun 2012, 19:29, archived)
# here you go
(blattermaus gwapple me gwapenuts, Mon 18 Jun 2012, 19:31, archived)
# brill :D
(I helped save b3ta! sock more tea vicar?, Mon 18 Jun 2012, 19:34, archived)
# the actual grace said by a vicar at a posh dinner I was at once...
Oh gracious Lord devine
who turned the water into wine
please forgive us foolish men
we're going to turn it back again
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Mon 18 Jun 2012, 21:05, archived)
# Haha
Opposite Jesus is a cunt.

Does he end by shitting on his own hands while condemning Pilate to death on the cross?
(I helped save b3ta! boris the spider, Mon 18 Jun 2012, 19:30, archived)
# Pilate makes the crowd choose between him and Barabus, who to send to Alton Towers for the day
(I helped save b3ta! Photoshop Bitch 2014 edition, Mon 18 Jun 2012, 19:43, archived)
# And one assumes Opposite Christ wasn't born of a virgin birth
but as the result of a frenzied Roman gangbang
(I helped save b3ta! boris the spider, Mon 18 Jun 2012, 19:52, archived)
#
So when Opposite Jesus dies. If his mum's still alive. What then?
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Mon 18 Jun 2012, 19:56, archived)
# I'm guessing no hot cross buns?
(I helped save b3ta! Ghoti Fingers, Mon 18 Jun 2012, 19:59, archived)
# cold happy buns
(I helped save b3ta! boris the spider, Mon 18 Jun 2012, 20:06, archived)
# Everyone puking up chocolate everywhere.
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Mon 18 Jun 2012, 20:06, archived)
# And lo! The angel Gabriel did appear
"You will be visited this night"
"Really? By the spirit of our Lord God?"
"No, by 'some soldiers' "
"ooh, what's Latin for 'bukkake'? "
(I helped save b3ta! Ghoti Fingers, Mon 18 Jun 2012, 19:58, archived)
# multijizzius
(I helped save b3ta! boris the spider, Mon 18 Jun 2012, 20:06, archived)
# Wasn't that Harry Potters bedtime game with Ron Weasley?
(I helped save b3ta! Ghoti Fingers, Mon 18 Jun 2012, 20:09, archived)
# no
that was jizzianus
(I helped save b3ta! boris the spider, Mon 18 Jun 2012, 20:22, archived)
# ...and he scoffed all those fishes and loaves himself,
the greedy bastard.
(I helped save b3ta! enceladus, Mon 18 Jun 2012, 19:32, archived)
# he
loaves to share
(blattermaus gwapple me gwapenuts, Mon 18 Jun 2012, 19:43, archived)
# It wasn't quite like that...
b3ta.com/board/10790767
(I helped save b3ta! Photoshop Bitch 2014 edition, Mon 18 Jun 2012, 19:44, archived)
# I thought I saw Jesus
on a tram
I said "Are you Jesus ?"
He said "Fuck Off ! I'm Opposite Jesus"

apologies to Spike Milligan
(I helped save b3ta! Dick Wonder ₐ wₒₙₖy, wₐᵥy wₒₙdₑᵣ, Mon 18 Jun 2012, 19:39, archived)
# lol, that jesus - what a cunt
I also did a cartoon:

Click for bigger (31 kb)
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Mon 18 Jun 2012, 19:53, archived)
# What a rotter.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Howdy, Mon 18 Jun 2012, 21:00, archived)
# he'll have someone's eye out like that...
(I helped save b3ta! maggenspies mayhaps, Mon 18 Jun 2012, 21:33, archived)
# hahaha
even better than the first!
(I helped save b3ta! alpaca muffalo bozzerella, Mon 18 Jun 2012, 22:06, archived)